Kerry Never Saw That

Ain't Valentines Day at KNST has been celebrated by watching another relationship movie- Perfect. Kerry was unaware that this movie existed. (She wishes she still were.) Jamie Lee Curtis is HAWT but the faces that she and John Travolta make at each other while Jazzercizing are wholly inexcusable.

In this episode, Kerry and Honeybeard ponder the logistics of dirty-dish nookie, Glenn Close's crunchy hair, Michael Douglass' stamina, and forget the rabbit...what is up with that child's hair?

Like, OH. MY. GOD. This episode is so bitchin! Kerry like totally like, almost five piled it in like the first five minutes, but fer sure, she kept watching. So did she think this was totally tubular or grody to the max? Well Peter Piper picked a pepper, I guess you'll have to listen and find out! As if! Thank you as always to The Hooplas for the music! Check them out on Spotify, Bandcamp, and all...

Honeybeard's joy cannot be contained as it's his favorite time of year...Happy Nic Year! Celebrating the genius of one Mr. Nicolas Cage, listen as we evaluate Cher's A-listerness, Nic Cage's moistness and proximity to a glory hole, and some perplexing age gaps. And why doe he wear a glove on a wooden hand? Intro music by The Hooplas "Carolina Love Song" Outro music by Old Suns "Necklace"

Kerry Christmas, everybody (x2!!) The second film in our Xmas double feature has arrived, wrapped, under your...address bar. A Muppet version of The Gift of the Magi where they sing a knee-slapper about how absurdly massive Grandma Otter's bathing suit was- hilarity ensues! Can't forget about Pa and how he kindly died and left them destitute as a result of his failed "snake oil" venture. Good time...

Kerry Christmas, everybody! Here is the first half of our Xmas gift to you- a Jim Henson double feature! Why are Muppet legs so disturbing? Why do we spit in the face of God by allowing the unnatural relationship between Gonzo and Camilla the chicken?! Is Miss Piggy a sex pest?? (Spoiler alert- yes. Yes she is.)

Everybody remembers the ultra-precious Gizmo, but do you happen to recall the questionable relationship between grown-ass Billy who works in a bank for a living and 11-year-old Pete (Corey Feldman) who just comes over and hangs out in Billy's bedroom? On Billy's bed. With Billy. Also, can we talk about how Gizmo's litter in Gremlins 2 seemed...different? Special? Slightly undercooked? Crooked??

Planes, trains, and...goose shit?? We have been sitting on this one for a while, and it is perfect for Thanksgiving Day! You don't want to miss Kerry reenacting the rental car tirade in her specific brand of southern drawl! Honeybeard notes that Steve Martin's wife is making bedroom eyes at John Candy and pontificates what they will be having for dessert! As always thanks to The Hooplas for lettin...

Here's the final course of T.Hanksgiving- The 'Burbs! We've all had weird neighbors, but maybe not THIS weird...that's right, we're talking about Corey Feldman! Why TF is he even IN this movie?! Why did Honeybeard bully a poor kid just because his name was Art? And is he really fart?? These are the burning questions that inquiring people want to know!

T. Hanksgiving continues with The Money Pit which left Kerry with new anxieties surrounding home ownership. Yakov Smirnoff...I'm sorry, who?? Kerry and Honeybeard BOTH want the huge portrait of the Maestro in their living room! We learned that studio apartments in SoHo are reportedly $350/month- OUTRAGEOUS! Kudos to The Hooplas for making the kickass "Carolina Love Song" that is our intro/outro am...

People. Against. Goodness. And. Normalcy. P.A.G.A.N. PAGAN. Kerry has heard these words many times over the years, and now she gets to see where they originated! This was a fun one that required a few "bleeps" and was elevated even further with the addition of the official change to our intro/outro music to Carolina Love Song by The Hooplas! How did Streebeck convince Muzz to place his testicles i...

It is still October, so here is another S'Kerry movie- Phantasm. WTF even IS this movie? Reggie and his 1950s soda-jerk ice cream clothes are integral to the understanding of this intellectual tour-de-force! Just kidding. Kerry was expecting balls. Like, many flying, shiny, silver balls with fancy knife attachments! She was underwhelmed in that regard. Somebody call the "Cinnabytes" because Honeyb...

The second-helping of our surprise baseball Double-Header is here with 1976's Bad News Bears! Kerry has some thoughts on small children that have "colorful" vocabularies and several questions regarding how a middle-aged-man (named Kelly Leak) with a second mortgage qualified to play in this little league. Honeybeard pontificates on a young Jason Voorhees playing for the Bad News Scares (sKERs)!

Major League! An MLB related classic being brought to you (as part of a Double Header!!) in recognition of the World Series! This one is breaking established format expectations because it happens to be one of the first recordings we made. So grab your peanuts and Cracker Jacks and settle in to see if Kerry assigns this popular film one, two, or three strikes (YOU'RE OUT)!!

Kerry thought this was going to be a movie like Puppet Master...it was NOT like Puppet Master. This movie is damp. It is soggy. it is very, very wet. Kerry was delighted to learn "Pinhead" was a big ole sassy pants, but disappointed to learn "Cinna-bites" are not literal tiny cinnamon-flavored treats!! Honeybeard tells his best "Jason versus" to date. Stick around at the end of the episode- Kerry...

It's October, which can only mean it is FINALLY time for S'Kerry Movies™ on KNST!! Grab your own sweet treat (if you want to) as you settle in to listen to Kerry's reaction to Honeybeard's "trick" of pretending this was a good movie!! *Mua-hahaha* This one had some technical difficulties, but hopefully entertains! Kerry LOVED the Alice in Wonderland costume, but that alone cannot give a movie a hi...

Hold up...Kerry never saw THIS movie? The Phoebe Cates pool scene?! Spicoli?? Wow. Hey- why did Phoebe Cates get all the acclaim when JJL was the one sowing her wild oats all over Ridgemont?

Our 'Back to School' theme continues and 1985's Vision Quest has come to KNST town bringing high school wrestling, Native American lore, Matthew Modine AND Madonna! WWE is entertaining, but who knew high school wrestling could be so popular?! Kerry had definitely heard the song "Crazy for You" but had no idea it was in this movie...and still doesn't understand WHY it was. Vision Quest was personal...

Kerry takes her first trip to the Blue Oyster Bar! How awkward must it have been for Mahoney under that podium? How many times can Honeybeard say, "The Goot" before Kerry loses her sanity?! I wonder what happened to poor FlavaFlav when he escaped his height.

It's back to school time, so here you go. We had enough of young people and their silly problems following the Brat Pack summer- we had to age up. Why does Kerry HATE Jason Melon? RDJ steals this movie by doing nothing. Rodney Dangerfield looks like there is excessive pressure in his cranium pushing his eyeballs out with ease, and how exactly did he become famous? The infamous "Triple Lindy" of co...

Our first bonus episode! As we wrap up, discuss, and award our favorite Bractors and Bractresses from our wild Brat Pack summer!! This one doesn't follow format, so it's a bonus!! Award categories include such bangers as best supporting Bractor, best hair, most toxic couple, and BIGGEST L'IL BITCH.

Ah yes, a beloved classic Kerry was sure to love, right? RIGHT? Listen to find out where she (and Cap'n Honeybeard) land on this iconic 80s teen flick. F-bombs and nudity in a PG-rated tween movie? Come join us for some Long (Duck) Dong! Plus, a huge shoutout to the amazing Belushi Speedball for letting us use their song at the end of the episode. And what is an oily bohunk anyway?

Was it all a blue-bathwater fever dream? Don't suggest that to Honeybeard!! He can only sleep at night by knowing John Wisdom's last meal was a modestly-delicious discarded (tuna salad?!) sandwich. Does Chinese food really taste better out of those white to-go boxes with the red pagoda on the side?? Kerry desperately needs to know! As an aside- how erotic is making your tongue imitate a windshield...

Only one Brat Packer? One Emilio is worth at least two Brat Packers! Kerry does a complete 180 on this one during the show; listen to find out how and why. (Turns out she just needed Honeybeard to mansplain it to her)

How good is Robert Downey Jr in this? Why did we have to wait this long to see Andrew McCarthy's Winnie the Pooh impression? What di Kerry make Honeybeard bleep this week?