Mapping New Common Ground

In this episode, Jed finishes the examples for Compelling Seeds, a technique for changing another’s mind in a single, short conversation. This time the focus is on the final step, Glue in You, where you tell a personal story from your past that grounds the feelings you have on the current issue. Along the way, Jed shares a simplified explanation for Compelling Seeds, to show how life may have alre...

In this episode, Jed gives examples with particular wording for Feed a Need, the first step in a Compelling Seeds conversation - the technique for changing someone’s mind in a single, short conversation. Each example addresses a particular need, either the need for belonging, being heard, being respected, or being needed. He does this for three different situations where you might want to change s...

In this episode, Jed fleshes out Compelling Seeds, a technique for changing someone’s mind in a single, short conversation. For the first step, Feed a Need, he suggests how to start the conversation with an estranged family member, a friend, and a stranger at a protest by the opposition. Then he gives examples of the types of basic human needs you can address as you open the conversation. For the...

In this episode, Jed shifts to the problem of changing someone’s mind who doesn’t want it to be changed - instead, they want to change your mind. This is the more typical situation we are in when across a political divide from someone. Jed introduces a technique called Compelling Seeds, which, unlike a debate, takes into consideration the emotional anchors that hold our opinion stories in place. I...

In this episode, Jed lays more groundwork for how to change the mind of someone who is across a political chasm from you. He adds a few more concepts, sticking to the simpler case from last time - changing the mind of someone who wants their mind to be changed. They are stuck on a story that isn’t serving them well, and they want to shift to a different story that does serve them well. He drills d...

In this episode, Jed uses some guided imagery to solidify the concept that strong feelings anchor stories, putting us under a sort of spell. Next, he tries to convince the listener that for real world scenarios of any complexity, the chances of any one person having all the facts straight are very small. Next, Jed pulls a concept from a future episode - that it doesn’t make sense to blame someone...

In this episode, Jed introduces the Separation Pressure Mindset, the fourth connection mindset that illuminates how a particular force that pushes on us from within can push us physically away from those we disagree with, despite our intentions. Then, Jed shows how the four forces described so far can together provide simple answers to many confounding questions: * Why is it so hard to live harmon...

In this end of summer check in, Jed speaks to where he’s been all these weeks, and a modified approach for the podcast going forward. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit storyforces.substack.com

In this episode, Jed revisits the urge we have to correct others: Correction Pressure.  He touches on how deeply engrained it can be and how it plays out in groups.  Then he introduces a technique called Connection by Curiosity that can be used to work around correction pressure to connect with those we disagree with.  With this technique, rather than having the difference of opinion serve as a cu...

* In this episode, Jed introduces a force called correction pressure - a force that powers the urge we have to correct those we disagree with. This force is central to why our world is so polarized, and tirelessly works against connection. He digs deep into what it means to hold a story , and the multiple reasons we so desperately defend the stories we hold. Finally, to these stories we hold and d...

In this episode, Jed reflects on a question that is relevant to every conversation ever had, a question that led him to envision three different connection mindsets. Then he touches on how the title of this episode points to a lifelong project we don’t realize we are all on. Next, there are some questions posed to help listeners better connect the concept of alignment bonding to their personal exp...

In this short episode, Jed introduces a new resource and revisits the questions: What problem does the Story Forces Project address? How do these connection mindsets address it? What gives hope that it might work? What are the obstacles to it working? He answers each, but this time using concepts from the first two connection mindsets. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this wi...

In this episode, Jed introduces the Alignment Bonding Mindset, a way of thinking about what goes on under the hood to pull people together when stories they hold align. He explores how the common ground provided by these stories we hold in common is central to belonging, helps us know we are not lost in the world, and gives reassurance that we know how to make the world a better place. These posit...

In this episode, Jed revisits the frame-surface-plan technique for preventing an increase in the emotional distance we feel with others. In Chapter 5, he introduced the technique using the example of sharing an apartment with someone. This time, he explores how the frame-surface-plan conversation needs to change if it happens after the lease is signed, after moving in, after problems come up, or a...

In this episode, Jed shares a simple visualization of how conflicts kick-in during collaborations. He delves deeper into the idea of changing the framing around a collaboration from "me vs them" to "both of us vs things that work to divide us”. Next, Jed describes a technique to reduce distancing pressure, using a sharing an apartment as to help illustrate. Finally, he revisits the challenging que...

In this episode, Jed gives a name to this first connection mindset - The Distancing Pressure Mindset. He introduces the idea of thinking of an emotion as powering a force. He coins the term distancing pressure for when anger pushes context out of stories, and this leads us to feel less connected to the people the stories are about. Then Jed looks into the question of who is responsible for this pr...

In the previous episode, Jed introduced the concept of backstory blindness, a temporary condition where strong emotions can push context out of stories. We become blind to “the story behind the story” when that context is lost. This is a feature of the human design that often serves us well, and sometimes doesn’t. In this episode, he explores five downstream effects of backstory blindness that can...

This episode is the first of perhaps three that will cover the first connection mindset. It won’t get a name until some groundwork has been laid. Here, Jed explains the central concept - what happens when our inner storyteller crafts a thought and emotions come along for the ride. Or, perhaps its emotions that come up, and bring our inner storyteller along for the ride. Judge for yourself whether...

In this episode, Jed explains the particular perspective that brought into focus a number of connection mindsets, each of which speaks to its own chunk of new common ground. He shares pivotal experiences that led him to that perspective - experiences that revealed how minds can be changed. He explains that once he started looking at human interactions from that perspective, everything he saw just...

In this introduction episode, Jed from the Story Forces Project gives an overview of what the Mapping New Common Ground podcast is all about: * looking at what divides us and what connects us, from a very different angle * exploring what goes on outside of our awareness that pushes us apart and holds us there and what pulls us together * taking first steps toward a future where thoughtful curiosit...