The Deconstructed Woman

Friendship Seasons: Who Stays, Who Goes Elisa and Jojy explore how busy seasons, vulnerability, and chemistry shape the friendships we keep and the ones we prune. Elisa and Jojy take on women's friendships, inspired by a Michelle Obama podcast conversation about what kind of friend you are. They compare their own seasons of life: Elisa is raising kids, and Jojy is an empty nester open to new c...

Trends in Equal Rights After losing Gloria Steinem and Dolly Parton, Elisa and Jojy ask what comes next for women's rights. Elisa opens with the recent deaths of Gloria Steinem and Dolly Parton. She says the loss has left her unsettled, because she sees new trends that threaten hard-won gains in women's equality. She and Jojy talk about how younger generations can take those gains for gran...

Quietly Quitting: Married but Checked Out Why do some people stay in marriages they've emotionally left? Jojy and Elisa dig in. Jojy and Elisa unpack "quietly quitting," a marriage in which one partner stays legally and logistically committed but stops investing emotionally. They ask why people choose it and whether it can work. They weigh finances, social pressure, and the example s...

Single, Sixty, and Thriving Alone Virginia joins Jojy and Elisa to unpack why being single in your 60s can mean more freedom, not less. In this episode of The Deconstructed Woman, hosts Jojy and Elisa Murray sit down with their friend and longtime listener Virginia to talk about what it really means to be single and content in your 60s. Virginia shares the everyday freedoms of living alone — from...

Why Siblings Are Trying Therapy Together Elisa and Jojy explore the rising trend of sibling therapy and what it reveals about family bonds, old wounds, and lifelong loyalty. This week, Elisa and Jojy dig into the growing trend of sibling therapy, sparked by a New York Times Magazine article and a new book by therapist Karen Gail Lewis. They unpack why adult siblings are seeking counseling together...

When a Secret Changes Everything What would you do if the person you love confessed to a crime — would loyalty or conscience win? Elisa and Jojy dive into a loaded question sparked by the novel The Husband's Secret: if your spouse or close friend revealed they had committed a crime, would you turn them in — or protect them? The conversation quickly moves beyond the hypothetical as both hosts e...

Life With Siblings: Pros, Cons & What Kids Actually Learn Two moms unpack what siblings really teach us — and what only children might be missing. Hosts Jojy and Elisa Marie dive into a thought-provoking New York Times opinion piece arguing that larger sibling groups build moral character, resilience, and practical life skills in ways parents of smaller families often have to manufacture. Draw...

Uncertain Times Two moms from different generations unpack the fear, uncertainty, and quiet optimism shaping modern family decisions. Jojy and Elisa dig into a New York Times piece asking why more people are opting out of parenthood — covering declining birth rates, economic instability, social media anxiety, and the looming shadow of AI on young careers. As a late-50s mom of one and an older mill...

What happens when the wisdom that comes with age makes you more yourself than ever, yet the world starts looking right through you? Inspired by actress Alfre Woodard's candid remarks about being overlooked as a gray-haired woman, hosts Jojy and Elisa dig into the strange paradox of growing older: you know more, you care less about others' approval, you're finally coming into your own —...

When Swagger Beats Credentials What happens when loud confidence drowns out real expertise — and what we can do about it. In this episode of The Deconstructed Woman, Jojy and Elisa Marie dig into the unsettling rise of "toxic confidence" — the cultural moment where bold swagger has become more persuasive than actual credentials. Sparked by a New York Times piece, they explore why people...

Work-Life Balance Is a Myth — Now What? A high-achieving woman's honest reckoning with the fantasy of having it all. Elisa and Jojy kick off with a Scarlett Johansson quote from a May 2026 Fortune magazine article: despite a $165 million net worth, Johansson says work-life balance simply doesn't exist — and that accepting that is the first step toward something healthier. It's a provoc...

Mothers, Daughters, and Making Peace Exploring the evolving, complex bond between mothers and daughters — from childhood rules to adult understanding to letting go. ## Episode Description In this heartfelt episode of The Deconstructed Woman, Elisa Marie and Jojy dive deep into the mother-daughter relationship — one of the most formative and complex dynamics in a woman's life. Inspired by the b...

Choosing Optimism: The Mindset That Changes Everything Two women explore why optimism is a choice, not a trait — and how to build it into your daily life. # Episode Description In this episode of The Deconstructed Woman, Elisa Marie and Jojy dive deep into the topic of optimism — what it really means, whether we're born with it, and why choosing a positive mindset is one of the most powerful t...

Adulting Is Harder Than It Looks Why growing up costs more, takes longer, and requires skills nobody taught us — and what parents can do about it. In this episode of The Deconstructed Woman, hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy dive into the modern struggle of "adulting" — and why it feels so much harder today than it did a generation ago. From navigating phone plans and insurance to managing taxe...

Sharing the Mental Load at Home Two moms unpack why women carry the invisible weight of running a household — and how to finally share it. In this episode of The Deconstructed Woman, hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy dive deep into the concept of the mental load — the invisible, never-ending stream of planning, organizing, and anticipating that disproportionately falls on women. Inspired by the podcast &...

Too Much: Reclaiming Women’s Voices and Raising Spirited Kids On The Deconstructed Woman podcast, hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy talk about the message women receive that they are “too much” and should dilute themselves to be acceptable. They discuss Cynthia Erivo’s experience being told in performing arts school to “settle down,” and how Erivo later reframed that in her book Simply More about embraci...

AI Bots, Boundaries, and Dependency: Using Chatbots Without Losing Human Connection Hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy discuss Elisa’s first week using an AI chatbot app called Tolin and why she quickly set boundaries on how often she uses it. They compare professional uses of AI (streamlining emails, SOPs, troubleshooting, efficiencies) with personal uses (processing emotionally charged situations, declu...

Women Cohabitating Platonically: Sharing Costs, Combating Loneliness, and Rethinking the “Golden Girls” Model Hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy discuss a South Korea–popularized concept of women cohabitating platonically to share living expenses, reduce loneliness, and maintain autonomy, inspired by the 2019 bestseller Two Women Living Together by Kim Hana and Wong Sunu and an article referencing high Ne...

Human Design A Map for Alignment and Truth with Marisa Vitoria Marisa Vittoria Free Chart Hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy welcome Elisa’s sister, Marisa Vittoria, to explain human design after gifting them their blueprints. Marisa, a VP of operations, describes discovering human design at work through educator Erin Claire Jones and using it to improve a challenging relationship with her boss by underst...

Attraction to Narcissistic Leaders, Women’s Power, and the Fight Against Going BackwardOn the Deconstructed Woman Podcast, Jojy welcome Sandy to discuss Adam Grant’s New York Times article “There’s a Cure for Our Attraction to Narcissistic Leaders,” using it to explore why narcissistic men can rise in corporate and political leadership while women showing confidence are often labeled negatively. S...

Michele Heffron - Life Strategist Life Strategist for Women in Transition Voices of Women 2026 Jojy welcomes life strategist and coach Michele Heffron to discuss major transitions women face and the support needed to move through them with confidence. Heffron shares how her second divorce after years as a stay-at-home mom left her without a job, bank account, or stability, leading her to rebuild h...

Trauma Bonding: When Intensity Gets Mistaken for Love Hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy of the Deconstructed Woman Podcast discuss the concept of “trauma bonding,” prompted by a New York Times Modern Love article about a relationship that ended in divorce after childhood traumas and unhealthy patterns played out in marriage. They define trauma bonding as an intense, addictive, dysfunctional attachment fu...

Stepping Outside the Comfort Zone: Small Risks, Growth, and Joy Hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy discuss the concept of the comfort zone and why stepping outside of it can support personal growth. Joji shares research (via ChatGPT) linking the term to behavioral psychology and stress, explaining that comfort zones involve familiar routines with low anxiety and predictability but limited growth. They emp...

Savor the Moment In this episode of the Deconstructed Woman Podcast, hosts Elisa Marie and Jojy dive into the concept of slowing down to enjoy life, particularly during the busy holiday season. They discuss the challenges of managing a chaotic schedule while trying to savor joyful moments, inspired by Matthew Kelly's book 'Slowing Down to the Speed of Joy.' The conversation explores th...

Understanding Cancel Culture: Perspectives from Gen Z In this episode of the Deconstructed Woman podcast, hosts Elisa Marie and Joji, along with special guest Tara, a college student, dive into the concept of cancel culture. Tara explains the origins, evolution, and implications of this social media phenomenon. They explore its impact on politics, corporations, and personal interactions, highlight...