The Leader in You

How do you stay connected with a coworker whose political views differ from yours? In this episode of The Leader in You , Paulina and Dr. Lola explore how leaders can navigate sensitive conversations while building trust and emotional safety. Through the story of two coworkers and an unexpected campaign sign, they share how vulnerability and care turned a moment of tension into a deeper connection...

“You’re not tired.” “That’s not what happened.” “We’re doing it my way.” Could these everyday responses be quietly disconnecting us from the people who matter most? In this episode of The Leader in You , we explore how dismissing someone’s feelings can fuel conflict—and how patterns learned in childhood follow us into the workplace. From parenting moments to team disagreements and a discussion of...

What happens when leaders make emotional connection part of everyday work? In this episode of The Leader in You , hosts Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian welcome back Dr. Jaime Goff and Aric Bostick to reflect on their presentation at the ATD OrgDev Conference. Together, they explore how attachment science, emotional awareness, and small moments of connection can help leaders build trust and na...

What can you do when a conflict leaves you hurt, overwhelmed, or stuck—and the other person isn’t ready to talk? This week on The Leader in You , Paulina and Dr. Lola explore how to use the EmC Reconnection Process on your own to understand your emotions and prepare for a difficult conversation. Through a personal story, Dr. Lola walks through identifying triggers, recognizing sensitivities, namin...

What do healthcare leaders and elementary school students have in common? They both need tools to work through conflict and reconnect. In this episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola and Paulina share stories from their training at Renown Health and from a classroom of fourth, fifth, and sixth graders. Through the EMC Reconnection Process, they explore how naming feelings, recognizing protective b...

What happens when three people who teach emotional connection actually find themselves in a real conflict together? In this episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld, Polina Marian, and returning guest Aric Bostick sit down in Reno after a dinner conversation unexpectedly turned into a moment of real disconnection. Rather than avoiding the tension, brushing it aside, or simply apologizing...

Sometimes the words “I’m fine” mean exactly that. But sometimes, they are a way of covering hurt, fear, shame, or a sense of disconnection that feels too difficult to put into words. In recognition of Suicide Prevention Month, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore an important question: How can leaders create an environment where people feel safe enough to say when they are struggling? In t...

When your team is already overwhelmed, talking about emotions can feel like one more task. But what if those conversations are what help everyone regain focus and move forward? In this episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore how the EMC process brings structure to difficult conversations, helping leaders move beyond blame and understand the emotions beneath work...

What makes people feel safe enough to trust, connect, and thrive at work? In this episode, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian sit down with speaker and educator Aric Bostick to explore how attachment science can transform the way we think about leadership. Aric shares why he believes attachment is one of the missing pieces in building trust and resilience—and why a leader’s own sense of security...

What does it really mean to be a secure leader—and why does emotional connection matter so much when the pressure is on? In Episode 104 of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina welcome back Dr. Jaime Goff , author of The Secure Leader , for a powerful conversation about how attachment science can transform the way leaders build trust, navigate difficult conversations, and create strong...

Five years after the original release of Emotional Connection , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and co-author Ramin Sedehi reunite to reflect on what they have learned about emotions, trust, leadership, and relationships—and celebrate the launch of the book’s second edition. At the heart of their conversation is a powerful idea: when conflict happens, we often focus on what was said, what happened, or who was...

When someone on your team suddenly stops speaking up, stops pushing back, or simply nods along, it can be easy to assume everything is fine. But silence doesn’t always mean peace. Sometimes, silence is a sign of hurt, disconnection, or a relationship that no longer feels safe. In this episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina explore what workplace silence may really be communic...

When trauma enters the workplace, leaders often focus on getting everyone "back to work." But what if the fastest path forward is helping people feel emotionally safe first? In this episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore how leaders can help employees navigate loss, conflict, unexpected change, and other traumatic workplace experiences without leaving...

When conflict arises, our first instinct is often to become critical—of others, of ourselves, or of the situation. But what if the most powerful response isn't criticism at all? What if it's curiosity? In this milestone 100th episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina explore how curiosity transforms the way we experience conflict. Instead of reacting with blame, judgme...

Have you ever walked away from a difficult conversation thinking, "I don't even know what happened—I just know it didn't go well" ? When emotions become overwhelming, our thoughts race, our reactions become automatic, and meaningful conversations quickly fall apart. Yet beneath what feels like emotional chaos are predictable patterns that can be understood, organized, and trans...

When a highly publicized interaction between Caitlin Clark and her coach, Stephanie White, captured national attention, many people focused on the visible behavior. We saw frustration, conflict, and what appeared to be defiance. But what if there was something much deeper happening? In this episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina explore this situation through the lens of Emot...

What if the greatest skill for navigating team conflict isn't better communication—it's relentless empathy ? In this episode, Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina explore why empathy is one of the most important skills leaders, managers, HR professionals, and L&D practitioners can develop to create emotionally safe, high-performing teams. When team members become frustrated, defensive, or w...

Most onboarding programs teach new employees how to do the job. Few teach them how to navigate the relationships. In this episode of The Leader in You Podcast, Dr. Lola and Polina discuss one of the most overlooked gaps in employee onboarding: preparing new hires to recognize, navigate, and address team conflict before they become part of it. When employees join a new team, they don't enter a...

At the ATD Conference, we noticed a common theme: many leaders and learning professionals were excited about innovation and AI, yet hesitant when it came to navigating emotions, vulnerability, and human connection in the workplace. That tension inspired this conversation on emotional ambivalence —the experience of feeling pulled in two directions at the same time.  In this episode, Lola and Polina...

After returning from the ATD Conference, one thing kept staying with us. Yes, AI was everywhere. It was in sessions, at booths, and woven into conversations about the future of work. But what stood out most wasn't technology at all. It was people. In this episode of The Leader in You , Dr. Lola Gershfeld reconnects with Niamh Hannan and Aoife O'Brien to reflect on their experience after...

In this special live episode from the ATD Conference in Los Angeles, Dr. Lola Gershfeld welcomes returning guest Aoife O'Brien, author of Thriving Talent and host of the Happier at Work Podcast , for a thought-provoking conversation about one of the biggest questions leaders face today: As AI becomes more integrated into the workplace, what happens to the human connections that help people fe...

What really causes disengagement at work? Is it a lack of motivation, poor communication, or something deeper? Broadcasting live from the ATD Conference in Los Angeles, Dr. Lola Gershfeld, Polina Marian, and Niamh Hannan explore the hidden emotional patterns that shape workplace relationships and team performance. Together, they unpack new research showing the powerful impact managers have on empl...

In this deeply personal and insightful episode of The Leader in You Podcast , Dr. Lola Gershfeld and Polina Marian explore why workplace relationships can feel so emotionally intense—and why conflict at work often has roots far deeper than communication skills alone. Drawing from attachment science, emotional connection research, and real workplace examples, they unpack how the patterns we learned...

What if the biggest challenge in your workplace isn’t culture… but disconnection? In this episode, we explore a powerful insight from the recent SIOP Conference:  No matter where people come from—different countries, languages, or backgrounds—the way they respond to disconnection looks strikingly the same. Through real stories—from a multicultural workplace to a transformative meeting in South Kor...

What really happens in those moments when emotions take over at work? In this episode of The Leader in You , we sit down with Karen Thrall, author of Don’t Lose Your Sh*t at Work, to explore the powerful patterns behind how we react under pressure—and why those reactions can either damage or deepen our relationships. Karen shares her deeply personal journey—from being a successful executive who st...