Becoming Whole

Send us Fan Mail What if our deepest sexual fantasies were actually signposts toward healing and connection? Join us for an eye-opening conversation with Drew Boa as we uncover the transformative power hidden within our desires. We discuss how our fantasies can point us toward safety, glory, and connection while providing the keys to unlock intimacy and healing in our lives. In this journey of sel...

Send us Fan Mail What if the secrets to unlocking our hidden qualities and traits lie in our deepest sexual fantasies? This episode invites you to join our captivating conversation on how interpreting these desires can help us reclaim our identity and discover the glory God has put in us. We delve into the power of the particularity of fantasies and discuss how they provide us with data that needs...

Send us Fan Mail Have you ever found yourself struggling with unwanted sexual fantasies, attractions, or fetishes, and wondered how to overcome them? Our conversation with Drew Boa, founder of Husband Material, offers powerful insights and practical steps to help you heal and understand these complex issues. Join us as we discuss befriending our sexual thoughts and feelings instead of trying to ge...

Send us Fan Mail Do you know how to resist temptation and protect yourself from the enemy's lies? Join us as we explore the patterns of temptation and reveal valuable tools to strengthen your relationship with God. We dive into the story of Adam and Eve, uncovering how the enemy tries to divide us, exaggerate God's prohibitions, and downplay God's generosity. Learn how Sun Tzu'...

Send us Fan Mail Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the countless voices discussing topics like sex, gender, and marriage, and unsure of who to trust? You're not alone! In this episode, we dive into the wisdom of fourth-century theologian Gregory of Nazianus, who faced similar challenges in his time. Listen in as we share some of Gregory's insights on how to navigate these complex and contr...

Send us Fan Mail Do you ever feel like lust and pornography are taking over your life, and you can't break free from their grasp? What if I told you that lust isn't the real issue at hand, but rather our inability to truly see the world and the people around us? In this eye-opening episode, I share a powerful story from the memoir "The Glass Castle" that illustrates this concep...

Send us Fan Mail What does Jesus teach us about sex and gender, and how can we apply that to the complex and controversial topic of transgenderism? With humble hearts and minds, we turn to Scripture and the historic teachings of the  church to understand how to respond as Christians. Join us as we examine the original plan for creation in Genesis 1 and 2, and explore Jesus's teachings in Matt...

Send us Fan Mail What if we told you that you have the power to redefine beauty and truly appreciate your spouse's appearance, imperfections and all? Join us in this eye-opening episode as we uncover powerful insights on how to retrain our minds, heavily influenced by media and pornography, to recognize and delight in our partner's beauty, even as they age or change. Together, we'll...

Send us Fan Mail Do you need to look at your past? If you want freedom from unwanted sexual behavior? Do you need to go back there? Do you need to think about mom and dad and kids at school and wounds you experienced if you want to be free? We're going to talk about that in today's podcast. Now, when we talk about looking at our pasts, we are not talking about blaming wounds we've e...

Send us Fan Mail When you find yourself lacking desire for your spouse, I would invite you to look somewhere else. I want to invite you to look at how you feel about yourself.  How good I feel about yourself is usually more of the underlying reason why you lack desire for your spouse, then your spouse's. It really has to do with you. So let me unpack that a little bit. When you look in the mi...

Send us Fan Mail In this podcast, we are talking about your imagination. We who are seeking sexual integrity know the problem of how our mind can get us into trouble with sexual thoughts, sexual fantasies, and sexual imaginings that lead us down a path. It can start with just a small thought that seems to kind of drift into our brain. Then something inside grabs a hold of it. And we muse on it. An...

Send us Fan Mail So many people have ceilings on how far they can go in life. Some ceilings come from what people say is or isn’t possible as it pertains to change and transformation. In our culture many believe there is a ceiling with those who wrestle with same sex attraction or men in general, that they  will always struggle with lust and have no possibility of change. On the other side there a...

Send us Fan Mail I want to talk today about a little bit of a dichotomy that a lot of people experience in their journey towards sexual integrity. If you've listened to this podcast for any length of time, or been involved in our coaching, groups, or events, I hope that you've picked up on the reality that we seek to bring the love and grace of God into all things. We believe that real l...

Send us Fan Mail If you are tuning into this podcast you are either wrestling with or striving for sexual integrity or love someone who is struggling with sexual integrity, or you just care about this topic. I believe as we take a look at a small part in Jesus' life we find a very big revelation. God had a design for human beings. They were designed to reflect the image of the invisible God....

Send us Fan Mail When we are pursuing sexual integrity, we all experience this mental combat between sexual sin and our desire for sexual integrity.  It’s not just an experience we have in our thought life alone. We feel it in our bodies when they become aroused by things we see, the thoughts we have, and by the longings we have. One of the ways we try to combat and move away from our sexual orien...

Send us Fan Mail In today's podcast, I have three simple mental shifts for you. These three simple changes you can make will help you in your journey toward sexual integrity. It is my aim that these small mental adjustments will help you see how you should approach your journey for sexual integrity in a fresh light. Mental Shifts 1. From this as an opportunity to sin to this as an opportunity...

Send us Fan Mail Have you ever wanted to stop something so badly, yet couldn’t figure out how to stop. Or even why? Have you tried to stop lusting? In this weeks podcast, just speaks to the importance of learning to love in recovery from unwanted sexual behavior, rather than just focusing on stopping the behavior. Key takeaways: The goal of recovery should be to learn to love in a self-giving way,...

Send us Fan Mail Living in a digital age, we are faced with the reality that we have tough competition. That the internet is competing for our attention, our affection, for our questions, and our devotion. Today we will talk about this competition and what it provides; especially in the area of sexual integrity.  Whether it's a struggle with pornography, or looking for hookups. So often, we a...

Send us Fan Mail To start I want to let you know this podcast will be a little different. One that I hope will be helpful for you. I am going to talk about the difference between arousal and desire. The reason that’s so important for us to recognize is that when we feel arousal towards something that we know we don’t want, it can produce an amount of shame for us. If you’re pursuing sexual integri...

Send us Fan Mail In today’s podcast, I’m going to be answering a question that was emailed to us. Is it okay for a man to masturbate while fantasizing about his wife? We encourage you to send us your questions, as I really love to answer some of the things that you all are experiencing and facing. So the question I got this week was from a guy who's involved in an accountability group. The gu...

Send us Fan Mail How free can you be? How free? Can you be? In some version or another, this is a question that we get a lot, especially for people who are just starting their journey towards sexual integrity. They've wrestled with their specific attractions and temptations and are wondering, is this going to be a part of my life forever? Can I actually be free? Can real change happen for me?...

Send us Fan Mail In Genesis when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and there was a delight to the eyes, and the tree was to be desired to make one wise she took of its fruit and ate. What did she see? The enemy when he tempts us wants us to see something. But the truth is, what he wants us to see is not reality. She saw something that wasn’t actually there. And the enemy does the same...

Send us Fan Mail At the core of every sexual integrity problem is relational brokenness. Because God created sex to be relational, it is relational down to its core. And so if you are dealing with a sexual issue, you are dealing with a relational issue. What is a partner or group for accountability? It's a certain kind of connection. As a result, if you have a relational brokenness in your li...

Send us Fan Mail If you are wrestling with unwanted sexual behaviors or recurring sexual behaviors, and want to get free, you have to know the why behind the what? What is the why, behind your specific what? So for example, if you struggle with pornography, and you're typically looking for a certain kind or genre, types of people, gender, or specific sexual acts in the pornography? What'...

Send us Fan Mail There are just things you don't talk about at church, right? Absolutely not! I think the church is meant to be a place where we talk about the things that are really the most difficult to talk about in life. If we can't do that in our church community, where will we do it? Certainly, one of those topics is sex. Both in its beautiful, glorious holy intention that God desi...