It's All My Fault

Here in the 50th installment of iKudB.Rong I find myself in the ironic position of knowing iKudNotB.Rong. Not about this! Irony yes. This no. Bringing in a co-host to work through the wonderful world of animals was a better Friday than the Friday I'd already thought it was going to be. Which means it was an even awesomer Friday than the awesome Friday I'd envisioned. If this were what all Fridays...

It's Friday. And even though I have a job, I can still enjoy today because it's my day off. Yeah. Days off. And because of roughly 100 other things that come to mind besides it being my day off... but I digress. And all happens in the next episode anyhow so talk about coming early... or something like that. What happens here, instead, is a whole lot of God talk. Yeah I know. It surprised the hell...

Oh Madonna. Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna Madonna... You certainly deserve better than all the risqué locker room talk swirling about in this recording. Of that I'm sure. I'm also sure that I'll be on your dreamla-la-la-land therapy couch sometime next week so you can properly chastise this here spacetime reality faux pas of mine. Until then... I bid you adieu. Or...

Needing a reason to take magic mushrooms... I do not. Trying to decide if there is a legit reason not to take them (so as not to experience a negative go-around... ever). Well, that's a little bit of what this one's all about. At least I think it is. At least I hope it is. iKudB.Rong Episode 47 of 53

I cannot say if this has ever happened prior to today. I seriously doubt it. But on this day - the 28th of December - in whatever year you determine you want to call this year here we're about to say au revoir to - on this day, I said I would go to work and it would improve my day for the better. AND that happened!!! Really happened. I swear it's the truth. Not that you should listen in and confir...

Several trips to the shower, a cookie reevaluation dilemma and an embarassing pile of bathtub dishes all make gratuitous appearances in this one. So you got that going for you... !!!!! And for crying out loud... If that doesn't say "PASS" - I really really really really really cannot imagine what does for you. Seriously. ????? I simply simply simply simply simply cannot imagine what that could be....

I am "Dennis-the-Menace" baked for this one. Ergo, anybody tired of lame comedic efforts only a previous decade might appreciate should find a different dryer to bounce around inside of because this one is on the fluff cycle and the lint screen is so full it's leaving fuzz on everything. iKudB.Rong Episode 44 of 53

What's that you asked? What's the buzz??? Well... 'twas the day after Christmas so let me tell you what's a'happenin' (and remember to think about today inistead since I don';t want to be giving you no facts and figures): I have got to do something about my spiking libido. This is not to include "jerking off" more Optimally this will include another person. Sub-optimally this will include Electric...

I may have started December off on a dry-cheeked note, but boy-oh-boy am I making up for it here in the final days of 2022. The sobbing/snotting in this one gets so rampant I had to go blow my nose somewhere other than on the floor next to the dog. I KNOW! How much crying is possible in one of these sit-com lengthed episode like the one herein contained? Clocking in, I might add, perfectly at 22.5...

Lots of questions, very few answers and one forced admission to a humiliating mistake I thought I was incapable of making. Sometimes life throws you a wedding day on which it rains - amirite Alanis? iKudB.Rong Episode 41 of 53

Okay, listen up y'all. Especially all you Spotifiers. Let's get 4 things straight! This one's quite literally all for Spotify. And as always, nobody else should be listening to these recordings, not even you suckers on Spotify. But u do u. And I'll be over here trying not to watch. iKudB.Rong Episode 40 of 53

I guess the whirly-swirly day that is Christmas is the type of roller coaster ride that leaves all participants windblown and a little nauseous. Or maybe that was the insane amount of edibles I consumed while at my parents' house today... however you want to reverse engineer the condition, the advice from here is to go do something better with your life. Seriously. I mean it. Anybody want a peanut...

In true "me me me me me me me" fashion, I make our (might -be-made-up) lord-and-savior's Feliz Navidad celebration - you GUESSED it - all about me! Or do I??? I know that I talk A LOT about how being trained to dislike ourselves can make us capable of anything. (Even throwing one of our shoes at George Bush's head) And how breaking that cycle - if YOU'RE trapped within it - is crucial to leading a...

Is Christmas Eve the eleventh day of Christmas or is it the twelfth? Either way it's definitely the day I threw a dirty snot-filled Kleenex directly into my dad's face. Of this, I could not be wrong. I just don't know if my pipers were piping or my drummers were drumming in the background as this action took place... I suppose it was both. If I'd been listening closely enough. Maybe next year. iKu...

Somehow this one finishes with me spilling chocolate syrup all over myself. HA HA HA! Wait a sec, did I just type that?? Somehow bro??!!?!!?!? Okay okay okay. To be fair. I am higher than a lucidly dreamt air compressor above my head at tHD by the end of everything here.... And in the grand finale, my mouth is filled to the absolute maximum with Reese's Peanut Butter Chips so yeah... I end up with...

My enthusiasm, much like carmelized onions, is on a slow burn and only getting sweeter. So I've got that going for me. Plus, it's Christmas Eve so there's some "water breakage" to celebrate. So I've got that going for me... but then again... So do you. Amirite? iKudB.Rong Episode 35 of 53

I can get so stupidly obsessed with details... anybody else? If anything asks "is he on the autism scale?", that'd be it. Even so, I can, at times, see the bigger picture. And I believe that one of those times is now. And I also believe that I'm doing so again and again and again and again. Talk about having a good day! Am I right? iKudB.Rong Episode 34 of 53

It's still cold. I have to get to work. And I said some stuff without crying. No more time, gotta eat so hi-ho hi-ho... you know the rest. iKudB.Rong Episode 33 of 53

And to think, I actually thought I might make it through December without a single recorded tear falling. Um... that's a negative toast writer. In fact, some characters from my past deserve their own player sheet analysis in depth since their influence is all over these recordings . Nicole is one such character. Consider her player sheet now complete. Or should that actually be "incomplete"? Let's...

Okay. I know I said I'd stop with the inanity of discussing today's weather... ... ... but since the hour is currently the same as the number of degrees below zero (8)... well, it's cold. The metal housing of my laptop is freezing my wrists as I type this. That, my "oh-so-oddly-connected-to-me-via-these-recordings-other-human-entity", is f'n cold. REALLY F'N COLD. Hopefully I talk about something...

OMFG! !!!!!! I really don't want to talk about it yet... It still really stings that I could have been this dumb. I thought I had my #*$% together and then BLAMMO!!! This . ^^^^ THIS ^^^^ ... even. And yeah yeah of course... you called it. I'm, embarassingly, already through with AT&T. We didn't even make it a frickin' week! Do you know how disappointed I have to be to almost swear in this dex...

Taking on Snoop Dogg in a 'mano y mano' Battle de Coolness is a poor choice for most men. Well, in my opinion - as stated clearly within - for all men. And women I suppose... although, really, I'd want Grace Kelly's lifetime to think about whether or not I agree with that other gender tack on thought... But for now? Yeah. Yep. Yess'm. Yessir. Yougotit. Yessindeedy. We can go with that. iKudB.Rong...

I try to make up for the past two recordings' lackluster coherence in this effort. And you know what that means... Yep. It means that in the next one I'll be apologizing for the past three recordings while trying to make ammends for, as of yet still, undetected methods of transgression overlooked within this one. So it goes. Right Kurt? iKudB.Rong Episode 28 of 53

I had to do something I've never had to do before - immediately clean up the mess that was the previous recording with this: "wtf follow-up" less than 5 hours after e0238 posted. Bah. Humbug. That last one was borderline incoherent. This one is definitely all the way across the border of coherence... or something like that. iKudB.Rong Episode 27 of 53

I promise there's much less apple sauce love in this one than in my previous recording. So initial impression: it's got that going for it. This is mostly because: who has the time to sing the praises of apple sauce when life is sending you wave after wave of "hells 2 the yeah" moments? Amirite? iRellyKudNotB.Rong... Right? You see me and life... we been gettin' along pretty, pretty, pretty... .......