The Overwhelmed Brain

Your friends and family really want the best for you. But what are they going to say when they see you make a decision they believe is just crazy? I explore that very topic in this episode. A woman writes to me and tells me she's taking a break from her husband after telling her friends and family how awful he was. She has no idea to face them and tell them the news.

Do you feel bad for what you did? Do you feel guilty? How long ago was it? Is feeling guilt a necessary component of healing? In this episode, someone feels guilty for moving on without their friends from the past and wants to know how to stop. Their life has improved and they've never felt better. But that guilt...

The past shapes who we are today. Sometimes, that past is also what haunts us today. And sometimes, it even torments others even when we don't mean to. Digging into ourselves can be the hardest step toward mental and emotional strength, but it is almost always makes us stronger - and maybe even happier.

Unfortunately, there are people in the world who will never see your worth. They may, in fact, be incapable of seeing anything past their own judgments. That can be tough to deal with sometimes, especially if these people are supposed to be close.

This is a sleep episode. Listen when you're ready to go to sleep. Make sure your podcast app doesn't automatically play another episode as it might wake you up. This episode has a long silence at the end. Enjoy your slumber. There are no sponsors or ads in this episode - No interruptions.

You may encounter situations where a friend or family member is closely involved with someone whose behavior is toxic or dysfunctional. While they may be unaware of the adverse impact of their partner or friend, it becomes a different story when this person enters your life. How do you handle when someone you care about brings a person you strongly dislike into your personal space? What if you bel...

How deep do you have to dig in order to figure out who you are? What do you need in yourself and for yourself so that when you connect with others, you are connecting from that deeper, authentic place inside you? It can be a spiritual journey for some, but there are practical methods to understand yourself at the deepest level.

Some people have an existential dread surrounding death and dying. For some, death remains a profound mystery, while others hold steadfast beliefs about what lies beyond. Regardless of where you stand, if the fear of death consumes your thoughts, we need to talk about it. My hope is that this episode will offer you a fresh perspective on this inevitable aspect of life. Stick around until the end,...

When people you care about put their attention on other things, like games or their phone, you may feel like they are ignoring and even neglecting you. If they are, that doesn't feel very good. What should you do? Tell them get off their phone or else? Or is there a better way to get their attention?

What happens when there is a huge challenge in a relationship, perhaps where one person wrongs the other in some way, and the relationship changes for the worst... forever? Can it be salvaged? Is it over? Can there be a different "new normal" after a long resentment? All questions I try to answer in this episode.

Is the landscape of your mind your private sanctuary filled with thoughts and imaginings that may not always be suitable for others to hear about? What do you do when someone urges you to reveal your innermost thoughts—especially those that could potentially offend them? Is full disclosure always the best policy, or do you have the right to keep some of what happens in your mind sacred?

As adults, we have the right to make decisions that others may disagree with. While they may point out the risks, the decision eventually falls on our shoulders. And making certain decisions in the face of trusted friends' and family's opposition can be quite challenging.

The up and down, or high and low, of any relationship or circumstance can wear you down until you are worn out completely. But can we get addicted to the ups and downs? Can our desire for the next high point keep us in a situation that makes us unhappy? That's the subject I explore today.

Changing how you respond to and cope with challenges can improve your relationships and life overall. When you're getting the same, bad results over and over again, it might be time for a new perspective to help you create better outcomes.

Asserting yourself is an act of self-love, not aggression. It's about recognizing your worth and preventing future conflicts. Don't let guilt from past experiences hold you back from showing that you are worthy of standing up for.

What happens when you can't get along with someone because no matter how much patching up you think you've done, it's still not enough? Is there an end to this process? Will they ever want to forgive and forget?

When you get a therapist, coach, or healer, you can run into what might be called a "human" experience - the kind of experience where the people-helpers in our life might have some of their own stuff to deal with, and they intentionally or unintentionally bring that stuff into the professional environment. When that happens, can their help still be effective? Should you continue working with them?...

Life brings us huge lessons. We can learn and grow from them, or we can allow them to hold us back. Some lessons, however, were definitely worth the hardship - especially ones that change life for the better.

I once called judgment "the ultimate relationship destroyer." Judgmental and critical behavior toward those you love will make them love you less. It's a fact. It's undeniable. And if you want to keep people in your life, it's important to understand what breaks down what could be a great connection to someone you love.

Dwelling on an event in the past can keep you there. It can occupy your brain every day until you can think of nothing else, causing you to miss what's right in front of you. This kind of obsessive thinking can make life pass by, and you may not even realize it.

A friend or family member does behavior that you find immoral or maybe even illegal. Do you keep the connection because they are a great person otherwise, or do you move on staying in alignment with yourself? It can be a tricky thing to navigate such a challenge.

What is your responsibility when it comes to your emotional state? Can others control how you feel? Do they have that power? We're told that we can choose our emotional state, but I just don't think it's that easy when we're dealing with people that know exactly how we operate.

Just how can we navigate through life's challenges and overcome overwhelm? The path to overcoming overwhelm can sometimes look a lot different than you think. Addressing the weight of negative emotions can begin the process and perhaps even resolve the conflict you're holding on to.

When you compromise your wants and needs, especially because you believe it will benefit others, you erode your deeper sense of self and happiness. Do that for years, and you can dig yourself a hole so deep, it may feel impossible to crawl out and find happiness again.

What do you do when someone you care about withdraws and simply can't cope with [you, work, life, etc,]? Do you let them be? Do you try to talk them through it, acting like their therapist or coach? Sometimes it's difficult to communicate with someone who didn't learn how to express themselves or deal with stress. Sometimes you just have to take a different path to connect.