Good Vanilla

Food anxiety once had me sitting at a table with pizza in front of me — frozen in fear and refusing to eat. The question was asked, “What’s wrong with pizza?” And in that moment, I realized how loud my anxiety had become. In this episode, I share three simple, practical steps that helped me feel safe around food again. These are tools you can use in the moment when fear shows up — to slow your tho...

For years, an eating disorder ran my life. I smiled at dinner tables while starving inside. I planned restriction, counted calories, and punished myself with exercise. It was loud. Demanding. A full-time job. And it pulled me far from God. In today’s episode, I share why your relationship with God matters before you can truly heal from an eating disorder. We’ll talk about: Why you were created for...

Hi Friend! We've been told comparison is the enemy—but what if it doesn't have to be? In this episode, I'm sharing a powerful mindset shift that helps you see comparison differently and use it as a tool instead of a trigger in eating disorder recovery. You'll learn: Why comparison shows up How your interpretation of it is a choice How to stop it from spiraling into shame   If comparison has ever l...

Hey there friend! If the word control feels triggering or exhausting, you’re not alone. For many women in eating disorder recovery, control has been used against them — leaving it feeling like the enemy. In today’s episode, we’re reframing control through a hope-driven, faith-based lens and exploring how reclaiming control in a healthy way actually helps you take the power back from the eating dis...

Let's normalize talking about tough topics with our daughters. They deserve to have awareness about mental health conditions like eating disorders. Our girls need to have the tools to spot trouble brewing in their own minds and the minds of their friends. I love this conversation I had with my 9 year old daughter, Ava, because it proves such conversations don't have to be miserable. The serious ca...

I love how honest this conversation is! Brittni Clarkson, host of Meant To Bloom podcast and I don’t hold back sharing so much of what we’ve learned over the years of our personal mental health journeys. Mental health is arguably the most important aspect of health. So we dove deep into topics such as but not limited to: A gratitude practice that actually works Obsession with self-development The...

Faith isn’t talked about enough in the recovery space. This is why I’m here, friend. To spread this message and help you open your heart so God has access to your heart. You don’t need to hide any shame and guilt from him. Because you are worthy. Ephesians chapter 6 is a powerhouse of a chapter to use to fight for your life. You are worth it friend! Do not give up. Listen to this episode to get yo...

Is an eating disorder making you work for EVERYTHING? Working to change or maintain your body. Working to earn food. Working to accept yourself. Sweet friend, it’s time to set yourself free with a heavy dose of GRACE!  In this episode I explain how to apply Ephesians 2: 8-10 to your recovery. You will learn how to stop trying to be “enough” by being “better” or “healthier” than other people. You d...

My 9 year old daughter, Ava, is back as a guest and she brought her wit and wisdom! Again! I swear this girl needs her own show. In this episode, Ava and I discuss how your exercise habits (or lack thereof) can affect your daughter. We also talk about noticing your beliefs about exercise and why it’s important to continue an exercise routine even if you have an eating disorder. And how working out...

Stop making an eating disorder all about you. It sucks to hear this, but you need to hear me out. The eating disorder isn’t only running your life, it’s also impacting the lives of the people in your life. If you’re a girl momma and trying to change your relationship with food, this episode is for you. If you think you can hide your food struggles from your daughter, think again. Kids are so perce...

Holy crap this is a good one! While recording this episode I had my own emotional realization at the end. So get ready for a deep dive into your soul. Let's start with a truth bomb: restrictions are a symptom of unworthiness. And eating disorders are ways to maximize restrictions in life. Restrictions are sneaky by letting you believe you’re in control. But restrictions actually control you, frien...

Do you feel like you can’t “do” mental health? Like it’s too complicated, too much work and seemingly impossible to achieve the positive changes you desire? In this episode, my friend and transformative health coach for moms over 40, Erin Vogt and I share an honest conversation about our mental health struggles and how it was the simplest solutions that got each of us unstuck. As Erin says in this...

If food rules and body comparisons consume your thoughts, it could be a sign God is trying to get your attention and teach you something. Join my 9 year old daughter, Ava, and me in this episode as we discuss the connection of our relationship with God to our relationship with our physical and mental health. Press play and inspire your faith by listening to one of God’s young children share her li...

If there ever was a hot topic, the discussion around people casually or rather obviously mentioning another’s weight is definitely one of them. In the awkward efforts of “small talk”, conversations are typically surface deep. This leaves our hair, clothes and the way we look open for discussion. Unless you dangle a “closed” sign on your neck, someone is bound to compliment your appearance. This ca...

What do you think a 9 year old can teach you about body image? Recently I began a conversation with my daughter, fully intending to educate her about body acceptance and positivity but she ended up teaching me a lesson. I was so grateful for her honesty because it was through her voice and perception as a 9 year old little girl that I realized I had unresolved childhood emotions about my body. And...

How do you help your daughter love her body when you have your own complicated relationship with your body image? Or maybe you’re trying to heal from an eating disorder while supporting your child in her body acceptance. The truth is, no one can trigger you like your own child. When your kid says something that calls out your own insecurities, how can you possibly remain emotionally available? Wha...

Do you know yourself? If someone asked you what you do for fun, what would you say? Don’t feel bad if your response is a clueless stammer. I get it, I’ve been caught off guard, too. Consider this episode an opportunity to question, to be curious and inspire you to relentlessly pursue who God created you to be. When you allow yourself to live aligned with your God-given identity, joy is yours. As y...

Too bold? If you think so, I recorded this especially for you. It’s the kick in the butt you need to shift your mindset around the ways you allow an eating disorder to influence your life. In this episode I share two lessons I’ve learned as a result of being tested by an eating disorder. Interestingly enough, by speaking two blessings out loud, two more blessings popped into my mind while recordin...

Have you ever been mad at God? Have you ever questioned the way God created you? When I was a young kid, I thought God messed up when He made me. I was mad at Him because He didn’t make me skinny like my friends. And now 30 years later I understand why God made me the way I am. In this episode, you’ll learn how a revisitation of your challenges in childhood can prepare you to be the person God cre...

Your most valuable player in your healing journey is sitting on the sidelines, avoiding your eye-contact. And only you can see her. Because she is you. A version of you as a young child, known as your inner child. In truth, you’ve been avoiding her, too. Maybe because you weren’t aware she was there. Or maybe because you know she knows things. Painful things you were hoping to forget. I need you t...

Your level of loyalty is commendable. But your commitment is blinding you from seeing the truth. There’s a relationship you have to tell to take a hike. At least until that “someone” no longer weighs your self-worth the way they do now. In this episode, I’ll prepare you for your favorite break-up of all time. Press play. Liberation awaits!     

Oh dang! Is today one of those days when no matter how many positive affirmations you say, you don’t feel good in your skin? Don’t stress a moment longer contemplating how you’ll possibly overcome your mental exhaustion and choose the perfect next step to magically feel better. Release the pressure of always needing to figure it out. All you need to do is take a deep breath, say a prayer and liste...

Scrolling on social media got you feeling down? Or maybe you’re feeling inferior after seeing someone who looks like they’ve got it ALL figured out. I’m gonna have to politely ask you to stop and listen to this episode before your thoughts run away with your sanity. You’ll learn a quick, “get unstuck” mindset shift that’ll take you from wishing you were like “them”, to thanking God for the ways He...

Are you obsessive? Are you perfectionistic? Good! I’m not kidding. It is possible to use your “negative” personality traits to heal your relationship with your body and food. In this episode, you’ll learn how to identify what parts of your personality are currently keeping you stuck in your healing journey and how you can shift the way you use these same traits and use them for good. Let’s dive in...

 Have you ever wondered why you have an eating disorder? Do you feel the heat of shame when it feels so hard to be around food? Blame and shame are the stars of the game when it comes to eating disorders. And our poor personalities are punished with thoughts like, If I wasn’t so stupid. Why do I have to be this way? Why can’t I just figure out how to be happy? Everyone else knows what they’re doin...