MissPerceived

In this episode, Leah finally pulls back the curtain on a piece of her research she hasn’t fully shared yet: the mental load at work and how it travels both directions between your job and your home. Drawing on her book  Drained: How to Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More  and prior research with colleagues at the University of Melbourne, she explains why the mental...

Right before launching her book  Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More , Leah found a lump in her breast on vacation and was diagnosed with breast cancer. In this deeply personal episode, she shares what it feels like to carry the emotional thinking work of a serious health crisis on top of everyday life: worrying about your child’s future, your career, your dreams, and ever...

In this episode, Leah says the quiet part out loud: your parents (and older generations) are probably not the people who can help you solve your biggest life problems right now. Drawing on themes from  Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More , she unpacks why the world you’re managing—pandemics, political instability, climate anxiety, precarious work, AI, and always-on social...

Today, Professor Leah pulls back the curtain on a sneaky problem hiding inside your already overloaded brain: duplicated mental load. Drawing on her new book  Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More , she explains why mental load is emotional thinking work, how it stretches across eight types and seven stages, and why so much of it is being quietly double- (or triple-) handled...

If every conversation about housework, childcare, careers, and the mental load seems to end in frustration, resentment, or a full-blown fight, this episode is for you. Leah breaks down why these talks get stuck, how gender norms shape what each partner hears, and why leading with your dreams instead of your overwhelm can change the entire conversation. Drawing from her research and her upcoming bo...

Should kids be on social media? Or should we ban it entirely? In this episode of Misperceived , we tackle one of the most complicated parenting questions today: social media and children. Parents everywhere are struggling to figure out the right approach. Should kids have smartphones early so they can learn how to navigate the digital world? Should parents strictly monitor and limit access? Or sho...

In this episode of  Misperceived , Leah unpacks the “gray tsunami” and explains why the real future-of-work crisis isn’t just AI—it’s caregiving. She widens the lens on care beyond moms and little kids to include aging parents, partners, friends, disabled family members, and even our future selves, showing how this rising care demand is slamming into already maxed‑out mental loads and pushing...

In this episode of  Misperceived , Leah asks a deceptively simple question: Is it actually your fault—or did society make you do it? Drawing on her training as a sociologist and her book  Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More , she breaks down what sociology is (and how it’s different from psychology) and shows how invisible social norms quietly script our choices, beha...

In this episode of  Misperceived , Leah gets honest about her late-night doomscrolling habit and why “just checking your phone” leaves so many women wired, anxious, and exhausted the next day. Drawing from her research and her upcoming book  Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More , she explains how constant exposure to heavy news and social media pings our mental load to...

In this episode of Misperceived, Leah pulls back the curtain on a powerful mental load category from her forthcoming book, Drained: Reduce Your Mental Load to Do Less and Be More—dream building. She explains how women’s dreams get quietly starved as they carry invisible, boundaryless, and enduring thinking work for their families, workplaces, and communities, and why that’s a loss for everyone, no...

On this episode Prof Leah breaks down why Valentine’s Day can feel less like a celebration and more like a mental load marathon for moms, partners, and singles. She talks about the pressure to plan the “perfect” day, the emotional exhaustion of dating apps, and the hidden expectations women carry around romance, gifts, and feeling seen. You’ll hear practical reframes for taking the pressure down,...

On this episode, Leah explores how generational messages have taught women to feel shame about their changing bodies—from tight jeans and bodysuits in the 80s and 90s to today’s high-waisted shorts and leggings. She reflects on growing up hyperaware of every outline and curve, and how that discomfort still echoes when she sees her own daughter getting dressed. Through personal stories, a...

Everyone is sick right now—and somehow, you still feel bad for needing to lie down. In this episode of Misperceived, Leah unpacks why so many women feel guilty when they get sick, even when their families are fine, fed, and happily living on Hot Pockets and Uncrustables. Drawing on global stories from the U.S., Australia, and Sweden, she breaks down how culture, capitalism, and the lack of a...

January isn’t a fresh start if you’re already running on fumes from making everyone else’s holidays magical. In this episode of MissPerceived, Leah unpacks why so many women swing from December over-giving straight into “new year, new me” overachieving—launching businesses, overhauling their bodies, and rewriting their whole lives before February even hits.​ She breaks down the mental load ha...

Feeling like you have to declutter the entire house, redesign your space, and fix consumerism itself… all before the tree is even down? This episode breaks down the post-holiday “mental load hangover” and explains why the pressure to create and then undo all the holiday magic is not a personal failing, but part of the eight types of mental load described in Leah’s upcoming book,  Drained . Le...

Did women suddenly lose their ambition—or did the 2025 Lean In & McKinsey “Women in the Workplace” report give everyone the wrong story about what’s actually going on? In this episode, Professor Leah takes a blowtorch to the idea of a so‑called “ambition gap,” arguing that the real problem isn’t women’s drive, it’s burnout, mental load, and structural barriers at work and at home. Leah breaks...

Is the clutter in your home actually messing with your health—or are you just “too sensitive”? In this episode of Misperceived, Professor Leah Ruppaner breaks down the science on clutter, stress, and the mental load, including a landmark UCLA study showing that women who describe their homes as cluttered and unfinished have elevated cortisol patterns across the day, while men in the same home...

In this episode of MissPerceived, Professor Leah unpacks what really happens when something goes wrong with your kids and the school, coach, or doctor has to pick up the phone: who do they call first, and why is it almost always mom? Drawing on new research from the Quarterly Journal of Economics and her own mental load interviews, Leah breaks down how schools and other institutions default to mot...

Why do college besties hit different from every other friendship you’ve had since? In this episode of Misperceived, Prof Leah breaks down what makes university friendships so intense and enduring, weaving in research on brain development, “self‑authorship,” and how women use friendships to test ideas, build identity, and stay sane in a hostile world. She explains why that 3 a.m. pizza‑and‑life‑cha...

When does keeping your kids safe turn into quietly wrecking their chances to grow up? In this episode, Prof Leah unpacks teen dating—covenants, text surveillance, and all—and asks what happens when parents’ fear of the future swallows their kids’ present. Drawing on her research on the mental load (and her forthcoming book  Drained ), she connects helicopter parenting, constant digital survei...

Ever feel like your day is just one “Are you kidding me?” moment after another? This week, Prof. Leah breaks down why some meetings should be illegal, how flat tires seem to know when you’re at your limit, and why venting to your best friend might actually be the healthiest thing you can do after a week of emotional overload . Drawing on new research from the Journal of Adolescent Health, we look...

On this episode of MissPerceived, Leah flips the script on the mental load, shifting focus from mothers to the evolving experience of dads. Drawing from new research and hundreds of interviews across the US and Australia, Leah unpacks how modern fathers are navigating emotional thinking work-what she calls the “mental load logics”-while managing family, work, and parenting standards that have chan...

On this episode, Professor Leah dives into new research revealing why high-powered, high-earning mothers still can’t shake their mental load—no matter how much money, help, or flexibility they gain. Discover the difference between core and episodic mental load, why domestic cognitive labor sticks to women regardless of income or status, and how “gender stickiness” explains persistent burnout among...

We’re digging into the real deal behind that “return to work” moment after having a baby. Have you ever wondered if you’re supposed to feel overwhelmed, lost, or suddenly less “yourself” as a mother, or if it’s just you? Spoiler: it’s not just you, and it’s not a flaw. On this episode, Leah breaks down what brand new research tells us about why mothers feel double the time pressure (hint: it’s not...

Let’s get brutally honest about what really happens when you split up after 40. Professor Leah dives into the latest divorce research (with a little side-eye at bad advice and bad exes). Whether you’re thinking of leaving or just hanging on by a thread, you’ll get clear-eyed advice about dividing up homes and pensions, what happens when “the kids are grown,” and why being practical (and maybe a li...