Handing the Shame Back

Self Talk Mood changes are common for survivors to feel.  It's important to become aware that their mood hasn't suddenly changed out of nowhere; the self talk they are doing will be the reason. This will instantly impact the mood and needs attention. The self talk they use can sometimes be quite devastating and unkind. Gently encourage them to notice it a little more and provide encourag...

Meet Cheryl Hunter - Part 2 Author and Media Expert who helps others share, Cheryl shares her very powerful and public story and her linking of Wabi-Sabi (which encourages us to recognise the beauty in simplicity, authenticity and imperfection), to herself. You can reach Cheryl on  Instagram: @HunterCheryl Facebook: @CherylHunter Twitter: @HunterCheryl HELP NZ    Sexual Harm Helpline, 0800 044 334...

Being Captive This term often takes people to visions of being trapped physically. Although this does happen, what is far more common and likely to happen is us doing this to ourselves!! By that I refer to being held captive by our minds and thoughts.  We can break this cycle with some dedicated focus and practical tips to follow. This is a game changer! Go to our website (see below) for more info...

Meet Cheryl Hunter - Part 1 Author and Media Expert who helps others share, Cheryl was raped as a teenager at 14, then kidnapped at 18 years of age and reveals, for the first time publicly, what happened when she was a small child of 6. She has a very powerful and real breakthrough, which has the potential to help survivors everywhere. Respect. You can reach Cheryl on  Instagram: @HunterCheryl Fac...

Survivors, We often consider that what keeps us imprisoned is not just what happened to us but how other people then treat us. What if I was to tell you that it is your own mind holding you captive, that the thoughts you have can keep you trapped and less than? Have a good listen here, I think this blog will speak to you. Go to our website (see below) for more information on our foundation Donate...

Meet Paul Hutchinson Executive Producer of The Sound of Freedom movie and founder of Liberating Humanity. Paul shares his personal experience of being involved in over 70 rescue missions across 15 countries of child sex trafficked children. What he has seen and done, plus the powerful impact this movie has had across the world is incredible. You can find Paul on: https://instagram.com/liberating.h...

Breaking the Chain This is linked to Paul Hutchinson's interview held earlier this week, and listed across social media platforms. Survivors, when you are feeling triggered, anxious, or unsafe, stop what you are doing and give it attention. Find a way to release it, so you don't stay trapped and stuck. It may be as simple as texting a friend, or reaching out for a hug from your loved one...

Meet Paul Hutchinson Executive Producer of the Sound of Freedom movie and founder of Liberating Humanity. Paul shares his personal experience of being involved in over 70 rescue missions across 15 countries of child sex trafficked children. What he has seen and done, plus the powerful impact this movie has had across the world is incredible. You can find Paul on: https://instagram.com/liberating.h...

Welcome to this Weekly update: On the show we have Paul Hutchinson Executive Producer of The Sound of Freedom movie. This focuses on the hideous crime of child sex trafficking. Not only did Paul help produce this movie, he was also personally involved in 70 rescue missions across 15 countries. What he has to share about this is mind blowing. The associated  survivor tip is on Breaking the Chain, ...

Being Believed Survivors,  One of the hallmarks of being a survivor can come with the experience of not being believed. This appears in many forms but usually begins with  Are you Sure? He or She seemed so nice. This leads to feelings of confusion, fear and sometimes anger. All are valid. I wish survivors speaking out came with a clause that whoever they shared this with had to accept and believe...

Being Believed This is linked to Donna's interview held this month and listed across social media platforms. Being believed is really powerful for your survivor. It helps to give validation, builds more of a sense of who they are, alongside confidence. Make sure you are proud and show tit through:  a gift, or doing something special for them (use any of the 5 love languages to show your pride...

Welcome to this Weekly update: On the show we have my blog on Being Believed, to my mind the most powerful experience a survivor can have, listen as to why this is the case. We also have my tip for supporting survivors which is on Being Believed. This has A Huge Impact on Survivors. All of this, and more can be found on all our social media platforms @handingtheshameback as well as our website and...

Your Legacy This is linked to Kristi McVee's interviews held earlier this week, and listed across social media platforms. Survivors, you can end up working in environments doing the EXACT work you wish had been done when you were suffering through the worst of the abuse. Legacy's can creep in unbidden: EG One survivor not being aware she had been abused, had spent her working life involv...

Welcome to Part 2 Speaker. Author. Ex-child Abuse Detective and Specialist Child Interviewer She was abused at 6, and told her grandma who immediately contacted her father. He came and got her and she was never taken back. Kristi believes that CSA is worse than murder as entire lives have been destroyed and the impact casts a shadow over the whole lifetime. Compare this with murder: once it is don...

Meet  Kristi McVee   Speaker. Author. Ex-child abuse detective and specialist child interviewer  She was abused at 6, and told her grandma who immediately contacted her father. He came and got her and she was safe from that point on. She completely blocked her memories of this, and they only surfaced once she had left the police and her daughter turned 6. You can reach her through her website at w...

Welcome to this Weekly update: On the show we have Kristi McVee  Speaker. Author. Ex-child abuse detective and specialist child interviewer  She was abused at 6, blocked it, told grandma who told dad. He instantly removed her from the abuser's environment. Her memories surfaced once she had left the police and her daughter turned. 6. The associated  survivor tip is on the Legacy we leave as s...

Being Believed This is linked to Donna Bulatowicz interviews held earlier this week, and listed across social media platforms. This is one of the most powerful, if not the most powerful experience a survivor can have. Being Believed helps to reduce the trauma because you feel vindicated and validated. It also helps decrease the shame, and encourages further disclosure, which leads to wanting to he...

Meet Donna Bulatowicz - Part 2 Teacher. Writer. Survivor. As a young girl, Donna was abused by another girl for several years, and then by a teacher when she was 9.  In this 2nd part, Donna shares what helped her recovery and healing: Physically moving away from the area, and becoming a teacher, using writing, were part of it. She recognises that  becoming the adult she most needed when she was a...

Meet Donna Bulatowicz - Part 1 Teacher. Writer. Survivor. As a young girl, Donna was abused by another girl for several years, and then by a teacher when she was 9. This was to go on for 3 years. When she finally told her parents and school counsellor, she was Instantly believed. The police, however, did not believe her, the reason given: Because 'A Woman wouldn’t molest a child'! You ca...

Welcome to this Weekly update: On the show we have Donna Bulatowicz who is a teacher, writer and survivor. She was abused by another child for several years, then again by a teacher for 3 years between the ages of 9 - 12. There are some shocking twists to this story. The associated  survivor tip is on Being Believed and the impact this had on her.  All of this, and more can be found on all our soc...

Happy New Year Everyone We haven't forgotten you! We are having a well deserved break and preparing an amazing line up for you. We will commence streaming on Monday 15th January. Don't miss out!! Love to all #handingtheshameback #handsign4kids #survivors We are on all social media platforms: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HandingtheShameBack Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/handi...

Admitting Abuse This is linked to Stuart Lord's interviews held earlier this week, and listed across social media platforms. When an abuser admits what they did, the reaction you have may surprise you. Initially you just need to breathe, as you will be in shock: understandable, as you were conditioned to never speak of it. Please allow yourself to feel what you need to: This could be anger, s...

Meet Stuart Lord - Part 2 Survivor. Educator. Social Justice Advocate Stuart is the founder of the boy scouts survivor group of America,  and from the age of 11, was abused by his Scout Leader, among others. He believes that when His abuser  admitted the abuse, he felt 100 pounds lighter. What helped his recovery was  largely Self-Care and Self-Compassion, and that practising it daily brought huge...

Meet Stuart Lord - Part 1 Survivor. Educator. Social Justice Advocate Stuart is the founder of the boy scouts survivor group of America,  and from the age of 11, was abused by (among others) people within the boy scouts of America executive team. His main abuser eventually admitted the abuse, after decades, and what transpired next,  is phenomenal. You can reach Stuart on https://www.drstuartlord....

Weekly updates on the channel delivered fresh to your door. This week on our YT Channel is Stuart Lord who is the founder of the boy scouts survivor group of America,  and who was abused by (among others) people within the executive team. His main abuser eventually admitted the abuse, after decades, and what transpired next,  is phenomenal.  The associated  survivor tip is on how to deal with a pr...