9 Lives - Drunk Stoned and Stupid to Happy Joyous and Free

First party with Phillipe, the Peruvian drug dealer. The one night that changed my life (and not in a good way) more than any other. The defining moment that would change the trajectory of my life for the next decade.

The Devil is not some red cartoonish figure with horns and a pitchfork. The Devil isn't red at all. The Devil is white. The Devil is cocaine.

It takes about 60 seconds to change everything. Once it hits you, it hooks you. It grabs you in its death grip and never lets go. It greets you with a rush of adrenaline unlike anything you've ever experienced before.  The Devil is not red. The Devil is white. White powder. the Devil is Cocaine.

On the way to meet my father I plowed into a drug dealer... In a lucky twist of fate it was one of the rare times that I was actually sober.

In the rooms of AA we often say we're lucky we're not dead or in prison. This is my first legitimate attempt at getting my ass thrown in prison for at least 10-20. 

Every young man has a woman or two that they let get away, and they live with the regret. In this case it probably saved my life.

What happens when  you have no clue what the hell you're doing but do it anyway? From blatant, criminal defrauding of the Federal Government to flooding an entire block with sewage...But hey... I was just following orders!! 

Chad Hughes and his associates were slumlords, pure and simple. This is my introduction to the "Real" world. 

Where my contracting career began and my virginity ended.

Instead of writing a 5000 word Sociology term paper, why not write a Rock and Roll "Cantata" instead? The story of how I became a rock god in my own brain.

LIFE 2... This is where it starts getting "FUN." Let's start with a vodka fueled 7th grade middle school dance shall we?

Is it brain damage or just stupidity? With no filter between my brain and my mouth, or in this case m brain and my body, the havoc is unbelievable.

The ultimate insult of choosing music over football was the final straw for my father. I ruined his life and destroyed all of his dreams of being the father of a superstar.

A brief introduction to the book, the program and Bob. By Bob's dearest friend, Jeff G. (Scottish Jeff)

Let's play a game of roust the 19 year old punk stoner.

What happens when 20 or more drunk teenagers descend upon a commercial orange grove.

An old man sits on his porch, dead, for three days.

Meet the author and narrator. A quick glimpse into the madness.

Where it all began; drinking with Grandma at 5 years old.

The hilarious and cringeworthy story of the ruined Thanksgiving dinner.