A Jaded Gay

From social media to cover models, society has an obsession with body image, which we all struggle with. But for gay men, our bodies tend to be objectified and labeled to define our worth. In this episode, we’re discussing why gay men tend to obsess over their bodies, the negative impacts this has had on our physical and mental health, and how we can treat ourselves and our bodies with kindness. A...

The term gaydar, a colloquialism referring to the intuitive ability of a person to assess another’s sexual orientation, has been thrown around casually in the media and among the gay community. However, is there any truth to this concept? In this episode, we take a look at the early origins of gaydar, the science behind the phenomenon, and how advancements in technology may be able to identify a p...

In America, there has been a decrease in the number of teenagers who’ve received formalized sex education over the years. And for LGBTQ+ youth, inclusive sex education is practically nonexistent. In this episode, we’re taking a look at the current state of sex education in America, the lack of inclusive education for LGTQ+ youth, and how we can be advocates for inclusive, formalized sex education....

At the start of a romantic relationship, it’s exciting to receive positive affirmations and affection from your partner. However, if this affection becomes exaggerated and excessive, it can lead to a manipulative cycle of abuse. In this episode, we look into what love bombing is, common red flags, and how to heal after being love bombed. Additional Resources: Love Bombing (Psychology Today) Spotti...

The history of horror goes back more than 250 years and has depicted queer themes since its origins. From Frankenstein to Freddy Krueger, horror has always been queer. In this episode, we’re taking a look at the history of the horror genre, queer coded representation in horror literature and film, and modern-day depictions of queer characters. Additional Resources: Britannica - Horror Story Gothic...

On October 8, 1998, a 21-year-old college student was picked up from a gay bar, tortured, and murdered because of his sexuality in a state that had no hate crime laws to protect him. More than twenty years later, we continue to remember his life and legacy. In this episode, we discuss the brutal murder of Matthew Shepard, the United States’ reaction, and the impact this tragic event had in bringin...

Many of us grew up knowing we were different than our peers, feeling like being “other” and fearing rejection at an early age. Therefore, it’s no surprise that gay men experience increased rates of anxiety compared to their straight peers. In this episode, we’re taking a look at anxiety disorders, unique factors that negatively impact gay men’s mental health, and strategies we can implement to bet...

Previously, we discussed our iconic pop queens and how their songs typically fit into distinct categories that hit an emotional button that appeals to gay men. In this episode, we kick off the inaugural Gay Icons deep dive with none other than…Kylie Minogue. The highest-selling female Australian artist of all time, Kylie’s career has spanned five decades and taught us how to be vulnerable and resi...

It’s no secret that cities are typically more tolerant of the LGBTQ+ community, and a larger city allows for greater opportunities in general, as well as a larger dating pool. But how did the iconic gay neighborhoods we all know and love come to be? In this episode, we're taking a look at the history of gay villages, their core themes that attract LGBTQ+ people, and how gayborhoods have falle...

We’re all familiar with the F word (rhymes with maggot) and, unfortunately, we’ve probably been called it at some point in our lives. But where did this slur come from? In this episode, we’re taking a look into the etymology of the word and discussing its reclamation by some in the LGBTQ+ community. Additional Resources: Oxford English Dictionary The Fa-Word: An Insulting Slur In the Spotlight The...

We previously talked about the concept of interpersonal vulnerability and why it can be harder for gay men to open up to a significant other. However, connection is an integral part of life—especially when it comes to romantic relationships. In this episode, we’re going deeper by discussing the importance of connecting with your partner through building emotional intimacy. Additional Resources: Em...

It’s been seven months since Russia invaded Ukraine, which has had global repercussions. However, an often-overlooked area of this tragic situation is the threat this invasion imposes upon LGBTQ+ Ukrainians. In this episode, we’re taking a look at LGBTQ+ rights in Ukraine and the unique impacts the Russian invasion has had on LGBTQ+ Ukrainians. Additional Resources: State-sponsored Homophobia: A W...

This past spring, Florida made headlines for its Parental Rights in Education Act, informally referred to as the Don’t Say Gay bill. While this legislation is disturbing, Florida is not the first state to implement such a bill. In fact, approximately 20 other states implemented similar Don’t Say Gay bills between January and April 2022. In this episode, we’re taking a look at what the Florida Pare...

In between the politics of the Stonewall Riots and the AIDS pandemic, disco emerged as a haven for gay men to escape the confines of heterosexuality. In this episode, we’re taking a look at the history of disco, its queer roots, and how its legacy continues through today’s pop music – despite bigoted anti-disco movements in the late seventies. Additional Resources: Turn the Beat Around: The Secret...

With all the shirtless, thirst pics on dating apps, it’s easy to get *ahem* distracted. But we must stay focused on attracting the right kinds of guys into our life. In this episode, we’re going to reflect on the qualities we're attracted to in a potential partner and the power of manifestation so we can improve our dating lives. Additional Resources: Can Single People 'Manifest' a...

In 1960s New York City, the Mafia needed a place to conduct business without police detection and gay men needed a safe space to socialize without being arrested. The result: the Genovese family ended up controlling the majority of gay bars in Greenwich Village, which was emerging as a gay hub at the time. In this episode, we’re diving into this unlikely partnership that eventually led to the expl...

The word “ally” gets tossed around frequently, but what does it actually mean? In this episode, Cheyenne Filipczyk joins us to discuss what it means to be an LGBTQ+ ally and how we can advocate for others in the community.  Additional Resources: What is an LGBTQIA+ Ally, and How Can I Be a Good One? 10 Ways to Be an Ally & a Friend Quiz: What Do You Know About Gay Rights? There is Literally No...

John Bowlby’s attachment theory suggests that humans are born with a need to form a close emotional bond. For gay men, social stressors, such as discrimination and rejection, can negatively impact their attachment system and result in unhealthy romantic attachments. In this episode, we take a look at the four distinct attachment styles and their respective characteristics so we can better understa...

Amidst the AIDS pandemic, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) banned gay and bisexual men from ever being eligible to donate blood to protect people receiving blood transfusions from the possibility of getting infected with HIV. Almost 30 years later, science has provided us with new drugs to better protect ourselves from HIV exposures and technology to improve HIV testing by providing quicker...

Growing up in a heteronormative society, we may have learned to believe that our gay identity was a weakness. As a result, we’ve developed the need to be perfect to manage the feeling of being an outsider. In this episode, we’re discussing what perfectionism in gay men looks like and how we can learn to accept our imperfections. Additional Resources: Perfectionism 7 Signs You’re Too Much of a Perf...

We previously talked about the importance of LGBTQ+ representation in TV and film and the “gay renaissance” of the 90s. While shows like Ellen and Will & Grace were groundbreaking at the time, they tended to skirt around LGBTQ+ issues and themes...but Queer as Folk did not shy away. In this episode, we’re dissecting the sexually charged, unapologetic serial drama, including the original Britis...

No matter how long we’ve been out of the closet, many of us hold on to some of the antigay beliefs we were exposed to as children and turn that negativity inwards. In this episode, we’ll dive into internalized homophobia and how we can practice self-compassion to overcome negative attitudes in an effort to live authentically. Additional Resources: Internalized Homophobia, Intimacy, and Sexual Beha...

We spend approximately one-third of our lives at work, yet many of us struggle with being out in the workplace. And while many companies have tried to increase their DEI efforts, being out at work can still be uncomfortable. In this episode, we’re talking about the ins and outs (no pun intended) of bringing our authentic selves to work and how we can create greater visibility for the LGBTQ+ commun...

Every Pride, we see corporations proudly display their rainbow logos and merchandise…but what happens to all that on July 1? In this episode, we dive into the commercialization and commodification of Pride and how some corporations are padding the pockets of anti-LGBTQ+ politicians while donning their faux rainbows. Additional Resources: Why LGBT Pride Festivals Have Become Increasingly Corporate...

Making new friends as an adult is difficult for anyone, but for gay men, it can be even harder to find a network of like-minded peers. In this episode, we’re discussing ways you can put your authentic self out there and other opportunities to find your community. Support the show Get Your Merch