Best Life Best Death

Rachel has her MDA – Master of Death Administration! Her personal experience settling estates led her to create a business as an After Loss Professional. So what does that actually mean? In this episode, we talk about “legacy organization” before death, and the management of everything that follows after. What do we need to know now? What blind spots might we be leaving behind? Why do so many of u...

Words straight from her website: “As a death doula, educator, and public speaker, Erin Merelli guides individuals, families, and communities to meet mortality with intention, courage, and love. Her message is simple but not easy: We are all going to die, and to manage that well, we need to talk about it.” Oh yes indeed! Erin’s clarity and ability to articulate why these conversations matter shines...

Description: On BLBD episode #145, one year ago, Kate and I talked extensively about VSED, Voluntarily Stopping Eating and Drinking. Her mother chose VSED to hasten her death, and we discussed her family’s experience in detail. Well, Kate is back with an update — and beautifully, remarkably, it’s about her father’s experience with VSED. After witnessing his wife choose VSED to bring her life to a...

Now this is a subject that I really enjoy covering: books. In this episode I chat with a teenager who is a voracious reader — and does she ever know death-themed books! She gives us the run-down on her six favorite books about death, and by the end of it, I challenge you to choose one to read. From settings of fantasy worlds, to cemetery plots; from characters who are the Son of Death, to terminal...

If you already heard Part I, then you know that this is an episode you do not want to miss! Personal and professional, we dive into what matters most. What are the values and models we hold in caring for the aging? Is there an opportunity to turn towards this often-avoided topic? Rather than jumping over the hard parts and romanticizing about “a good death,” can we instead stick with the mundane,...

This is a topic, a duo, and a two-part podcast that you do not want to miss! I love it when BLBD is both personal and professional, and these two episodes land in that deep space. It all started because I read Courtney Martin’s article “Lack of Eldercare Is Unconscionable” – how’s that for a title? – and when I reached out to Courtney, she suggested we include her father’s gerontologist in the con...

Dr. Holly Everett’s work helps us better understand roadside memorials and other public expressions of remembrance. Her 1998 master’s thesis, “Crossroads: Roadside Accident Memorials in and around Austin, Texas,” examines 35 memorials, exploring how they’re constructed and the cultural meanings they convey. What is the intent of a roadside memorial? Is it meant to be temporary or permanent? Are th...

Laura Cleminson believes that we could all use more preparation before the people we are close to are dying. How can we get that? Through conversation! Based north of Boston, Laura founded the Pre-Dead Social Club as a way to get her community talking. She creates structured — and fun — social events that bring strangers together to discuss an end-of-life topic, share information, and even touch o...

In this BLBD episode, author Kristina Amelong joins me to share the deeply personal journey behind her memoir What My Brother Knew . Through honest conversations and reflection, Kristina explores the life and death of her brother, who died at the age of 13 in a bicycle accident – which he knew would happen. How did he know? How did the family deal with this? How did exploring this family trauma ov...

What does “code status” really mean — and how does it affect the care we receive at the end of life? In this episode, Dr. Matthew Tyler returns to clarify common misunderstandings about CPR, DNR, and medical interventions during serious illness and the frailty of old age. We explore when full code makes sense, when it probably doesn’t, and how patients and families can make informed, values-based...

Dr. Matthew Tyler returns to explore the layers of palliative care — what it is, what it isn’t, and how it differs from hospice. We discuss everything from managing physical and existential pain to the role of family dynamics and coping skills in end-of-life care. Is pain at the end of life inevitable, and how can it be managed? What role can patients and families play in guiding medical decisions...

On this BLBD episode I talk with Penny Hawkins Smith, nationally certified hospice and palliative care nurse and social media rockstar! Penny’s 2025 book,   Influencing Death: Reframing Dying for Better Living , forms the basis of our conversation, but of course we hit on a range of topics, including Penny's path into hospice care, how her TikTok videos on death and dying have alleviated death...

A good death should be a right not a privilege — Do you agree? Listen to this week’s podcast to learn about how our incarcerated population dies behind bars. The Humane Prison Hospice Project provides training to incarcerated individuals, empowering them to support their peers by building on the knowledge many already possess and fostering a sense of purpose for both those offering care and those...

In this episode, I sit down with two fabulous and funny podcast hosts, Anita Coyle and Mel Shore, founders of the Widow We Do Now? podcast. They share their experiences of widowhood, both the parts that are isolating and pieces that have lifted them up. How might you help a friend who is newly widowed after a long period as a caregiver? Or a coworker who loses a partner suddenly? What about if som...

Kacie Gikonyo is a registered nurse, death doula, and educator with over 12 years of experience in end-of-life care. She is the founder of Death Doula School, offering training for death doulas, and leads The Death Doula Collective, a national network for practitioners in the field. Kacie’s mission is to demystify death and provide compassionate support to individuals and their families. In this e...

From his humble days as a “lawn guy” at a local funeral home, to his current role as a funeral director and leader on the board of the Green Burial Council, Samuel Perry stands out! I am excited to bring you this conversation about green burial, because it includes not just the facts, but also a thoughtful discussion of what green burial represents and could mean to any one of us. When we say “tra...

This week I’ll give you an overview of the many ways a body can be laid to rest — from traditional cremation to options like green burial, water cremation, and terramation. We’ll explore what can be done with ashes and how personal values shape these end-of-life decisions. Whether you’re new to these concepts or looking for what’s current, this episode offers a practical guide to body disposition...

Jennifer A. O’Brien, MSOD, joins me to discuss a topic that we all need more understanding around: caregiving. In her book Care Boss: Leadership Strategies and Resources for Family Caregivers she draws from over 35 years in healthcare leadership and personal caregiving experiences to share practical tools, organizational strategies, and compassionate insights for supporting loved ones through seri...

Whether large or small, urban or suburban, many of us have a favorite cemetery. Perhaps the crown jewel of cemeteries in the US is the National Historical Landmark of Green-Wood Cemetery in Brooklyn, New York. Founded in 1838, by the 1860s it had earned an international reputation for its magnificent beauty. This week I talk with Gabrielle Gatto, Manager of Public Programs at Green-Wood Cemetery,...

Former hospice and oncology nurse turned Doulagiver Trainer, Suzanne B. O’Brien has dedicated her life to teaching people how to care for those at the end of it. In our first podcast conversation (BLBD #105), we explored the reality that most of us will, at some point, be called to support a loved one at the end of life. And guess what – that is still true. But couldn’t we be more prepared? In thi...

This week, doula, educator and book-lover Jade Adgate joins me to explore children’s books that delve into the tender topics of death, grief and loss. Why is it important to read about these subjects? How early can you start? And how can books guide us inward to our emotions and help us make sense of the world? Jade beautifully articulates the possibilities and meaning within life’s challenges. Wh...

Sometimes, the truth is that the dead are not always our “beloved.” Relationships can be incredibly complex, and when a person in a complicated relationship dies, the grief that follows is…complicated. The often-heard phrase “Grief = Love” may resonate with some, but it is far from  universal. This week on the Best Life Best Death podcast, Tawnya Musser and I explore grief in the context of challe...

In this information-filled episode, Tawnya Musser and I explore the power and possibilities of home funerals. What exactly is a “home funeral”? How does it differ from one managed by a funeral home or institution? What might a home funeral look like, and how can family and friends take part in meaningful ways? Most importantly, how does it expand your options when you better understand this legal...

In this episode, I chat with Jennifer O’Brien, author of The Hospice Doctor’s Widow: An Art Journal of Caregiving and Grief and also Care Boss. (More on that one in another episode!) This book is a deeply moving art journal that captures Jennifer’s experience as a caregiver during her husband Bob Lemberg’s ordeal with metastatic cancer. With digital collages, heartfelt reflections, and Bob’s insig...

In this episode, I’m joined by Ken Ross, son of the legendary Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, whose groundbreaking work revolutionized the field of end-of-life care. Ken shares insights into his mother’s contributions, including the true meaning and intentions behind the “5 stages” model which is so commonly associated with her name. We also explore his ongoing work with the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundatio...