Fragmented to Whole: Life Lessons from 12 Step Recovery

Send us Fan Mail Before recovery, I had heard all about the importance of acceptance, but my question still remained: How do I do it? It wasn’t just one thing that helped me but a series of lessons that helped me change my thinking, reduce emotional suffering, and create inner peace. And I wanted to share those lessons with you. This week’s episode 309 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about h...

Send us Fan Mail Regardless of how long I have been working with clients as a boundaries coach, I am still amazed by the mind-blowing revelations my clients have as a result of working with me. Today, I am sharing one of these profound experiences by sharing a story from “Sylvia,” one of my clients who confidently took back ownership of her life. This week’s episode 308 of the Fragmented to Whole...

Send us Fan Mail One of the most profound things I have worked on in my recovery journey is showing love to myself even after I make a mistake. So, when I had a recent experience where my unconditional love was tested after a slip-up with food, I had to share it with you. This week’s episode 307 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about discovering unconditional love after a food slip! In this e...

Send us Fan Mail For years, I thought emotional unavailability happened to me, not something I actively participated in. Spoiler alert: I was dead wrong. Today, I'm pulling back the curtain on my journey from emotional unavailability to emotional availability and how recovery helped me understand and embrace my own feelings and the feelings of others. This week’s episode 306 of the Fragmented...

Send us Fan Mail One of the promises of ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families) is that we go from being a reactor to an actor in our lives. This means taking a proactive approach to our lives rather than reacting to what is happening. It means that we are being thoughtful, giving conscious consideration to what's going on around us, and making conscious decisions instea...

Send us Fan Mail Changes in medicine, technology, currency, and so much more are happening at an exponential rate, and our ability to adapt is either going to make or break us. If you're able to adapt, you'll be able to thrive instead of just surviving or existing. That’s where the concept of adaptation energy comes into play. This week’s episode 304 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is...

Send us Fan Mail Codependency in relationships can be a complex cycle to break, especially when it comes to family members. We tend to tolerate toxic behaviors for the sake of love and loyalty. That’s why today I wanted to unpack some of the myths around loyalty and tolerance in dysfunctional family dynamics and how true love requires setting healthy boundaries. This week’s episode 303 of the Frag...

Send us Fan Mail I recently heard a parable about a Zen farmer and how we perceive “good luck” vs. “bad luck.” I wanted to share it on the podcast this week because I think it reflects such an important mindset shift for how we view life’s unexpected twists and turns. This week’s episode 302 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about lessons from a Zen farmer- the truth about luck.  In this episo...

Send us Fan Mail If you’re anything like me, you have used food, substances, or other people to numb your feelings. That’s why reconnecting with your feelings is a crucial step in recovery. Today, I will be reading some excerpts from ACA’s “Loving Parent Guidebook” that offer helpful insights on the importance of understanding and honoring your feelings. This week’s episode 301 of the Fragmented t...

Send us Fan Mail We learn in recovery that the reason we continue to carry the message of recovery is that, yes, we want other people to recover. Still, first and foremost, we carry the message to continue recovering ourselves. So, for my 300th podcast episode, I wanted to reflect on my journey from numbing myself to finding freedom through recovery and how continuing to share the message of recov...

Send us Fan Mail As I am nearing another massive milestone in my podcasting journey (300 episodes!), I wanted to go back and share the origin story of how I grew from a fragmented, lost person in recovery to an entrepreneur, boundaries coach, and podcast host sharing my experiences and lessons with the world. This week’s episode 299 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about why I started sharing...

Send us Fan Mail As young people, we are often taught refusal skills as it relates to saying no to drugs, alcohol, or unwanted sexual advances. Recovery has taught me that refusal skills are not just for the realm of substance use or sexual behavior. If we’re learning how to set boundaries, refusal skills are an essential part of it. This week’s episode 298 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is ab...

Send us Fan Mail Learning how to be accepting of myself and others was one of the most important things I learned in recovery. I have made several episodes on the life-changing impact of this acceptance, and today, I wanted to continue that by sharing the long-term impact of being accepting of the people, places, and circumstances of your life. This week’s episode 297 of the Fragmented to Whole Po...

Send us Fan Mail The practice of keeping a daily gratitude journal has had such a considerable impact on my life that I now make a gratitude list both morning and night. I’ve found that the benefit of creating this list is that you have to search for things to be grateful for. You almost become wired to look for things to be grateful for in every moment, shifting your perspective to focus on the p...

Send us Fan Mail As we know, boundaries are essential for our well-being, but communicating them effectively can be a challenge. Last week on the podcast, I shared the importance of mastering communication to create healthy relationships. As a continuation of that, I wanted to share my tips for how to clearly communicate our boundaries with others. This week’s episode 295 of the Fragmented to Whol...

Send us Fan Mail Before getting into recovery, I thought that I was a good communicator. While that may have been the case when it came to my work, I came to realize that interpersonally, I was actually a horrible communicator. This week’s episode 294 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to master communication, avoid conflict, and create healthier relationships! Some of the talking poi...

Send us Fan Mail Most people know that the goal of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is sobriety, but what they don’t know is that the goal of Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families (ACA) is emotional sobriety. And if you’ve listened to my podcast for some time, you will not be shocked to hear that the way to achieve emotional sobriety is through building healthy boundaries! This week’s e...

Send us Fan Mail I have been following a guy named David Bayer for some time now and have been greatly influenced by him. One of the many pieces of wisdom he shares about limiting beliefs is that when we have a core limiting belief that we can’t seem to let go of, no matter how many tools we use, it’s often because that belief is connected to a person. Specifically, it may be connected to a resent...

Send us Fan Mail As part of my ACA recovery journey, I have been making daily conscious contact with my inner family members, one of which includes my inner teenager. Through this inner work and checking in with my inner teen, I have realized that my people-pleasing ways have put me in harm’s way. Since I was often not able to say no, I found myself in situations I didn’t want to be in with feelin...

Send us Fan Mail Everyone is on their unique path to healing. While there are many things we can gain from others’ journeys, every journey is ultimately different, so it is important to find the path that works for you . Jesse Harless came to terms with this realization once he was introduced to what some may view as an unconventional form of healing, cold exposure, and plant medicine. What he did...

Send us Fan Mail If you’re not familiar with the term acting “as if”- it's a common saying in 12-step recovery and one of the ways we learn to adopt new ways of being in the world. Acting “as if” is essentially engaging in behaviors toward the goal of achieving something positive in your life by emulating the person you want to be or the life you want to have. But often, I get people question...

Send us Fan Mail Last week on the podcast, I talked about how setting healthy boundaries was the key to changing the four patterns of overgiving. I want to further that conversation today by providing actionable guidance on understanding yourself better, setting boundaries that reflect your actual wants and needs, and upholding your boundaries once you decide on them. This week’s episode 288 of th...

Send us Fan Mail I have always been a giver, but through recovery, I came to terms with the fact that I had been an overgiver. I felt obligated to drop everything and give to everyone at the drop of a hat, which was draining. However, through building healthy boundaries, I learned to give in a healthy way, pouring from the overflow instead of from an empty cup. This week’s episode 287 of the Fragm...

Send us Fan Mail Many people think that building boundaries is about building walls between us and other people. While this is true in cases where you may have a dangerous or toxic person in your life that you need to build a wall between, in the majority of cases, boundaries actually bring us closer to other people. This week’s episode 286 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about building brid...

Send us Fan Mail Since getting into ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families), I have come to understand that I have gift trauma. This is a form of relational trauma (sometimes referred to as little t trauma) that is a result of something happening in the context of a relationship over time. For me, this came as a result of feeling emotionally invalidated through gifts in my pa...