Adventures of Des and Cort

Send us Fan Mail We laughed, we ranted, we asked trees for emotional support. 🌳😭 This week’s episode is brought to you by exhaustion, unhinged headlines, and the absolute audacity of people who park like they’re in a bumper car arena. 🚗💥 We’re coming down from the post-event high (read: crash), which means everything annoys us just a little bit more than usual. Like family members putting thin...

Send us Fan Mail 🚨 Warning: We’re operating at peak delusion this week and honestly? It’s working for us. 😎✨ In this episode of Delulu Is The Only Solulu , we unravel the pure chaos that is planning a golf tournament 🏌️‍♀️⛳ (if spreadsheets were edible, we’d be stress-snacking on them). But mark our words—we’re about to host the best damn golf event this town has ever seen 💅💥. We chat about...

Send us Fan Mail This week’s episode is full of ✨closet meltdowns, chaotic would-you-rathers, and a surprising amount of bathroom talk,✨you're welcome in advance. We kick things off with a fashion crisis. Shopping when your brain is running on 47 tabs and a half-charged mental battery? Impossible. 🧠 Des is loyal to her high-rise jeans…but not too baggy, please! Cort, on the other hand, has...

Send us Fan Mail 🚨 BOLO!🚨 (Be On the Lookout…Cort just realized what that means and we’re never letting it go 🤣) In this episode, we’re covering all the chaos, cringe, and country living struggles you never knew you needed. Cort kicks us off with a HOT (literally) flash about losing power in the middle of nowhere 🏡⚡aka, no water, no showers, and lots of questioning life choices. Because when...

Send us Fan Mail 🚀 Buckle up, Besties this episode is flying straight to the moon …and it’s full of hot flashes, high brows, and zero tolerance for bad behavior. 😤🔥 This week, we’re ranting about disrespectful kids on the golf course (WHERE are your parents? ⛳️👀), and shady corporations dragging small businesses to try and keep your business (the audacity 🙄💼). We romanticize the heck out of...

Send us Fan Mail Old Man Energy has officially entered the chat… and it’s wearing readers 👓, yelling “HUHHH?” at full volume, and making sure we stretch before walking briskly 🧍‍♀️‍➡️🧍‍♀️💨. We’re recapping our Bingo event 🎉 (shoutout to all the Besties that showed up 💕), plus another event where Des won a prize 🏆 but immediately went into full panic mode at the idea of attention 😳. She tri...

Send us Fan Mail Buckle up, besties—this episode is a ride. 🎢 First up, we need to talk about 1923 and how Spencer is STILL trying to get back to the ranch. Like, sir… we know it’s the early 1900s, but even a homing pigeon would’ve made it by now. 🦅⏳ Then, we dive into the chaos that is Lori Vallow’s latest interview, where she fully doubled down on her delusions. The audacity? Unmatched. The d...

Send us Fan Mail 🚨 YIKES! 🚨The only word that truly captures this week’s absolute mess.   First up: battling insurance for the 4th time like it’s the Hunger Games except instead of a bow and arrow, we have a 3-hour hold time and a slowly dying will to live. 🎯📞🙃   Then, being exposed by the kids because they repeat things we probably shouldn’t have said to them. Who knew that your mom tells yo...

Send us Fan Mail Buckle up, b*tches…this week’s episode is a wild ride through salty confessions, defiant energy, and our refusal to be compliant with… well, pretty much anything. Salty, Defiant, and Extremely Noncompliant is exactly what you'd expect from us…chaotic, hilarious, and slightly concerning.    🔥 Hot Flash Alert: Dating in your 30s, 40s, and 50s sounds like an extreme sport, and...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we’re living proof that money can’t buy happiness… but we’re pretty sure it could rent it for a while. 🤷‍♀️ We kick things off by bitching just enough to clear our chakras before getting back to being grateful or whatever. If only we were trust fund babies, we’d be out here living our best lives…golfing, gym’ing, vacationing, and swiping the Black Card like we’re in a...

Send us Fan Mail From peaceful getaways to public health violations, this one is a ride. Buckle up.   Des took a relaxing trip with her sister to Hagerman, soaking in the peace and quiet… until a mom decided to change a full-on code-brown diaper right on the breakfast table. 🍳💩 Bon appétit! Meanwhile, Cort’s hot flash is all about Negative Nancys, you know, the people who wouldn’t be happy even...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we’re diving into Hot Girl Water Walks because who wouldn’t want to spend their days power-walking through the pool, gossiping, and wrapping it all up with a 9 PM bedtime? Cort just got back from living her best retired life in AZ, staying with her Tia in a community that has figured it out…sunrises, golf, cocktails, and concerts where nobody stands up. Who needs rowdy...

Send us Fan Mail This week, Des and Cort revel in their Valentine's Day Luxury aka letting their husbands cook while they sat back sipping cocktails like queens. They tackle the age-old debate: do you sleep with your bedroom door open or closed? (Spoiler: One of them is clearly wrong.) Cort shares a high school nightmare where she is lost in the hallways, desperate to find class and not be la...

Send us Fan Mail You know those people who think their way is the way? Yeah, we’re calling them out. Whether it’s what time you work out, where you work from, or how you live your life—who cares? Still sweating, still making money, still thriving. Let people live.   We also get into how people assume we’re the same person, like a two-for-one deal, (besties for the restie) in reality, we’re just th...

Send us Fan Mail 🚗 Two C*nts in a Car 🚗 is here, and we’re taking you on a ride through pure chaos. 🎢   We’re covering all the important things in life:   😤 Sounds that enrage us when we’re hormonal (why is breathing so loud?!)   🐈 Des’s unwanted feline squatter (the neighbors swear it’s not theirs)   🛻 Winter finally arriving—except it’s just mud everywhere   📸 Why every photo shoot makes...

Send us Fan Mail This episode starts with a literal bang! Our neighbor shot off a blank in his office, and we heard everything. Nothing like a little unplanned adrenaline rush to kick things off. 😳🔫   Our Hot Flashes this week?   - Doing business with friends & family (aka, do we really want to lose this relationship over business)   - Hormones making us feel like we have the IQ of a potato...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we’re diving headfirst into the chaos of the inauguration—Bush’s funny face included (someone get that man a comedy special). We also had a few Hot Flashes that got us heated: kids vandalizing like wannabe graffiti artists, people ignoring No Parking signs like they’re suggestions, and noise pollution that made us consider throwing our own neighborhood rave just to see...

Send us Fan Mail Fun Bags 🎉🥂:   Once upon a time, we were the queens of chaos—pool-hopping at 3 a.m., closing down strip clubs, and Des pulling epic Irish goodbyes at the bar. Now? Two drinks, a gallon of water, and a full dinner later, we wake up feeling like we got hit by a bus. 🥴   This week, we’re spilling the tea on trying to be fun again in 2025. We recount our wild past (RIP to Wine Wedn...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we’re tackling the chaos of air travel—why do some people think airline rules are just polite suggestions? And who gave the loudest person on the flight the mic to narrate their life story? 🎤🙉   We dive into the rocky start of 2025 with the bombings and fires in California. We are over people who think that because they have money it makes them immune to disaster or h...

Send us Fan Mail The week between Christmas and New Year’s: a vortex of snacks, naps, and asking what day it is. We dive into the black hole week phenomenon, share our delightfully low-key Christmas stories, and discuss the very relatable struggle of realizing pullout couches are the enemy of 40-something backs. 🛋️💀   Des reveals her plans for an Arizona getaway 🌵☀️, we talk about testing the li...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we’re joined by Cort’s son, Izaak, for a hilariously candid episode full of college tales, childhood memories, and one VERY specific story involving a guy (possibly on drugs) yelling for Izaak to help him "handle business." Spoiler: glasses are apparently a beacon for street justice. 😳👀   Izaak shares what he's learned since moving away, dishes out some...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we're diving into Christmas with a naughty twist 🎄😂. Cort shares the origin story of Whore in a Drawer—a raunchy, rebellious Barbie alter-ego created a decade ago to cheer Des up. (It worked.) We also tackle important holiday debates like real vs. fake trees, white lights vs. colored lights, and whether an hour-long saxophone performance of Christmas music on a p...

Send us Fan Mail Buckle up—this episode’s a chaotic cocktail of cringe, comedy, and a little conspiracy. Cort kicks things off with a “reply all” email fail so explicit it might land her on an HR PowerPoint. Meanwhile, Des channels her inner Sherlock Holmes, taking us on the unforgettable journey of how her curiosity led to an accidental dick pic discovery during a Facebook deep dive. Spoiler: cur...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we ponder what we’d do if martial law was enacted (Des would be a hot mess, and Cort would definitely test the boundaries—naturally). Plus, the latest episode of Cory's Sleep Chronicles features him attempting to turn on a lamp... in his dreams. Life lately? We’re perpetually sleepy but forcing ourselves out to socialize, and every time we do, we remember just how...

Send us Fan Mail This week, we handed over the mic to none other than Dee—Des’s mom, the headbutt queen, and unofficial boss of everything. 💁‍♀️ From hilarious stories of Des growing up, to Dee’s first impression of Cortnie, this episode is equal parts roast and toast. 🔥🍞   We’re talking:   - Dee’s unique punishment methods (spoiler: headbutts were involved) 🤕   - What we’re thankful for this...