From Crisis to Connection - with Geoff & Jody Steurer

For your FREE ticket to the online Betrayal Healing Conference April 10th-14th, or to upgrade to an All-Access pass, please visit: https://gsteurer--betrayalhealing.thrivecart.com/all-access-pass/ If broken trust is an issue in your relationship, download the FREE video series “The First Steps to Rebuilding Trust” to help you get on the right track. https://www.geoffsteurer.com/freebie During the...

A crucial developmental step in adulthood is differentiating from your first family; taking the things that worked from your childhood and leaving behind what didn’t, as you become the adult (or parent) you choose to become. In today’s episode we discuss the importance of these conversations between parents and their adult children. We discuss the balance between seeking acknowledgment from the pa...

If broken trust is an issue in your relationship, download the FREE video series “The First Steps to Rebuilding Trust” to help you get on the right track. https://www.geoffsteurer.com/freebie We encounter food and eating more often than most other activities in our lives, yet it can be one of the most contentious rituals we participate in. In this episode we are pleased to welcome Emily Fonnesbeck...

Healing from addictive and compulsive behaviors is a long road that often includes returning to old problematic behaviors. As disappointing and hurtful as it is for both the recovering partner and the betrayed partner, it is vital that the conversation around what happened is done with honesty, accountability, and compassion for the betrayed partner. In this episode we discuss the harmful effects...

The invention of modern-day conveniences have lowered our workloads and increased our free time to spend doing other important work. One thing they have tremendously changed is the need for families to work together doing both simple and more complex daily tasks to thrive as a family. In this episode we discuss the research behind the importance of working together as families and how that can sha...

Most of us can describe what it means to be physically safe, or to provide physical safety for another person. But are we able to understand and provide emotional safety for our partner? The water can get murky around this topic, so in this episode we dive in to further understand emotional safety and the impact on relationships, especially after a betrayal. It is important to note that emotional...

Today we discuss anger from the viewpoint of women, specifically betrayed partners. We dive into societal stereotypes about how women are perceived when they express anger, and how that can be damaging to their internal regulation of emotions. Using anger as a tool to determine actions, reactions, and boundaries is necessary, the key is how to process it and move forward in a healthy manner. ...

Through his extensive research and experience as a clinical psychologist, Dr. Adam Fisher joins us to discuss conflict patterns that couples fall into in their relationships. These patterns are the roles that individuals take on, not to be confused with their personalities. In recognizing these patterns, couples can better understand how to come together to resolve conflict. This is the continuati...

As Valentine’s Day quickly approaches, now is a great time to check in on your relationship. On a holiday that can sometimes feel over-produced on TV and in social media, it’s important to stay honest with where your relationship is at. Whether you’ve just discovered a betrayal, are moving forward after betrayal, or have never dealt with a similar trauma, today we discuss the importance of staying...

The beginning of a relationship can be a time of discovering all of the ways in which you are drawn to your partner because of your similarities. The truth, however, is that there will be as many areas you differ in as you are the same. Sorting through these differences and honoring them, while staying unified as a couple, can increase the richness of the relationship while deepening your own iden...

Children undoubtedly require a massive amount of time and energy. Too often parents slowly fall into a child-centered marriage and the marriage relationship itself is put on the back burner. In this episode we discuss the need for a marriage-centered marriage. Doing so creates the optimal secure, healthy environment for children as they grow and learn relationship skills of their own. If broken tr...

It is understandable that someone who has betrayed their partner often has their own past hurts and issues they need to address and heal. However, how is this supposed to happen when the focus needs to be turned to healing the betrayed partner's pain? Today we discuss this dynamic and how the betrayer can hold space for their partner to heal while also tending to their own wounds.  If broken...

We know that those who struggle with addiction suffer in their own way, but how much compassion should the betrayed partner feel for them? One of the members of our private Connection Plus community asked this very question and we wanted to share our response to them here on our podcast. While compassion often comes to us easily in a variety of circumstances, it's a lot more complicated to access...

A common reaction in hearing about a pornography addiction is wondering if something is “off” in the marriage, and especially in the bedroom. This assumption shifts the responsibility of the pornography addiction onto the betrayed partner and will create further damage. In this episode we discuss the harmful effects of this line of thinking, along with why a pornography addiction really isn’t abou...

In the aftermath of a sexual betrayal discovery, the most common reaction is to freeze and not know how to proceed. Dealing with such an explosive disruption to life can feel paralyzing and confusing to every part of our emotional, mental, and physical senses. In today’s episode we discuss the first crucial steps in beginning the journey to heal. https://sal12step.org/ If broken trust is an issue...

In this episode, we tackle the challenging dynamic of how betrayal can turn a marriage into a parent/child arrangement. A balanced partnership is the goal for most couples with each individual carrying their share of responsibilities, supporting the other, and being a reliable second half. Couples going through betrayal issues will often have one partner over-functioning and the other under-functi...

In a culture where being vulnerable can be seen as weakness, and accepting help can be seen as being a burden, how do we learn to advocate for ourselves? When we haven’t learned how to ask for what we really need or want, we can often turn to unhealthy choices and patterns to fill the void. Today we discuss how resisting help from others can keep us from true connection and intimacy. If broken tru...

Healing from trauma, rebuilding relationships, and finding inner peace can often be a long, uphill battle. It can be easy to feel burned out or defeated in the baby steps we need to take during that process. Finding patience during our journey and recognizing just how important those micro adjustments are can give us the boost we need to keep going. I f broken trust is an issue in your relationshi...

Life is full of situations that are out of our control. Once we have recovered from the initial shock of what has happened, how do we proceed? Do we continue to live as if we are powerless? Or do we make choices that we can control to heal and move forward? We have to be accountable and conscious with how we respond to what happens to us. Today we discuss the victim mindset and how that is often a...

Our relationships, especially committed ones like marriage, give us the opportunity to influence and be influenced. We may value and prioritize many of the same things, but we will also have areas that are not congruent with our partner’s values. In those times, how do we react? Today we discuss the difference between trying to motivate and influence our partner in a healthy manner, and trying to...

Each of us have areas of our lives where we are naturally motivated, disciplined, and focused. In contrast, we also have areas that are not as important to our core values, or that we struggle to prioritize. Today we discuss extrinsic vs. intrinsic motivation and how those shape and evolve throughout our lives, especially through our relationships with others.  For details on our new Connecti...

Have you ever wondered what motivates you to make good decisions, work hard, or put effort into the important areas of your life? Have you wondered the most effective way to motivate others around you, especially your children? Today we start a 3-part discussion on Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic motivation and how one can often influence the other.  Today we begin a new format for this podcast. Hope...

We are thrilled to introduce Connection Plus , a one-of-a-kind community to give you direct support from us. This is our exclusive community for couples and individuals who want to maintain their recovery momentum and strengthen their relationships.  If you have been impacted by: Betrayal trauma Marriage/family conflict Compulsive sexual behaviors Abuse Infidelity Extended family drama …then...

If broken trust is an issue in your relationship, download the FREE video series “The First Steps to Rebuilding Trust” to help you get on the right track.  https://www.geoffsteurer.com/freebie For details on our Connection Plus Membership Community, please visit  https://www.connectionpluscommunity.com Sign up for my FREE  weekly newsletter  to stay up-to-date on exciting new a...

If broken trust is an issue in your relationship, download the FREE video series “The First Steps to Rebuilding Trust” to help you get on the right track.  https://www.geoffsteurer.com/freebie For details on our Connection Plus Membership Community, please visit  https://www.connectionpluscommunity.com Sign up for my FREE  weekly newsletter  to stay up-to-date on exciting new a...