Couples Healing From Pornography Addiction

Many couples fear that it's not possible to eliminate pornography use from their lives. Men struggle for decades with urges and temptation without the right tools. This leads them to fall back into old patterns and makes them believe they can't ever quit. Kevin was a man who went through my program and not only got the tools to quit pornography for good, he lost the desire to view it at all. No mo...

Many couples struggle with feelings of uncertainty and insecurity in their marriage.  Years of deception and lying erodes the foundation of trust, and a lack of communication or transparency keep things stuck. In this episode episode, I share a very easy-to-implement tool that can help you to build security in your marriage again. But missing this can keep your wheels spinning in your marriage des...

Many men and women wonder if quitting porn is actually possible to do or if it's something that just needs to be managed for the rest of their life. The good news: YES! It's 100% possible to quit and never return. In this episode I'll share with you specifically what I've seen work best to help men quit Porn and never return.  The more you have about what the underlying problem is, the more the so...

One very difficult hurdle that many women struggle, with is the idea of forgiveness or staying in the relationship with someone who hurt them so much. If she forgives him, does that mean he's getting away with everything? Does it make her feel like she has no dignity left if she stays in the relationship? That she just accepts behavior she completely stands against? In this episode, I share with y...

Rebuilding sexual intimacy after damage by pornography can be a challenge for many couples. A wife often has fears and concerns like: How do I know he's not fantasizing when we're intimate? What if he's just using me and I'm being manipulated? I feel inadequate and not attractive enough A husband often wants to know how to help his wife through her triggers and how to restore their intimacy togeth...

Going out into public can create a lot of anxiety for both a husband and wife. She's worried about who he's looking at and what he's thinking about, and he's worried about her getting triggered and feels anxious not knowing what to do or how to help her. In this episode, I share with a few specific things that you can do to address this issue to help build security in your relationship. If objecti...

If you had to get to the other side of a mountain, would you rather take a tunnel through it or climb all the way up and around it? It still takes effort and intention to get to the other side, but one path is far more streamlined. In this episode I share with you 3 things that can help take you through the tunnel when it comes to repairing your relationship. There isn't a one size fits all approa...

When pornography use is discovered in a relationship, there is often a lot of grief and hurt that surfaces. Shock about how this could have happened. Feeling stuck in pain not knowing how to make sense of it. And grief about what the relationship once was and uncertain about how to move forward. In this episode I share a few specific ways to approach grief, sadness, and hurt that enables healing a...

After pornography use, a husband becomes a source of pain as well as a source of comfort for his wife. this can be such a confusing place for both people to be. Sometimes she doesn't want to be around him at all, but other times she needs him close and for him to provide reassurance. As a man, oftentimes he doesn't know what to say or how to help so he ends up giving space when really what she nee...

Understanding and resolving the underlying issues that lead pornography use is essential.  Without addressing the root cause, you're bound to continue to struggle with triggers and temptations. Announcement!!! Trust is a critical part of rebuilding your relationship after pornography use has damaged it So, I decided to do a special trust building workshop, where for 90 minutes I’ll be doing a deep...

Announcement!!! Trust is a critical part of rebuilding your relationship after pornography use has damaged it So, I decided to do a special trust building workshop, where for 90 minutes I’ll be doing a deep dive and sharing with you specific steps you can take, tools you can implement, and practical ways that you can rebuild trust in your relationship. There are 2 ways to access the training - it'...

Announcement!!! Trust is a critical part of rebuilding your relationship after pornography use has damaged it. So, I decided to do a special trust building workshop, where for 90 minutes I’ll be doing a deep dive and sharing with you specific steps you can take, tools you can implement, and practical ways that you can rebuild trust in your relationship. Before I offer the workshop for sale, I’m do...

Have you ever felt so hopeless and discouraged as you've tried to quit pornography that you thought that there's no way out? Despite how hard you've tried, you just haven't been able to get this problem out of your life. This is how Braden felt before we started to work together. He tried everything he possibly could, but it still didn't work. After discovering there is a new way he could approach...

Pornography use damages a relationship in deep and significant ways. Trust is broken and her wall goes up. The idea of forgiveness can feel impossible to offer, and a husband feels despair wondering if they’ll ever move on from the past and find closure. This episode I share with you how you can navigate this painful situation in a way that will feel comfortable for both of you. While forgiveness...

When a woman discovers her husband's pornography use, her whole world gets turn upside down.  Oftentimes she now thinks that everything was a lie. Their whole relationship was fake. They don't even know who their husband is anymore. Given how much damage is done, many women experience what's called betrayal trauma. In this episode I share with you the 5 indicators that a woman is experiencing betr...

When a spouse is gone for the day or weekend and a man is all alone, it's a common trigger. In this episode I share 3 specific things you can do to make sure that those periods of being alone won't cause another setback. For therapy with Sam: I will work with you for 12 weeks to help you eliminate pornography use and the root cause that started it. If after the 12 weeks you haven’t fully been able...

Change is 100% if you have the right ingredients. In today's episode, I want to introduce to you a man who has found success, and 2 years later, he continues to to do well, have a strong marriage, and help other people in their struggles with quitting porn. This path can I often feel discouraging and depressing because most men experience countless failures and setbacks along the way. The common t...

Initiating conversations can be very difficult for a husband to do. If his wife is in a good mood, he doesn’t want to bring up the pain all over again. If she's in a bad mood, he doesn't want to cause a fight or make things worse. Thus, he avoids the conversations with her and she ends up feeling unseen, unloved, and all alone. In this episode, I share with you specific ways you can address this s...

How do the conversations go when you talk about her pain? Do they end with you feeling closer or further apart? Do you feel hopeless and inadequate, not knowing what to say to help her feel comforted? For a wife, not getting the understanding and validation she needs creates hurt and anger, and the conversations just stall out leaving them both alone. In this episode I share with you one of the ma...

Have you ever gotten into an argument with your spouse where you're talking about specific actions that he's committed to do but then doesn't follow through? For a wife, it can feel really frustrating if there’s a lack of follow through because she often receives that as him not being committed or caring enough. For a husband, it can be frustrating because if he’s working on things but then feels...

"We've been spinning our wheels for 9 months... I'm in a worst place now than the day I discovered everything." A couple reached out to me a few hours before recording this episode. They were both discouraged and frustrated add the slow pace of the process of healing. No matter what they did, she just felt stuck and like she couldn't move forward because some key things in their approach were miss...

    This road to healing your marriage can be agonizing. So many people wonder how long will this take? They feel like they might not be able to hold on much longer.   The good news is that it’s actually not based on a specific timeline or a number of years. Rather it’s based on how quickly you can learn the skills that you need to have new experiences together.   Some couples can feel like they a...

After the discovery of pornography use, it shatters the foundation of the entire relationship. Naturally, it becomes the center of most conversations as you try to resolve the issues and pain it causes. Then after you start making some progress, many couples wonder how long they need to keep talking about things? They often tend to have the same conversations over and over again, so they wonder wh...

Couples can very easily get stuck when a husband has a slip up, acts like things are normal, and then his wife finds out that he searched for something and didn’t tell her. This can cause a wife to spiral into distrust, self protection, anger and fear all over again and it has such a big impact on the relationship and their sense of progress together. Her wall goes up, she feels suspicious of anyt...

March 18th: Join the free 5 Day 'Overcome Your Urges' Challenge   to get tools to resolve the root cause of your urges so you can eliminate them instead of resisting them. It can be very discouraging when there is a mismatch between husband and wife, and how they view their progress. If hey husband thinks he's making strides towards creating safety and rebuilding trust, but the wife doesn't agree,...