Journey From Grief to Healing

In Episode 45 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, M and I meet. I want to talk about my emotional storm. Instead, M encourages me to talk about suffering without thinking about the words I'm saying. M told me to let the words roll off my tongue. When I finished, M shared a story about her trip to NYC and how it taught her a wonderful lesson about suffering. She shared it with me and chan...

In Episode 44 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I describe how I believed being grateful will help me finally defeat grieving. I was riding a winning streak of good days. I didn't realize there was more to learn. My winning streak continued until an intense emotional storm struck. M told me I was going to have to learn to dance with suffering and learn its lessons if I was to continue...

In Episode 43 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I achieved a breakthrough in in my grieving process. I believe it to be a significant and transformative step forward. The hurt hasn't gone away, but I am now, moving toward a positive emotional space. 

In Episode 42 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I take M's advice and journal about my gratitude for the life I lived with Babe. There were no tears, no pain, no suffering. I was filled with good memories and I smiled all the while I journaled. I am making progress.

In Episode 41 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, M meets with me the Monday after the Thanksgiving Holiday. M wanted to check on me to see how I handled the holiday while grieving. Our conversation took a surprise turn while we were chatting and M helped me to see the difference between being intellectually grateful and heart-felt grateful. I know I'm making progress.

in Episode 40 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I take M's advice and journal. M said to trust my instincts on choosing my journal topic. When I saw a beautiful monarch butterfly fly close to me I took it as a sign to journal about the love Babe and I shared.

In Episode 39 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I share several small victories and how my first mentor gave me permission to trust my instincts. M tells me that my instincts are a gift from God and are one way that God use to communicate with me. She encourages me to listen to the voice of my instincts and trust them on my grieving journey.

In Episode 38 of my podcast, Journey From Grief to Healing, M and I talk about stumbling forward. Each time I fall and rise M calls it a small victory. I sense I am stumbling forward toward the finish line. I've made up my mind to be fiercely independent and not farm anything out. I want to do everything for myself wherever possible. I am learning and stumbling forward all at the same time. I have...

In Episode 37 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I make a decision to unshackle the hold grieving has on me by choosing to live. M encouraged me to make small victories. I'm intent on having a lot of small wins during the day. Choosing to live doesn't stop the pain or make the memories go away, but they are giving me confidence that maybe healing is possible. 

In Episode 36 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, M and I talk about the small, important decisions a grieving person must make each day. Each decision is a decision to choose to live and continue on with life instead of giving into despair. I feel good. Although I still hurt, I'm making the small, choosing to live decisions.

In Episode 35, of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I talk about the why questions that continually play in my mind without providing an answer. M and I talk about how suffering changed me and taught me lessons I could not have learned any other way. 

In Episode 34 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing M challenges me to choose to live and begin looking for all the good things life has to offer. I am choosing to live. It's a big step and I'm ready to take it.

In Episode 33 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I describe my emotions as I attended the Catholic church services for All Saints Day and All Souls Day (Dia de los Meurtos). I was among many who lost someone they loved. Together we knew what each was feeling at a deep visceral level. Although it was an emotional experience, I emerged more resolved to walk toward healing.

In Episode 32 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, i chose to eat the pain do something that was emotionally painful for me. This led to two breakthroughs and important steps toward healing on my grieving journey.

In Episode 31 of my podcast, Journey From Grief to Healing, I talk about the small steps I take to get through the day. Grieving doesn't leave me, but I believe I'm making progress although my progress at times needs a microscope to measure it. It's where I am 10 weeks into my grieving period.

In Episode 30 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I awake from a nightmare at 3 a.m. My dream quickly turns into an emotional storm. M and I meet, I'm looking for answers, M gives me tough love. I needed it. Progress through grieving comes in stops and starts. 

In Episode 29 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I describe how my life changed after Babe's death. I come to the realization that I have a choice: I can drown or swim, there is no in between. I choose to swim. #grieving

In Episode 28 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I describe how grieving and its accompanying partner suffering changed me. It is as if I am seeing my world with a different set of eyes. I also share the fourth promise I made to myself with M. 

In Episode 27 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I recall some good memories I had with Babe about the seemingly insignificant things Iwere a big deal to her. Recalling these moments brought a smile to my face. I must be making progress. I'm recalling good memories and smiling.

In Episode 26 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, M and I talk about grieving's emotional storms. To me they feel like hurricane winds hit me. M says it feel like the ocean tide was swallowing her. I tell M I am making 4 promises I intend to keep each day to help me move on.  

In Episode 25 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I choose to live. I know I am battered by my emotions that are attempting to drown me in a river of sadness and depression, but I choose not to let them. I choose to live. My choice makes a difference to me. My choice doesn't stop my strong grieving emotions from attacking me. Now I know they will not get the best of me.

In Episode 24 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, M and I talk about the role emotions play in grieving. Grieving the death of a loved one puts our emotions on steroids. M helps me to understand the importance of choosing to master my emotions and not let my emotions have mastery over me.

In Episode 23 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, I journal about the emotions I experience in my grieving state. I recognize, perhaps for the first time, how strong a grip the emotions have on me. Journaling about my grieving emotions made me face them. Although it was difficult, I think it's an important step forward. 

In Episode 22 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, M told me I took a giant step forward. My grieving group experience has been extremely beneficial for me. Only one more grieving group session. I'll miss the group when it's over.  M asks me if I've emotionally accepted Babe's death. It causes me to think about my emotions.

In Episode 20 of my podcast, Journey from Grief to Healing, M uses to tough love to snap me out of my funk. She has me confront some tough truths about grieving. I know she is right. Her tough love proved to be the spark I needed. Maybe I turned a corner.