Close the Door: Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire Podcast

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's time to get your PEEEETYR on, as Littlefinger moves from his Tiny House in the Fingers to a deluxe apartment in the sky. Will Sansa move from pawn to player? Could GRRM possibly have more SanSan foreshadowing in this chapter? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Sansa VI Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 242

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's the trial of the young century and with Cersei McBeal in charge, things don't look good for Tyrion. We get another sweet, fleeting taste of the sexy Oberyn Martell, but inquiring minds want to know - did Oberyn get a taste of Cersei? GRRM is the Jaime and Brienne fanfic author of our dreams and we want more. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Stor...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We debunk some rumors, but spread a few others as we delve into season 8 leaks, theories and spoilers. Will the bang that was promised live up to the hype (duh)? Will the shocking events actually be logical and in character (oh you sweet summer child)? Will we all literally watch ice melt to get a release date or a trailer (shamefully, yes)? Game of Thrones. A...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Sansa turns from porcelain, to ivory, to steel, but finds herself fleeing from one terrible situation to another. Littlefinger's plots make almost as much sense as his ways of wooing women. We mourn the lack of SanSan in the show, and wonder if Sansa will ever get to actually kiss a half decent man. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords -...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It’s a nice day for a Purple Wedding. Olenna’s giving Sansa some serial killer hairnet realness. Joffrey stars in his first and last “I’m on a horse!” Old Spice commercial. GRRM might be the original wordy food blogger, so you can just shove some pigeon pie down your cake hole for the very bestest chapter ever. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's time for Joffrey's wedding breakfast, but where are the Bloody Marys and cheesy hashbrowns, George? Who needs fantasy football when you can have fantasy Kingsguards? Did Robert have a subscription to Melees Monthly? Tyrion is...problematic and no matter what tidbits GRRM give us, we're just not here for your Targ BS. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fir...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Turns out not everyone is that into dragon sex dungeons. If you need staff who can keep their mouth shut, Brella's your girl. Tyrion talks himself out of loving a whore. Again. Like Shae we aim high by going low. Are the Brave Companions the real J/B shippers? Hooray for Occasional Gents x 2! Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Tyrion...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Joffrey doesn’t know when to just take a win, but Tyrion knows when to pull out the Michael Jackson popcorn gif. Cersei had one job! We decide we prefer a Benadryl timeout. And we learn that Elia was an afterthought because Tywin is the real monster here. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Tyrion VI. Close The Door And Come Here - Epi...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Will Jaime's goldenshaft plunge deep into Brienne's Riverlands? Something something people juices, muppet casting, and more we won't remember in the morning after our latest Drunkcast. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. Drunkcast 7.0. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 234

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. How many podcasters does it take to pronounce Jalabhar Xho correctly? Come for the Dornish jokes, but stay for the introduction of Oberyn Martell, who lives up to the hype, somehow. Is Oberyn too sexy for his shirt? Is Willas the founder of the Westerosi thoroughbred? Is it really that hard to adminster the new King's Landing whore tax? We answer these questio...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Tyrion wants Sansa (gross). Symon Silver Tongue just wants to be a star. We just want to share our newest conspiracy theory. Also..remember back in 2015 when GRRM thought he was done with Winds? Good times. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Tyrion IV. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 232

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Welcome to only the third worst wedding in ASoS! Misery loves company - and so does Cersei. Sansa still wants Willas, the puppies, and the barge. We just want GRRM to get his timelines straight and quit with the inaccurate nipple references. Let's shut the door and go there as Sansa's personal nightmare continues. #NotAllOccasionalGents Game of Thrones. A Song...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Littlefinger Dice Clay has got the jokes, but can he survive a double karate chop to his groin region? Everyone wonders if Joffrey’s wedding will have an open bar. Also, is everyone poisoning everyone? Maybe. At least everyone knows they could do worse than Willas Tyrell. But seriously, where in the world is Tyrek Lannister? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Cersei is why Sansa can’t have nice things. Sansa’s getting all the cloaks. We figured out why Winds is so long in coming (and it’s not what you might think). Stop asking GRRM about discrepancies in the books. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords Sansa II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 229 39m 37s

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. What is the process for becoming a Kingsguard? Do they ask them “If you were a tree, what kind of a tree would you be?” Does Varys have back problems? Can Tyrion get any more disgusting? Is Shae dying to go the wedding of the century? How does Tyrion function without nose hair? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords Tyrion II. Close The Doo...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Olenna has her "Sure, Jan" moment. Did Mace wait for his mom to be playing bridge before working with Littlefinger to arrange the marriage for Margaery? Butterbumps has some serious game and may have edged Cheese Boy out of his place in Guile's heart. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. ASoS Sansa I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 227

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We hate Tyrion a little less than before. Is this a temporary respite? Tyrek Lannister, dead or alive? We get out the Reynolds Wrap as we speculate on his status. The Tyrells got game. Tywin Lannister: father of the year. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. ASoS - Tyrion I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 226

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We steal a concept from our friends at Davos Fingers: you supply the questions and we give five answers. Where's that perfect Star Trek/ASoIaF crossover when you need it? Can't imagine a worse Supreme Court nominee? We can. We've got hot old men, top Jaime and Brienne moments, favorite literal ships, and much, much more. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Hyle is the George Bailey of Westeros, but more importantly, is he hot? We discuss the perfect Hyle fancasts (NCW or Judd Nelson?) and debate if Hyle just a dudebro, or if he's Brienne's last chance at the good life. We're not sure of that, but we are sure that we better get some snarky Hyle/Jaime interactions in Winds. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire....

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Who misplaced Jaime's face? It's 10:00 am in Belfast City Airport - do you know where Gwendoline Christie is? Filming spoilers are as rare as the beef in the steak & seafood joint frequented by Nikolaj, Liam and Pilou, but we soldier on to bring you the best sleuthing no money can buy. Come for the speculation, but stay for the hot new goth band, The Trebuchet...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. GRRM doesn't know snow (or animal husbandry). Does anybody really know the best cut of man meat? Asha has the best bachelorette contestants and inquiring minds want to know - Stannis Baratheon: kinging it or winging it? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - The Sacrifice. ADwD: Asha III. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 222

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Asha and company are on the highway to hell (or the slow march to Winterfell). The northerners just want to bathe in Bolton blood, while Asha just wants to get warm, Justin Massey just wants to get with Asha, and Stannis just wants everyone to STFU about Robert. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. ADwD The King's Prize Close The Door And Come Here - Episo...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We read GRRM's "best" love scene and we're unimpressed (except with Qarl). Are zee Glovers zee secret Frenchmen of Westeros? Are the Ironborn (Asha excluded) the Honey Boo Boos of Westeros? Is any character man enough for Hagen's Daughter? Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. ADwD The Wayward Bride.   Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 220

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. With Asha and The Reader, maybe the Ironborn aren't so bad after all? Theon Greyjoy! Go see your Mama! Does Tristifer Botley understand how anatomy works, or is he expecting a Kraken to show up with his dozen children? And, we get some meaty questions on Lady Stoneheart, the Targs, and why Dany gets so much fandom hate. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire....

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Join us for this special episode where we discuss and dissect some of the great vessels of Westeros and beyond - from the Cinnamon Wind to Silence. Nah, just kidding! We're talking romance, self-inserts, ship-shaming and cousin-loving with a big side of SanSan, a little bit of Gendrya, and our usual dash of Jaime and Brienne. Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and...