Intentional Living with Tanya Hale

Many of us are in the habit of resisting things we can't change, and it creates a lot of unhappiness and havoc in our lives. Byron Katie wrote a book entitled, 'Loving What is', and it presents the concept that when we stop resisting reality, we will find so much more peace in our lives. When we learn to focus on our response and choose to behave in ways that are in alignment with our values, we f...

Learning to 'lean into' our relationships can be a challenge because even in good relationships our primitive brain can feel scared and threatened by the vulnerability required. But when we do choose to lean in, we find greater connection and intimacy and partnership. Here are 15 ways that you can lean in with more intention. Thanks for listening!  Want to learn more about this concept?  Check out...

Leaning into relationships is the process of choosing the relationship over everything else, including our fears and insecurities. It can feel super scary because it requires vulnerability and openness, and this can mean that we may need to courage up and step into discomfort. Because when things in a relationship get tough, it can be super easy to lean out to protect our point of view, our strugg...

Moving into comparison and judgment is such a normal, human thing to do. And we can learn to harness these tendencies to create more of the kind, loving, compassionate relationships we want. Learning to lean into curiosity is a powerful tool to help us stop one-upping and one-downing in our relationships and learn instead to accept and appreciate others as our equals, creating more genuine, deep,...

We all have rich emotional histories spanning our entire lifetime. And every single day these histories are shaping how we show up in the world, how we respond to other people, and how we interpret things that are said and done. When we can start to reveal the thoughts and ideas that are buried beneath our consciousness, we can address how they are impacting our lives today. Join Cathi Antczak, LC...

Do you ever wonder what the best advice is from mid-life coaches? In this podcast I am chatting with two of my great life coach friends, Brooke Onike and Jane Copier, and we are sharing some of the most impactful tools and concepts that we coach our clients on. I think you'll love this one. Thanks for listening!  Want to learn more about this concept?  Check out these podcasts: #88 Marriage Mendin...

When we develop charity, everything in our lives gets better. We develop the capacity to treat others with more kindness and grace, and our self-respect increases as we do so. We live more in alignment with our values and create the ability to truly love. As our charity increases, so does our satisfaction, fulfilment, and joy in life. Charity creates in us the ability to honor the agency of others...

Sometimes, even when we're on our best behavior and doing all the things right to stay in our own lane the other person still doesn't do things the way we want them to, and that can be so frustrating and annoying. And, as a human they get to do it that way. Our job at that point is to learn how to honor and respect their agency to make the choice they want to and figure out how to love more cleanl...

Learning how to stay in your own lane can be tricky because so often what we see as being helpful and kind and of service, is actually getting in someone else's lane. In this podcast we're going to look at over 30 examples of what it looks like to get in other peoples' lanes to help us understand more clearly how tricky it can be and become more aware of and see our own tendencies to stray from ou...

In this episode we explore the idea of staying in your own lane—taking responsibility for your own feelings, choices, and boundaries rather than trying to control or fix others. Though it can be easy to want to be 'helpful', when we invade others' responsibilities we risk creating resentment and undermining intimacy. So let's talk about some practical strategies to stop overstepping, set clear bou...

We all get triggered, it's part of being a human with an imperfect past. That's not the problem. The problem can be figuring out what to do when these moments of being triggered start harming our relationships and breaking down our own self-worth. Learning how to respond to our triggers in healthy ways and address the underlying reasons for the triggers is the work we're discussing here today. Tha...

Research shows that the quality of our lives is dependent on the quality of our relationships. I have learned a lot over the past seven years of coaching clients on difficult relationships and in divorce situations, and today I'm sharing with you my top ten tips for having a better, more fulfilling relationship. They're simple, and yet so many of us overlook these tools. Let's get to work implemen...

Sione and I have been married four years. That seems like such a short time, and yet, I can hardly remember life without him in it. We have had so much to learn about ourselves and about each other and about our relationship, and as always, all of those are constantly evolving. In this podcast Sione joins me in talking about some of the big ah-ha's we have had this last year and how our relationsh...

Humans are wired for connection but our primitive, protective brain often sabotages intimacy, making marriage hard. Each partner brings a personal "story" (adaptive behaviors from childhood) that feels true but can trap us in defensive patterns. Real partnership asks both people to own and clean up their stories, offer grace, and create a safe space for vulnerability. When two people choose growth...

Never let a problem to be solved be more important than a person to be loved."  Problems and familiar processes trigger our primitive brain to rush for quick fixes, but those dopamine hits often cost us relationships. What if we touched base with love first? Slowing down to validate feelings, question our need to be right, and notice resistance to different processes rewires how we show up. Loving...

I believe most of us are living far below our capacity for joy and fulfillment and wholeness. The fear of failure, of the unknown, of being uncertain holds us back from being willing to take a risk and change the trajectory of our lives. But if we want to experience something different, we have to dream something different and then courage up to create it. And it is all up to you. Thanks for liste...

Sometimes it can feel difficult to validate the people we are in relationship with. Validation is an effective way to support others and let them know we see their struggle and that we love them, so how do we approach this when we don't agree with them? It's actually just a matter of learning to validate their feelings rather than their thoughts. Let me show you how this works. Thanks for listenin...

Judging others seems to be as easy for us as breathing air, and yet, when we judge we create an inner turmoil that exacts energy from us and leaves us feeling drained and exhausted. When we can learn to manage our thoughts and step into grace instead of judgment, we will find that we grow into a space of overflow, a place where we feel energized and an abundance of love and compassion. Thanks for...

A decades-long research project has learned that the quality of our lives depends on the quality of our relationships. And what a tragedy that so many of us do not have the tools to create deep, intimate, connected relationships. We have a tendency to hide our true selves behind half-truths, behind saying we're 'fine' when we're not, behind being so amenable and accommodating that we never rock th...

How the world views Mother Eve is how the world views women. Doctrine from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints teaches that Eve was intelligent and courageous, that she understood that partaking of the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil was the only way to put into motion the plan of our Heavenly Parents which allowed each of us to come to earth. So, she is revered and see...

How the world views Mother Eve is how the world views women. Doctrine from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints teaches that Eve was intelligent and courageous, that she understood that partaking of the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil was the only way to put into motion the plan of our Heavenly Parents which allowed each of us to come to earth. So, she is revered and see...

What does it take to create a beautiful and safe relationship? In this episode I am revisiting combining two analogies I've used before, the bucket analogy and the relationship circle, and I'm calling it the Relationship Bucket. How do we fill this bucket up? Who is responsible for filling it? What things will fill it? Is how women fill it different than how men fill it? All of these questions and...

Many of us were taught the idea that relationships are hard. But I have a secret for you. Relationships aren't hard. Keeping your ego in check and behaving kindly rather than harshly is the hard part. When two people prioritize each other, choose to engage and invest in the relationship, show up equally and honestly, and offer each other grace and kindness, relationships are easy. If you're lookin...

Whether it's a spouse, our children, our parents, siblings, friends, or coworkers, we don't have a say in whether or not they choose to love us. And whether they love us or not, it says nothing about us and everything about them. It also doesn't say that they are wrong or bad, just that they are a human with their own preferences and wants and desires, and maybe we're just not a good match for the...

For many of us complaining is just second-nature. It's what we do when we want things to be different or when we want someone to see our struggle. And yet, complaining has a natural byproduct of shutting other people down, especially when the complaint is directed towards them. When we can learn to express our wants and desires in ways other than complaining, we are much more likely to be heard an...