Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life

Sorry this one is late. Today we talk... • Weekends as parents. • 50 day dieting. • The Penguin Files update. • The Lasagne Cocktail. • Pink outfits & cancellations. • Car trouble. • Panini Football Stickers. • Zoe Saldana's stunt double. We also reviewed some of our favourite stories of the week, including... • Uncombable hair syndrome. • Parents going cheap at Christmas. • The 'Soleus Lift'...

Hello! Something a bit different today. We've had so much feedback about the story of the stolen penguin on a school trip, we thought we'd dedicated (at least) an episode to it. Our research has taken us to England, Scotland, Ireland, France, Australia, The United Arab Emirates and even South Korea. We speak to genuine callers and get their first hand accounts of the penguin story. We speak to som...

Another week in review podcast... But first some life bits... • Dubai getting rid of masks. • More school visits. • Covering the breakfast show. • Panini World Cup footy stickers. • Driving lessons & crying. • Bullet Train & Overcooked. • Modern diets vs 30 years ago. • 8 dating red flags. • Loch Ness bulls**t. • Wacky sock fashion. • The Xmas 3 Lions. • Staff-free restaurants. • Phones in...

Hello! Great episode today. We chat to Ian Sanders, creator of The Real Brits in Dubai Facebook page. With almost 12,000 members in just four years, we delved into the highs and lows, the pitfalls and perils, the laughs and the tears of running an expat Facebook page which, we're sure you're all aware, can be absolute minefields of trolling, arguing and pig-headedness. However, there are also as m...

It's the end of the week as we know it... And we feel... Well, knackered. As usual. On today's podcast, we started with some life bits: • Swimming pool knobhead. • Diet news. • The skin tag gun (trigger warning - very gross). • Mummy Mafia in the schoolyard. • The emoji response. We also reviewed some of the week's lesser-publicised stories... • The School of Kanye West. • Loud sex fines. • Walnut...

Hello! lots to talk about today before we get to the Holiday Diaries in the second half. Today we cover... • Kids being off school, upsetting your routine. • Simon's "Catboy Talks Funny" side project. • A 36 year old sex education question. • No-hands knobheads. • Statey Funez shout-outs. • School distractions feedback. • Holiday Diaries (Amsterdam stopover & Calshot). A massive thank you to t...

Hello! Well, this episode was going to be another travel diaries segment but we got into the content, so we've pushed the next travel diaries episode back to later in the week. Today is Queen Elizabeth II's funeral so we've taken a day off to watch it. On the podcast, we're talking: • A solo argument about republicans & the bank holiday. • The QE2 anniversary & Lorra's memories. • Simon's...

Hello and congratulations on making it through another week of life without (if your week's been anything like ours) murdering someone, having a heart attack, giving your children enough mental damage to require years of therapy or driving your stupid car into a stupid wall. On today's episode we delve into the news you might have missed this week... Some of it fun... Some of it helpful... And som...

Hello! After a big argument yesterday, we haven't spoken for a day, so we thought we'd get on the mics! Big one today. Among other things, the first half of the pod features... • Swimming & a possible affair. • Posh people showering. • Toe-nail cutting cut-off. • Simon falling in a school. • Lorra's car park shenanigans. • A sexy fridge fix. • A superglue success story. • King Charles and pens...

Hello! This is the first of our brand new ;End of the Week Review' episodes. A look back at happenings and stories that have caught our eye. This week... • Class parent WhatsApp groups at school (with your voice notes). • Middle-aged night wees and men doing 'the emergency pinch'. • The cost of school residential trips. • The return of the Teletubbies. • Parent rules from a very strict headteacher...

Hello! To follow on from Thursday night's podcast, when we had just heard the shocking news of Queen Elizabeth's death, the first half of our recording today is our feelings since then... When it started to hit us properly, how Simon had to change the format of his radio show, how difficult it is to do that job on days when you don't want to act like an 'idiot monkey' (Simon's words). We talk abou...

This is an unusual episode, which we recorded more for ourselves than anything else. Like everyone else, we watched the News today but tonight we were hosting one of our weekly quiz nights when the sad announcements were made regarding the Queen. It was difficult because we were stood there with microphones and, to be honest, we didn't know how to feel or react. History was being made. But we had...

Hello! We uploaded ep.110 yesterday but there was a glitch in the audio and we sounded like Norman Collier doing his broken mic routine ( this ), so we had to delete it and do it again. This podcast is in two halves. The first half is us, now, talking about the first week back to school, the Dubai school runs, community Facebook groups, Lorra's weekend meltdown, Simon's husbandly reaction to the m...

This is the third time we've tried to upload this episode and, to be quite frank, it's ruined our afternoon! Here are the first parts of our holiday diaries, taking in the flying, London, the New Forest, Southampton & Amsterdam. Apologies for any "category b" words that might have slipped-in (can't quite remember now). Episode 2 of the travel diaries will be coming soon. See you next time x Su...

Hello! We've been away. The holiday pods are coming. They won't be daily, like last year but we did record in several countries, talking about where we've been and what we've been up to. So they'll be coming soon. For now, we talk about... • Needing a holiday buffer • BeReal - The anti-Instagram • The kids not appreciating the holiday • Our thoughts on the new Game of Thrones prequel, House of the...

On Episode 107 of #HAWSTL (Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life) the hot topics are Dubai's inclement weather (we disagree about this), deliveries (we disagree on certain orders), an invention for middle-aged men in middle-aged cars, friends who are leaving, bad people at great comedy nights, the kids being useless, the staggering number of glasses one uni student thinks it's fine to have in his r...

A meandering flight of the Simon & Lorra wafflecopter, landing at various destinations, including... • Illness & top-wife behaviour. • The Hatta visa run. • Dating apps (Tinder & Hinge). • Kid-induced stress. • Hating other people's kids and why they might hate ours. • Travelling, airports & luggage. • A geographical riddle. We also recommended... The Phantom of the Open - [Click f...

Hello you! And Happy Father's Day! Today we're talking about... • Lorra's stress levels. • Car AC armpit cooling. • School Summer finishing time. • Shorts problem for women. • Local clothes envy. • Back of thigh lady-hairs. • Old-age boozeless hangovers. • Male/female roles for kids. • A rough week for our youngest. • New teacher day. • Trampoline park disaster. • Saturday night hospital visit. •...

Hello you!!! Sorry for the pause in pods but as you'll hear, it's been a bit of a mad old time. Coming up we're talking... • Simon's crazy TikTok figures. • The Amber Heard poo prank. • Quizzing. • Being broke. • Car troubles. • House troubles. • Takeaway trauma. • The f***ing fridge! We also review Top Gun Maverick, Keep sweet Pray & Obey and Adam Sandler's Hustle. Don't forget.if you're in D...

After it took three 'takes' to record the last podcast, Simon (mega-frustrated that his expensive wireless mics were 'playing silly buggers') wanted to test the mics on a drive. So we did. Apologies for car noise but we thought we'd put it out anyway. Today we talked about the fun news that we're getting evicted, IBS, our kids on a downer, the pitfalls of a takeaway living room massage, a kitchen...

It took three takes to get this one in the bag, because Rode's Wireless mics are about as reliable as bus timetables in the 80s. Today we talk the truth about most kids, a really bad idea from Simon, other people's family social media posts, our weekly live events, watching stand-up comedy, an exams rant, Leo being back and boys/men not discussing their feelings. If you'd like to know more about o...

Hello and first of all, apologies for the time since our last episode. We have both been itching to get back in the studio and record but have been terribly busy with all manner of life admin, some of which we'll no doubt waffle-on about in an upcoming episode. We have two new weekly events happening in Dubai, as discussed on the intro today... First of all, we are hosting a weekly Sunday Family B...

To celebrate the centenary of our little podcast, Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life, we've done something special. We invited our son, Leo, in for a chat before he heads back to university in Bristol in a couple of days. We start with a couple of anecdotes that we've held back on telling each other. Then we get into the funny, emotional, honest and sometimes awkward chat with Leo. A lot of you...

Hello hello! On today's wafflecopter, we talk about... • Simon still having his shoes on 5 hours after getting home from work. • Lorra grafting. • Lorra's 'Goodfella's wives at a BBQ' outfit. • Our son arriving from uni in the UK. • Tonnes of DIY before he gets here. • Our youngest and the Mumiso(?) shop. • Bad Cinderella song covers. • Our thoughts on watching 'The Batman' & 'Bad Guys'. • The...

Hello! On today's STILL NOT 30 MINS episode of 'Husband & Wife Sentenced to Life' podcast we talk about... • Having an empty house tonight. • The Batman. • The cinema vs home movies. • Our kids getting smashed on coffee. • Adventure Park & vomitting. • Last night's memorial to a lost friend. • Lorra's fringe issue. • Lorra's tipping nightmare. We also recommended/reviewed a couple of thing...