IMPACT: Parenting with Perspective

"Send Ben a text" Daily Habits for Parenting Success Set Your Intention Each Day Last thing before you go to bed, set your intention for the following day.  First thing when you wake up in the morning, remind yourself of and commit to your intention. Here's some examples from my life. Today I will listen with curiosity, patience, and love. Today I will be fun, energetic, and engaged...

"Send Ben a text" Why Is Trust Important To Me? One of the reasons that I've chosen "TRUST" as my word of 2022 is because I often catch myself not trusting myself and others.  One of the things that I've found is that the more I trust myself, the more my business grows.  Another thing I've found is that the more I trust others, the better I feel.  I would rather...

"Send Ben a text" Don't Try To Force The Model On Your Teen One of the most powerful tools that I teach is the Self-Coaching Model!  When I teach it to parents they love it and say it makes total sense. Usually when I teach it to teens the model they love it. But, I've noticed a trend with teens whose parents are coaches or who have coaches.  Oftentimes, these teens tell me, &q...

"Send Ben a text" What's a "Tough" Parenting Moment? Bottom line is, whether or not a parenting moment is " TOUGH" or not is based on your thoughts about the moment.  Tough parenting moments can be anything from a fight with your teen, to broken rules, to letting go and letting your teen make their own mistakes.  If you're like most parents, you've expe...

"Send Ben a text" It's Common to Think Your Not Good Enough We have 60,000 thoughts each day. 85% of those thoughts are negative. 95% of those thoughts are habitual thoughts.  It's okay!  This is part of being human.  You do though, have the power to retrain your brain and develop new thought patterns.  It's natural to think that you are not good enough, but I promise you...

"Send Ben a text" Boundaries Aren't Meant to Control Anyone One of the biggest mistakes I see parents making when it comes to boundaries is when they make a boundary hoping that it will change their teen's behavior.  Anytime you are hoping to change your teen's behavior, that is more of a manual or manipulation than it is a boundary.  Boundaries aren't meant to contro...

"Send Ben a text" Discomfort Sparks Growth Most people who sign up for coaching with me do it because they are experiencing discomfort of some kind.  They want to change something so that they can feel better.  Discomfort isn't a problem, it's just part of the human experience. Discomfort helps us know when something is wrong. Discomfort helps us know that it's time to mak...

"Send Ben a text" Why is Sleep So Important? Sleep is SUPER Important, and yet it's often one of the first things to sacrifice when you're busy or ignore when you're busy.  A lack of sleep has been linked to several physical, mental, and emotional problems.  One of the things that teens that I work with have told me is that they started to feel better when they started sle...

"Send Ben a text" "I Feel Like I'm Losing Control!"  One of the things that I hear the most from parents is, . . .  . . . "I feel like I'm losing control!" The next thing they tell me is, . . . . . . "I don't know what to do!" If you're like most parents, you've probably experienced this before and felt completely out of control and...

"Send Ben a text" Put On YOUR Oxygen Mask FIRST! If you're like most parents, you've been guilty of putting everybody else's needs above your own.  If you're like most parents, you've probably bragged about some of the sacrifices that you've made for your children.  Sacrificing for your loved ones isn't the problem.  The problem is when you take care of...

"Send Ben a text" I Love November!  I love Halloween, which is the day before November.  I love Thanksgiving, and I love when my birthday falls on Thanksgiving.  I love the fall, the leaves, the cool/changing weather, and I love everything about November.  And, I especially love the focus and extra push when it comes to gratitude, appreciation, and giving thanks.  The Power Of Gratitude ...

"Send Ben a text" If You Want to Stop Yelling At Your Teen, Stop Yelling at YOURSELF!  Okay, so this might be a stretch. You probably don't "yell" at yourself out loud, but be honest, how do you speak to yourself on the inside? How often do you "yell" at yourself in your head?  How often do you tell yourself that you're "not good enough", or that y...

"Send Ben a text" Grades Aren't As Important As We've Been Taught When I was getting close to graduating high school, I was told that I wouldn't be able to go to college due to my poor high school GPA (2.0 something) and my poor ACT score (17). For years leading up to my graduation, I was told that I would have to improve my grades if I ever wanted a job other than digging...

"Send Ben a text" Parenting is Hard, and That's Okay! First off, . . .  Go listen to this podcast.  This post will not do it justice! I don't plan out my interviews, so it's I also don't write as detailed a post on my interviews. And, YES, . . .  Parenting can be hard.  I love how Tara mentioned that God gives us hard things to do to help up depend on him. Anytime I&a...

"Send Ben a text" Are You and/or Your Teen Emotionally Healthy? It's unfortunate that when most people refer to "Emotional Health", they are actually referring to the lack of emotional health.  I hear people saying things like, "They have some emotional health issues," or, "They are struggling with emotional health."  But, who actually knows what emotio...

"Send Ben a text" You Can't Stop Thinking! Because you are human, your brain is constantly at work, whether you are awake or asleep, whether you are concentrating or daydreaming, your brain is constantly thinking. The goal of coaching isn’t to turn off your brain or to even control your thoughts. The goal is to be able to be aware of your thoughts and to have the power to manage you...

"Send Ben a text" Do You Know What Your Values Are? If you are like most people, you have a pretty good idea of what your personal values are, but I'm guessing you don't really spend a lot of time thinking about it. Sometimes when I work with teens who think that they have no values.  Everyone has values, but most people don't take the time to identify them or really even...

"Send Ben a text" What If You Were The Perfect Parent? I asked this the other day in one of my Impact Parenting Group calls. This idea of "perfect" parenting kind of shook the zoom room.  There's so much shame around the word "perfect".  Most parents just believe that they aren't perfect and that they aren't good enough.  If you're like most parent...

"Send Ben a text" How To Make Parenting Simple! #1 Define Your Role!  One of the things that makes parenting harder that it needs to be is Not knowing your role! If you don't know what your role, or purpose, is as a parent, everything feels like a battle.  When you don't define your parenting role, you get tossed from one roll to the other.  It's hard to be intentional whe...

"Send Ben a text" Principles of Being a Relationship Hero #1 Be 100% Responsible for YOUR Relationship with Them  If you're like most people, you've blamed your relationship on the other person in the relationship.  "If my teen would . . . " "If they would start . . . " You are responsible for how you feel towards the other person in your relationship. Relat...

"Send Ben a text" Choose to Love! What a pleasure to interview Bonnie Lyman from Bonnie Lyman Coaching!  When I interview people, I like it to be natural and unscripted. So, to be completely transparent, I don't plan out my interviews, which makes it harder to make show notes.  So, if you want to get all of the amazing teachings that Bonnie shared, make sure that you listen to this...

"Send Ben a text" I LOVE Football! First, I want to say that I LOVE football!  It really helped me as a struggling teen, and even as an adult, football plays a beneficial part in my life.  Lessons I've Learned So Far that You Can Use with You and Your Teen! Feedback is important! This is the first year that I've coached with this set of coaches. One of the things that I've...

"Send Ben a text" Stress is Impacting EVERYONE These Days! This DOESN'T Have To Be A Bad Thing! What You and Your Teen Can Do! Here are a few things that you and your teen can try to help you gain some power and control over your stress and anxiety.  Gain some awareness when it comes to stress and anxiety.  Most people avoid feeling stress and anxiety, and because they avoid it, the...

"Send Ben a text" How to Be Intentional With Your Interpretations.  First , you have to be aware of what your interpretations are.  To do this, practice awareness throughout the day. When you notice an interpretation, identify and label it. "This is an interpretation." Thought downloads are also powerful tools to help you identify your interpretations. Any time you find yoursel...

"Send Ben a text" YOU Have the Power to BE the Change Most parents, in fact, most human beings, go around blaming others for things that they want to change.  They position themselves as the victim in life and in the stories they tell themselves.  You have the power to create change, when you are willing to be the change you are looking for. When you stop trying to change others, you cha...