It’s Not All Rainbows: Surviving Abusive LGBTQIA+ Relationships

On today's episode, I talk about post seperation abuse, or narcissistic collapse, which can happen when a victim leaves their abuser. It can be VERY dangerous, so it's important to know that this MAY happen and to take measures to protect yourself. Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching/LGBTQ+ support group: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman FREE safety planning: thehotline.org

In this episode I talk about my escape plan, or lack thereof, and what I would do differently if I could do it over. Website: thelindsaygoodman 1:1 coaching/LGBTQ+ support group: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodmanFREE Safety Planning tool: thehotline.org

In this episode, I talk about some of the things that can contribute to power imbalances in abusive relationships, especially those those that are less obvious to society. Power imbalances are an essential tool in abusive relationships. Website: thelindsaygoodman.com1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In today’s Monday Mini, I talk about how an abusive person can react to YOUR success vs how they expect you to react to their minor achievements.

In this episode, I talk about how often in abusive relationships, survivors lose their ability to make decisions, both big and small.

In this episode I talk about how abusive people may use your struggles to abuse you. Any struggles (mental/physical/financial) that you came into the relationshiop with or any that pop up during the relationship are fair game. Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching/LGBTQ Support Group: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

Trying out Monday Minis. Today I’m taking about BOUNDARIES.

In this episode I talk about something I call the "mean hoover." I've talked about "nice" hoovering, reverse hoovering, and now this. The yucky, horrible side of the hoovering technique. Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode, I talk about how an abusive person will use a sob story very early on to try to garner your sympathy and get you to prematurely feel a sense of trust and connection with them. LOOK OUT FOR THIS!

In this episode, I talk about how going on vacation with an abusive person will NOT make things any better. In fact, they will most likely use it as a perfect setting to amp up the abuse. Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching/LGBTQ+ Support Group: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode, I talk about how often survivors of abuse wait for the "right moment" to leave their abuser and the pros and cons of doing so. Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching/ LGBTQ+ Support Group: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode, I talk about how ANY response is an open door to an abusive person. Sometimes it can be tempting to respond "LEAVE ME ALONE" or "I NEVER WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN." However, an abusive person will take this as another opportunity.  Website: thelindsaygoodman.com  1:1 coaching/LGBTQ+ Support Group: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode I talk about what it looks like when a haelthy or non-abusive person sets a boundary vs when an abusive person sets a "boundary." Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman LGBTQ+ support group (one Saturday a month): calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode I interview Andrew Campbell, author of Not Without My Pet, Understanding the Relationship Between Victims of Domestic Violence And Their Pets.  You can find Andrew at @amcampbell84 on twitter You can find his book Not Without My Pet here: https://www.amazon.com/Not-Without-Pet-Understanding-Relationship/dp/195626700X/ref=sr_1_1?crid=6ZQKKQDJTO76&keywords=not+without+my+pet...

In this episode I talk about an insidious but easy to spot tactic of abuse: the reverse hoover.    Website: thelindsaygoodman.com   1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode, I talk about the way trauma bonded survivors often reach out to their abuser for help and support where there is none.   Website: thelindsaygoodman.com  1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode I talk about some of the things that my abuser told me I would never be able to do without them that I'm doing just fine since I left!   Website: thelindsaygoodman.com  1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode I talk about the difference in how I talked about an unhappy but not abusive relationship vs the abusive relationship while I was in then. Quite often, abuse victims LOSE THEIR VOICES. Have you experienced this?   website: thelindsaygoodman.com  1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode, I talk about how the first move from your abuser was probably a calculated move on their part rather than a chance encounter.  Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode I read examples of hoovering attempts from my own screenshots of emails/texts from my abuser. Learn to spot hoovering when you see it and RUN.    Website: thelindsaygoodman.com  1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode, I read a letter I recently found that I had written to my abuser while I was still with them. I talk about gaslighting and trauma bonds and how this letter is a perfect example of both.    Website: thelindsaygoodman.com  1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

MANY survivors of abuse ask themselves "am I the toxic one?" In this episode I talk about why we so often end up feeling this way.   Website: thelindsaygoodman.com  1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode I talk about a few of the breadcrumbs I "tolerated" while I was with my abuser and some of the ways you can tell that was indeed breadcrumbing and not a kind gesture.   Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman

In this episode, I talk about a personal experience I had (TW: Physical abuse) with an abusive person who had an uncanny interest in psychology and domestic violence.  Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 trauma recovery coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman 

In this episode, I talk about some of my observations when it comes to abusive people and their "friends."  Website: thelindsaygoodman.com 1:1 trauma recovery coaching: calendly.com/thelindsaygoodman