Dating, Relationships, and Disability

Episode 250: Celebrating 250 Episodes of Dating, Relationships, and Disability Marking episode 250 with a look back at why this show exists and what it's covered since October 2021. Kathy founded the show to be a comprehensive resource helping people with disabilities navigate dating with confidence. Her approach blends her professional background as a mental health counselor with her own experien...

The Friendship series has kicked off to examine what is similar and different when a disability is present - and how friendship development is a lot like dating - they both involve vulnerability, taking risks, and acceptance. Two Friends, 40 Years Kathy O'Connell and Nancy met at 18 as freshmen at Le Moyne College in Syracuse. Nancy first noticed Kathy when a professor seemed impatient with her du...

Stage 4 (Active Dating) of her "5 Stages to Dating Success" framework. It's a tactical, mini-workshop style episode pulling content from her curriculum aimed at professionals in the disability field. 6 Key Skills for Active Dating Platform Engagement & Match Interaction — actively using apps or attending in-person events, following up with interested people Active Social Participation — attend...

Kathy O'Connell shares that she's working on a new book about dating and relationships with a disability — a follow-up to her earlier book Firewalk: Embracing Different Abilities . The book focuses on two key themes: Sexual ableism — the societal message, conscious or not, that disabled people don't belong in romance or intimate relationships. Kathy explains it as an extension of ableism: the beli...

Pauline Bosma is the founder and coordinator of the Rainbow Support Groups, a network of support groups for LGBTQ+ people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. Pauline works for Massachusetts Advocates Standing Strong, where she also leads sex education webinars and trains people with disabilities to respond to and report abuse. Oscar Hughes is a PhD student in special education at Bos...

Resources for this episode How to Write a Kick Butt Dating Profile Guide Tell me what you want in a dating playbook. The Five Stage Dating Success Framework is designed to guide people with disabilities through the process of finding meaningful relationships. Stage 1 covers foundation work and self-discovery. Stage 2 builds confidence and resilience, including the ability to handle rejection. Stag...

This is a strategy that can apply to nearly everything in life, not just dating. But of course, we’re going to talk about it as it relates to dating. When you’re overwhelmed and maybe unsure what the answer is to a dilemma, many times you don’t need to wait, search, or find an answer. Often you just need to make a decision. Miserable Maybes Have you ever heard of the “miserable maybes”? It’s when...

  Getting back into dating after time away — especially when navigating life with a disability — takes genuine courage. You made yourself vulnerable, put yourself out there, and someone said no. That moment can feel enormous, like a verdict on your worth or your lovability. But here's the truth: one person declining a coffee date or not even replying is simply one data point. It is not a patt...

Register  here  for the TODAY's free workshop,  The Real Work of Dating with Disability:  What No One Else Is Teaching.  I'll be reviewing how to use a skill set approach to dating with a disability. The workshop will be geared toward  professionals but anyone is welcome to join. Dating and Mental Health May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and few things stir u...

Register  here  for the upcoming free workshop on May 12,  The Real Work of Dating with Disability:  What No One Else Is Teaching.  I'll be reviewing how to use a skill set approach to dating with a disability. The workshop will be geared toward  professionals but anyone is welcome to join. Steve and Julie Wagstaff are the married founders of SwagAbility , a nonprofit...

Register here for the upcoming free workshop on May 12,  The Real Work of Dating with Disability:  What No One Else Is Teaching.  I'll be reviewing how to use a skill set approach to dating with a disability. The workshop will be geared toward  professionals but anyone is welcome to join. Today will be more of a personal episode as the day this podcast publishes, is my parents'...

Emily Beecher is a 50-year-old single mom and certified coach who specializes in working with neurodivergent individuals, particularly those with autism and ADHD. She was diagnosed with ADHD at 44 after her daughter received her diagnosis. With a 25-year career in media and arts, Emily discovered her passion for developing people and transitioned into coaching. Understanding Rejection Sensitive Dy...

The Five Stages of Dating Success is a rigorous, sequential curriculum for navigating the dating world. This isn't a feel-good framework—it's a skills-based approach addressing real challenges that many daters face. If you're tired of surface-level dating advice and ready for a strategic system that builds genuine confidence, addresses internalized doubts, and creates sustainable success, this fra...

Friending App: Combating Loneliness Through Authentic Connections Gabor Kadas, founder of Friending Inc. , appeared on the "Dating, Relationships and Disability" podcast to discuss his innovative friendship-focused app launching in March 2026. The app addresses a critical social issue: 50-60 million Americans report feeling lonely. Key Features: Friending differs fundamentally from dating apps by...

The Five Stages of Dating Success: What Transformation Actually Looks Like Dating with a disability isn't luck—it's a learnable skill set that can be developed, refined, and mastered. Here's what real transformation looks like through the Five Stages framework. The Foundation Problem Most people start dating without inner work, bringing unexamined negative beliefs, unprocessed shame, and desperate...

Keri Green is a licensed marriage and family therapist with over 20 years of experience and a certified sex therapist (AASECT). She specializes in relationships, sex, and intimacy, working daily with individuals and couples on their most vulnerable topics around dating and sexuality. Why Sex Therapy? Keri saw a need to normalize sex and validate sexual identity. Whether someone grows up in a sex-s...

The Five Stages of Dating Success: A Complete Roadmap Most people skip straight to action—download apps, create profiles, go on dates—then wonder why rejection stings so much or why they keep attracting the wrong people. For those with disabilities, add layers of disclosure anxiety, accessibility challenges, and navigating others' biases. Sustainable dating confidence can't be built from the outsi...

Marrying America isn't another dating app—it's an intentional courting website designed for people seeking their forever person. Founded by Jeremy Nelson, the platform addresses a critical gap: too many dating platforms mix people with completely different intentions, leaving serious relationship-seekers frustrated by matches who aren't looking for commitment. How the Match System Works The platfo...

Being overlooked in dating—especially when experiencing sexual ableism—hurts deeply. Your pain is valid. But understand this: being overlooked reflects others' limited perspectives and society's narrow view of desirability, not your actual worth. You're not the problem; their inability to see beyond surface judgments is. Recognize Your Own Value First Stop questioning if you're "dateable enough."...

About Amy Reiley Amy Reiley holds a master's degree in gastronomy and is a nutrition coach who has authored 5 cookbooks. She runs EatSomethingsexy.com, where she explores the connection between food and sexuality, having studied aphrodisiac foods for over 20 years. The Food-Sexuality Connection Amy explains that food affects sexuality through multiple pathways: nutrition, physiological effects, an...

Action #1: Create Your Personal Belief Statement Write one belief statement for each of the 5 areas. Choose ONE to focus on weekly. Set a daily reminder to repeat it aloud 3 times—morning, midday, and before bed. Why it works: Repetition rewires neural pathways. Speaking your new belief aloud, even when it feels untrue, trains your brain to believe something different about yourself. Action #2: Li...

Feeling hopeless in dating stems from negative beliefs about yourself, not actual flaws. Your mindset about your worth and what you offer influences dating success more than any other factor. When results don't come—no matches, no second dates—it's easy to spiral into "I'm not enough" thinking. The solution is shifting your core beliefs. Mindset Shift #1: Your Self-Worth Old belief: "No results me...

Overview Marriage and family therapist Pasha Marlowe, with 32 years of experience, discusses relationships through the lens of neurodiversity and non-apparent disabilities. She reveals that 53% of Gen Z identifies as neurodivergent and/or disabled, challenging common misconceptions. Understanding Neurodivergence Neurodivergence is an identity, not a diagnosis, encompassing autism, ADHD, dyslexia,...

I recently pivoted my work in dating and relationships and began a new company, Relatability LLC. Our mission is simple but transformative: we believe love is for everyone, and we're dedicated to making relationships accessible for people with disabilities. We work at every level of the disability services ecosystem—training professionals, developing curriculums, and providing one-on-one coaching...

Dr. Robin Buckley, a clinical psychologist turned executive coach,  specializes in helping female executives apply business strategies to their personal relationships. Overcoming Negative Dating Mindsets Dr. Buckley addresses how people—especially those who've been divorced or experienced relationship failures—often believe they're "not the relationship type." She explains this self-defeating...