Close the Door: Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire Podcast

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We sense a little bit of Theon coming out of the darkness while poor Jeyne gets pushed into it. If we ignore the groom, Winterfell sounds like a beautiful wedding venue and maybe Wyman Manderly missed his calling as a caterer. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - The Prince of Winterfell (Theon IV). Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 642

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Dany is stuck between a rock and a hard place - and we don't mean Daario. We appreciate Dany's soft heart, but why does she always have to make the worst romantic choices? The heart wants what it wants and maybe Dany is destined to rule alone. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Daenerys VI. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 641

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon gets positive comments from us in his 360 degree review. Dolorous Edd is always a delight, but we question George's understanding of large snow drifts. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Jon VII. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 640

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Enjoy this Drunkcast repost from 2016! Could Brienne handle apple pie moonshine? Should Jaime pawn his golden hand to build the frock-frack shack? Robert + Ned = Gendry? Clutch your earphones as we have a Pro-JB-Baby vs Anti-JB-Baby rumble, a serious Brienne x Tyrion debate, ponder whether Qyburn is the Dr. Nick of Westeros, and fix each other up with ASOIAF c...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Bran's final chapter is a masterpiece, but why do we assume Meera is alive? Is Bran Stark more powerful than Bloodraven? Are they related? Is Bloodraven pulling one over on Bran or has he learned his lesson? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Bran III. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 638

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Tyrion's coming back to himself and we couldn't be more relieved. Penny is actually great and maybe the fandom is just super misogynistic? You know it's a good chapter when you get to talk about pyroclastic flows. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Tyrion VIII. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 637

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Roose is on the loose, but he's suddenly a far more strategic guy than the vampire who curated the Red Wedding playlist. Poor Theon has to listen to everyone's inappropriate stories. I guess it's better than getting flayed? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Reek III. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 636

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Fire Woman! That's right, in this encore episode we get inside the head of our favorite red priestess. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Melisandre I. Originally recorded in 2018. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 635

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Dany’s stuck in Meereen and so are we, and no one is happy about it. Guile calls these chapters Dany’s office hours, and it’s hard to disagree. Does anyone blame a fifteen year old for picking the least bad of fifty bad options? And look, GRRM, we agree that the Meereenese knot is indeed a quagmire, but if it was caused by a pacing problem couldn’t we have sid...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. In this Patreon exclusive, we deep dive on a listener prompt about the use of the phrase "I dreamed of you" in GRRM's expanded universe. Two of the characters who use this dream are Targaryens (or Targ adjacent) and two are Lannisters. Does it mean anything? Is the phrase for the dreamer or the dreamed of? Are two out of three instances romantic? Where does Ty...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Davos gets the best food and the best gossip while waiting for Wyman Manderly to cut off his head and hands. The Wolf Den might have the world’s worst Christmas tree trimmings, but it’s a heck of an homage to the Stark-Manderly mutual appreciation society. Finally, we all fist pump because the North Remembers...even if some of us forgot to read the right chapt...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon’s living out everyone’s 3 on 1 fantasy, and two of them are twins! This chapter definitely reveals the fic that could have been when Jon and “Rattleshirt” throwdown, and Comma has sage advice for AO3 writers looking for a new niche. We all feel like Jon’s getting the full seduction treatment from Mel, tailored to his northern tastes. And who is R'hllor all...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We're not happy to be back in Tyrion's head, but does Jorah Mormont make us more sympathetic to him? Group Rate to Meereen: the book that could have been. Penny just makes everyone sad. Bonus—we figure out why we don't have Winds! A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Tyrion VII. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 630

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We read GRRM's "best" love scene and we're unimpressed (except with Qarl). Are zee Glovers zee secret Frenchmen of Westeros? Are the Ironborn (Asha excluded) the Honey Boo Boos of Westeros? Is any character man enough for Hagen's Daughter? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - The Wayward Bride (Asha I). Originally recorded in 2018. Close The Door And...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Are we bigger drunken dreamers than Daeron, because we sit down to discuss future Dunk & Egg novellas. As if! If Dunk's gonna hit it in all of Westeros, we hope there are at least some stops in Winterfell, Tarth and Casterly Rock. We hope to see some more potentially fun Targaryen ladies, but cannot believe in a version of these stories where our favorite...

Spoilers, profanity. Welcome to the sloppiest conspiracy in history. Glendon's got game, while Dunk is just really huge. Never go to the second location, Dunk, even if it is with the world's laziest murderer. Bloodraven continues to bring the humor, but maybe give poor concussed Dunk a break? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms - The Mystery Knight - Part III (re-reread). Close...

Spoilers, profanity. Never turn down an open bar. But maybe don't put Two Hearts Beat as One on your wedding playlist. We find out why Dunk needed four pages in the White Book. While Daemon is trying for a Whitewalls version of Heated Rivalry, Bloodraven should be headed to the local comedy club. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms - The Mystery Knight - Part II (re-reread). Clo...

Spoilers, profanity. As we join Dunk & Egg on another adventure, it's clear that Guile picked a bad night to make stew and that Dunk is Daemon's Fabio. How does anyone forget that Egg is a Targaryen and seriously, these inflation complaints are always relatable. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms - The Mystery Knight - Part I (re-reread). Close The Door And Come Here - Epis...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Join us as we review Season 1 and discuss our hopes and dreams for Season 2. It's grading time. It's also gold medal time, with some three way ties, although it's almost impossible to choose a favorite between Dunk & Egg. We’re happy we got some Brienne this season, but is it possible to have too much? We talk about what’s in store for Dunk and Egg in Seas...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Surprise, we’re all charmed by Lyonel's “come home with me” pillow talk, but we’re split on his anti-Targ agenda. Do Maekar and Dunk have a trauma bond? Bring on the additions if they’re like this Egg contemplating murdering Aerion scene—we’re leaning into it like Egg leaning into Maekar. Like Dunk, we’re all a little melancholy as we say goodbye to Ser Arlan,...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Egg has to watch this age-inappropriate trial, but Guile would never have watched The Hunger Games. Humfrey Beesbury got a honey mustache instead of an introduction, but what a mustache it is. We all love Ser Duncan the Tall’s pre-teen backstory, but we don’t love the extra unexpected pain. Maekar continues to be a fav, but we all have to admit this battle wou...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Maekar is giving off major Gen X wine dad energy, and we’re here for it, but Baelor is the brother who has our hearts. If we ever stop complaining about the lighting, please call 911. We are split on the Game of Thrones theme’s heroic appearance, but we all agree that we wanted more Humfreys. At least we can assume that things will get happier and more upbeat...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Guile’s feeling the Black Stallion vibes as Egg takes Thunder through a pre-breakfast training montage. We’re just going to call this guy Ser Ryan Gosling if that’s ok with everyone else. Dunk teaches us how to make breakfast sandwiches Westerosi style and also how to do a whip stitch. House Fossoway really loves them apples, and as long as they’re green, so d...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Is Ser Arlan packing a canon cannon? Maybe! Everyone hitting on Ser Duncan the Tall sure is. Maekar is the Jan to Baelor’s Marcia on this episode of the Targaryen Bunch. Dunk’s getting the feels with Tanselle and panic from the tourney, Egg’s somehow remaining anonymous despite being the only bald kid in town, and we’re just loving every last second of this ri...

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Ser Duncan the Tall and his mysterious hairless squire "Egg" start their adventures in episode 1 of the first season of HBO's latest foray into Westeros. We love the casting, we love the tone, and we love the little digs at Game of Thrones. Is there more book dialogue than original dialogue? Is Tanselle a puppeteer or is she more of special effects artist? Is...