Intentional Living with Tanya Hale

Perfectionism has, at time, been hailed as a really great thing.  And I'm sure it is. . . at some point in the far distant future!  Having perfectionist tendencies at this stage in our human experience can actually be more detrimental than beneficial.  In fact, perfectionist ideas can keep us stuck in a place we don't want to be.  Let's talk about why.

What would you be willing to pay on Amazon for a happier, more connected relationship?  What would you be willing to pay for more confidence?  More fulfillment?  More engagement with your life?  Would you be willing to pay . . . attention?  Because paying attention to our lives, our minds, our people, is what having a more fulfilling, engaging, connected life will cost.  

A question I get asked a lot is, "What's the difference between coaching and counseling?"  Today, we'll discuss the differences, the similarities, and when you would enlist the services of each. 

Very few of us will want to admit that we sometimes lean toward martyr behavior, but I believe a lot of us exhibit it from time to time, and it's destroying our relationship with ourself and with others. Last week we discussed what being a martyr in a relationship looks like, and this week we're talking more in-depth about 10 ways being a martyr shows up in your life, and 10 ways we can begin to m...

I believe that most of us, at one time or another, have relished in being a martyr. The fascinating thing is, we often do it as a desperate cry to be seen and heard, and what we create is everyone avoiding us so that there is no way we'd be seen or heard. We actually end up destroying the relationships we want so much to be a part of. Today we're talking to you about why we do it, how it shows up,...

If you're someone who has constantly been in the "my weight is not what it should be" mindset, you will love this podcast.  My good friend, and fellow coach, Wendy Lee Johnson will walk you through the basics of intuitive eating and how it differs from dieting in some very significant ways — most notably, the thought work behind it.  And I love that these concepts apply not just to dieting, but al...

Why is it that so many of us have bought into the lie that we're not enough? What does that phrase even mean? What are we not enough of? Who are we not enough for? How does that thought even serve us? It doesn't. It's that simple. Join me today as we talk about this tricky little thought and learn how to get to a place where we truly can believe that we are more than enough.

Have you wondered about life coaching and how it could help you? Today I will share two experiences of how working with my own life coach and using the self-coaching skills I teach you have moved me forward into more of the person I really want to become.    

Want to learn how to be more self-aware?  Let's start with this question, "Why is that?"  Take any behavior you engage in or any feeling you have and ask yourself this question and you will begin to understand yourself more clearly.  You will start to understand yourself in a way that will allow you the clarity necessary to start creating different experiences for yourself if you'd like.  Let's ch...

This can be a tough topic. But we're going to chat today about pornography use from both the user and the spouse today. Both have work to do. Both get to learn how to step out of being a victim and living from fear and choosing instead to step into responsibility and living from love. There is so much hope and empowerment available to all impacted by pornography use.    

We are 11 days into the new year and many of our resolutions are starting to not be so fun. What needs to happen for us to actually accomplish what we want to this year? How do we keep moving forward instead of slowing down and eventually quitting? Managing our thoughts around our goals and being very clear on our reasons and motivations top the list. Let's chat about it.

We live in a society that has a bit of an obsession with being happy. We can often see happiness as our ultimate goal in life, and we strive to be happy with everything we do. But where our culture often views happiness as a place of ease with no struggles or challenges, true happiness is actually something much different. Let's chat today about how we can truly have a happy new year.

Your life consists of so much more than being alive and healthy.  It is actually a gift from God.  What you are, who you are, your strengths and your weaknesses, your likes and dislikes, your dreams and desires are all a gift given to you from Your Creator.  Let's chat today about how we can more fully appreciate our lives and Our God who has gifted us with it.

Part of being a human is that some of the things we think and do are amazing, and some of them can be pretty rotten.  Sometimes we can spend so much energy avoiding and denying the darker parts of us, that we don't grow into the person we were created to become.  Because only in discovering our darkness can we begin to replace it, bit by bit, with the incredible light we have the capacity to becom...

Parenting.  One of the toughest gigs on the planet.  And it the gift that continually keeps giving us discomfort!  Today we discuss all the ways parenting brings us discomfort from the day they're born until today -- and why it's not only okay, but amazing and desirable!  Discomfort is just a feeling, and an opportunity to recognize an opportunity for growth.

Middle-Age is the best time for growing up!  Serious.  We have the experiences and the wisdom at this point in our lives to move forward at an unprecedented rate -- if we want to.  When we take the time to review our lives, our growth and progress, we can start to see just how amazing our paths have been, and will continue to be as we move into our futures.  

So many of us have the beliefs that our works, the things we do or don't do in life, are what creates our worth. In actuality, our works and our worth don't have anything to do with each other. Our worth is not, and never has been negotiable by the things that we do. Add to that the fact that discovering and embracing our worth is the key to really finding fulfillment in life, and we have a topic...

Many of us are so responsible in our lives, but have never really learned how to be emotionally responsible. We continue to blame other people for our feelings, giving others the credit for us being angry or frustrated or annoyed. We also abdicate our emotional responsibility when we expect other people to make us feel happy or loved or empowered. Part of the joy in growing up is realizing that al...

It seems so easy to think that if we change our circumstance that things will get better, and they might, for a very short time.  Eventually we will catch up with circumstance and find ourselves in the same place.  When we learn to change ourselves first and our circumstance second, then we can walk away feeling complete and satisfied.  Let's chat today about loving your circumstance before you le...

We have been taught our whole lives to "fake it till you make it," "just do it," "embrace the suck," and "do the thing you don't want to do." Great phrases for a short-term fix. But if we want to really create lasting change in our lives, we have to stop "white-knuckling" our behaviors and create change from our thoughts rather than from sheer will-power. Let's chat today about how to do that.

The thoughts we think about ourselves are incredibly powerful, because they create everything that we are and everything that we will be.  What thoughts about yourself are going on in your head?  Are those thoughts setting you up for a healthier life?  For better relationships?  If not, it's time to switch out those thoughts for ones that will create a better version of yourself.  Today, we're tal...

The story that we choose to tell ourselves and believe is one of the most powerful choices we can make.  Because every story can be told from many different perspectives, and that makes all the difference in whether we approach our lives from a place of power and learning or a place a victimization and stagnation.  Join me today and I'll show you how this works.

The world we live in is a very uncertain place -- and it always has been.  In this very uncertain world, what can we do to be self-certain?  And just where do I get me some of that self-certainty?  We can never be sure of what tomorrow will bring, but we can be certain that when the struggle is over that we will come out on top, a stronger and healthier version of ourselves.  Let's chat about it.

One of the best ways to start digging deep into ourselves and seeing what's holding us back is to start looking at our motivation for what we do.  And ultimately, always, it comes back to love or fear.  When we're motivated by fear, we destroy.  When we're motivated by love, we create.  Understanding and choosing love as our motivation can help us start creating the life and the relationships that...

So many people have a lot of questions about divorce, the whys and the hows -- and I'm never afraid to answer them even though they are usually hesitant to ask.  So today, I'll share with you some of the most frequently asked questions about how I knew it was the right decision, to my regrets, what I'm grateful for, and also some advice.