Botched: A D&D Podcast

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Apparently, some people think it's a good idea to have a staring contest with roided out giraffes. If you find yourself in a similar situation. Run. Now that the giraffes are out of the pen, the group changes tactics to surviving. Some may find it easier to hide. Some may find it easier to attack. Others may find it easier to come up with completely idiotic p...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Alright, so things may have gotten a little out of hand. Feral pigs ripped some people apart, but at least the gang got out in mostly one piece. However, faced with the chance that Aiden won’t live much longer, they decide to delay their mission, and instead go to the zoo! Surprisingly, the zoo still has a lot of its original exhibits. However, a few animals...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The Duke really seems like someone you don’t want to make angry. Aside from the shooting and the stabbing that is. It’s probably a good thing he doesn’t know the group is after a cure to the fungal zombie outbreak… Meanwhile, Feaster and his horde of murderous pigs is making their way to the hospital. I’m sure that nothing horrible could possibly happen in th...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Last we left off, the group was jumping out of the way as an RPG was barreling towards their vehicle. Unfortunately, it seems like Porschia did not make it out in time, nor did almost any of the animals. Mike Feaster is pinned down by suppressing fire, soon to be captured or murdered by the Houston Wreckers. But perhaps an unforeseen act of god will save him....

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The group finally decides it’s time to get back to business and find that potential cure. The group decides that a divide and conquer approach is the best way into the city. Feaster leads the way driving a box truck as if it were a race car. That goes about as well as you might imagine against a group of people with guns. Some amount of people make it into Ho...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! RIP William, we knew you too well. Anywho, now that’s out of the way, the group can get back to finding the cure! Except, they seem to have driven into a trap. As it turns out, Porchia is not dead after all! She has laid a trap for the party, and she’s not alone. She is joined by a small child that she found in the wild, who seems to be quite the damaged indi...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! God’s game is apparently golf. However, I don’t recall golf having packs of wild dogs chase you, or getting shot with an arrow if you bogey. I definitely don’t remember the part where if someone gets a hole in one, someone else gets shot. Regardless, the party has to play this game or else they will not receive the antidote to the poison they were given. Asid...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! That poor poor driver. Dissolved and eaten by a fungal monster. However, he did keep wounding Charlie by accident, so I guess that makes it okay? The group now finds themselves surrounded by the Keepers of the Rot. But, running away does not seem to be an option. The cultists have poisoned the party! The only way they will receive the antidote is to play in “...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Not sure why, but this group is really obsessed with having animal companions, regardless of the type of animal. First a possum, then a slug, and now armadillos. Except, they haven’t even caught one of those yet. Instead, they’re being approached by a creepy mold cult. The cult seems to say nothing at all, except their chanting of ooga chaka ooga ooga ooga ch...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! We are joined by our extra special guest Stephen from Horseshoes and Hand Grenades! He’ll be joining us tonight as the group’s expert driver. After accepting a mission to find a cure to the fungal zompocalypse, the group suits up with a ton of goodies. On top of that, they’re given a vehicle to make the long trip even easier. Not only that, they are given a d...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Faced with the choice between crawling through William’s shit pipe or scoping out a seedy research facility, the group went with espionage. They found some pretty troubling stuff with all the research being done on the infected. However, that would be fairly normal in the post apocalypse. What is not normal is collecting an eyeball slug, putting it in a tube...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! It wouldn’t be a season of Botched without a good ol fashioned interrogation. Who knew they could be so violent? However, they can’t really linger on the information they’ve gathered as the town is being invaded by thousands of zombies, including mutations who can lob fungus like a mortar! Based on the information gathered they could easily just escape, but t...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The party is back in town and of course they are consumed by the all important question: What’s in the box!? Without knowing exactly who knows, the group must perform their own form of investigation. Knowing our players they of course will not be conducting a standard investigation but one based on torture, trickery, and other forms of tom foolery. What else...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Porchia has fallen into a deep dark hole and her whereabouts are currently unknown. For all we know, she may be dead! However, the group will not have much time to think about it because there is still a large acid fungus spewing monster in their vicinity. The group decides to try and employ a divide and conquer mentality. Now without the aid of his furry fri...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Chelsea Bytes returns in her starring role as the “mouth of Sauron” to the council! The group has just arrived in Atlanta, and it seems there are things other than the standard fungal zombie running around. Having underestimated the enemy, the group quickly finds themselves surrounded by a horde of monsters. They’ll have to use their wits to make it out alive...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Some time has passed since our last outing with the group. The CDC HQ has turned into a fully functioning society. Possibly the last society in the country, if not the world! Each of our intrepid adventurers has taken on a job and new responsibilities within this society. This new society is run by a shadowy government called “The Council.” We are joined by a...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! William has made it to the train...and so have all the other players! Jenna is still out on vacation so her characters will be absent, but it’s fine! There’s plenty of chaos to still go around. Having been stuck in the wounded or sick section of the train, trigger happy vigilantes decide to try to take over the train. However, they’ll find that a couple dudes...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Hold the phone! Is that a new member of the Botched crew?!? Welcome to Stephen Hardy aka HeWhoIsSteve! Jenna is out on a well deserved vacation, but we need to get Steve’s character up to speed! Who is Steve playing? Well, some conspiracy nutjob named William. We will pick up with him, his neighbor and his neighbor’s weird kid as they begin to make a short pe...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! This is it! One way or another all of our stories are going to be converging on this train. The last train to the quarantine zone. Charlie and Boof have already made it on the train, but it seems they’re not completely safe on the train either. Sal and his elderly crew follow a trucker fan to a nearby city in hopes of hopping on the train, but find that drugs...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Finally, a connecting thread between our stories. A train! However, everyone seems to be at different distances from this train. Louise, Feaster, and Mr. Patrick are looking to pick up some booze before their very long drive. However, they may instead be ditching some dead weight. Sal and the gang continue to drive a stolen suburban around, but at a gas stati...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The timelines have almost lined up! Unfortunately Sal and the gang are in quite the crappy situation...so they steal ANOTHER car. Boofington is just as disgusting as you could imagine, however it is not as safe as you would hope. Attacked by a group of incredibly aggressive people they have to fight for their lives! Who doesn’t enjoy a joy ride around Myrtle...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The three groups have changed drastically as lives have been lost and allies made. Sal and the gang decide to rob a Denny’s for their sweet sweet horse cream, only to find the employees are not quite as helpless as they assume. Louise and Feaster make a new, very slow driving ally, in an attempt to escape Myrtle Beach. Jeff and Charlie limp their way into the...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! We continue to follow three groups as they attempt to survive the insanity that the world has become. The first story picks up as a plane is about to crash into the highway where Charlie, Ben and Jeff are running away from. This may sound like the most dangerous part of the story, but is it? Mike Feaster, Louise, and Mr. Peebers have made it to the bar, but i...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The world has gone to hell in a handbasket, and rather quickly. Our story revolves around 3 groups of people all trying to survive this escalation of violence in different areas of the east coast of the US. The first story tonight involves old Sal the bus driver. To him, this is a fairly normal stop at the Waffle House, but soon he will find, things are a bit...

Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The first episode of the new season! You may find this one to be a little different. That’s because we recorded it live at Dragoncon for the first time ever! The story centers around three groups of characters. Our first is a couple trying desperately to move out of the father’s house. Things progress as might one expect in a strange southern swamp family, be...