Love Inside Out with Adele Testa

Ten years ago, I packed up the life I'd taken 25 years to build and moved to a different country for one person. That person was — and is — worth it. But moving for love is not the romantic plot point it gets sold as. It's a slow, structural decision that touches everything: your friendships, your identity, your money, your sense of home, even the way you spend a Sunday evening. Nobody exp...

Why do you push away the people who are genuinely good for you — and feel strangely at home with the ones who aren't? If steady, kind love feels boring, suspicious, even suffocating… if a caring partner has ever made you think "this is too good to be true" … if you keep choosing chaos and calling it passion — this episode will hit close to home. In this episode of Love Inside Out, we...

We've all been sold that fixing our relationship takes a weekend retreat, a couples therapist, or a three-hour conversation at midnight that leaves both parties both wrung out and staring at the ceiling. It doesn't. In this episode, I'm giving you part one of my coaching framework — three small, ordinary acts, done together every day, in five minutes total. The kind of acts you used to...

Your partner's ex. The one you've never met but can't stop thinking about. That's the ghost in your relationship — and in this episode, we're talking about why someone who is no longer part of the story has more power over your peace of mind than the person sleeping next to you. Today we focus on retroactive jealousy . In this episode, I break down what retroactive jealousy actually is, why it tak...

This episode is for anyone who's ever left a coffee, a dinner, or a group chat feeling quietly worse about their relationship — without being able to say exactly why. For anyone who's compared their love life to a friend's highlight reel and come up short. For anyone who vents to the same person every time and wonders why nothing ever shifts. But here's what happened. This Sunday I accidentally ra...

You're not behind. You're scrolling and play a lose-lose game with endless comparisons. Nobody tells you this, so I will: the most damaging thing you can do in love is measure your real life against someone else's highlight reel. That knot in your stomach when a friend gets engaged. That restless ache when you see a couple on holiday and yours feels quieter. That voice saying you shoul...

This episode is for anyone who's ever felt stuck in the same argument, said something they didn't mean, or walked out of a conversation wondering how it went sideways so fast. No jargon. No "use I-statements." Just three things happening beneath the surface of your love life that most of us were never taught to notice. But here's what happened. Three coaching sessions in one week. Three completely...

You know that moment at a family gathering when someone asks about your love life, your choices or your body and your chest tightens? This episode is your preparation. Easter is close. You'll want this before you walk through that door. In this episode of Love Inside Out , I'm giving you the gated bridge — a way to protect your peace at family events without shutting anyone out, building walls, or...

Making a big decision about your love life when everything is falling apart is like grocery shopping when you're starving. You grab whatever's closest. You don't read the label. You just want the empty feeling to stop. That's not clarity — that's compensation. This episode might save you from the wrong call. Love Inside Out — out now.

Last Sunday, I spotted a poster on a classroom wall in a primary school. Five rules. Handwritten in coloured marker. For children aged six. And I stood there thinking — if adults of my generation learnt and applied these five rules in their romantic relationships, half the heartbreak out there simply would not exist. We teach children these things before they can tie their shoelaces. Then somewher...

You've never sat someone down and handed them a list of your assumptions and expectations for how to love you. But you have that list. And when someone breaks a rule they were never told about — it feels like betrayal. If this hit close home, DM @adele_thecoach Love Inside Out is back with an episode about the thing underneath most relationship frustration: the invisible contract. The unspoken...

Have you ever lost your temper with someone you love and barely recognised yourself afterwards? Not just frustrated — properly gone. The message you fired off with shaking hands. Or the silence you went into on purpose, because you knew it would cut deeper than anything you could say. This week I'm taking on anger and rage — that zero-to-hundred surge where the calm, reasonable version of you...

The argument is over. The voices have stopped. So why does the silence feel heavier than the shouting did? If your relationship feels weird after a fight — even when the argument is over — listen to this episode. That uncomfortable space — where you're in the same house, doing normal things, but both of you are tense and somehow still fighting in your head — is where most couples actually beco...

You replayed the conversation. You analysed the text. You stayed up at 2AM building an argument about something that hasn't happened yet. And now your stomach hurts. This episode unpacks why overthinking takes over in relationships and dating — and what's actually going on underneath it. We explore horror vacui (the brain's refusal to sit with uncertainty), the cognitive distortions that make you...

If you're single, chances are you've been hurt. You've lost trust — not just in love, but in yourself. You tolerated things you shouldn't have. You stayed too long. You ignored the signs. This episode is your reset. I share a framework she's developed through years of working with clients and my own dating experiences. No checklists. No "must-haves." Just a different...

You scroll past a photo of the Obamas and think: that. I want that. The look. The respect. The decades-deep love that still lights up a room. But here's what we skip past — the therapy sessions, the 2am conversations that resolved nothing, the mornings where someone woke up annoyed for no good reason. We admire the destination. We're far less interested in the journey. This episode unpacks...

Have you ever swallowed something that hurt you and immediately told yourself "it could be worse"? Have you ever talked yourself out of a need because "at least they don't do X"? That's not gratitude. That's self-abandonment with a positive spin. In this episode, we explore the blurry line between genuine appreciation and shrinking yourself to keep the peace. I brea...

Why do we perform in our most intimate relationships? This episode unpacks where the belief that love must be earned comes from—and how to finally step off the treadmill. In this episode, we explore The Performance Trap: that exhausting pattern of monitoring yourself, proving your worth, and secretly fearing that if you stop performing, you'll lose their love. You'll learn:→ The difference...

New year, new pressure to fix everything—including your relationship. But what if the real problem isn't the argument about who forgot to defrost the chicken? It's the pattern underneath. This episode gets practical. We talk about stress signatures, the myth of quality time, and why most relationship tension has nothing to do with your relationship. You'll get actual scripts to defuse arguments be...

You choose the other person, and a small part of you disappears. You choose yourself, and the guilt creeps in. Some nights, loving yourself and loving someone else feel like they're pulling you in opposite directions. And underneath it all, that quiet sentence you've been carrying for years — "you have to love yourself first before anyone else can love you" — has slowly stopped s...

When most of us think about love, we're not really thinking about what we need. We're thinking about society's script and timeline. So when I ask, "Are you where you want to be in love?"—I'm not asking whether you've ticked the right boxes. I'm asking something deeper. Do you feel fulfilled? Do you feel alive in your relationship—or, if you are single, do you feel in charge in your search for a pa...

Dreading those awkward questions at the dinner table? Whether you're bringing a partner home, navigating the holidays single, or stuck in situationship limbo—this episode is your survival guide. We explore:→ Why family gatherings trigger old patterns→ The loyalty bind when partner meets family→ How to handle the "still single?" comments→ Setting boundaries without guilt→ Breaking fre...

What if your beliefs about love are actually keeping you from having it? We all carry stories about what relationships should look like—from romantic movies, our parents' marriage, or that person who broke our heart years ago. These love narratives are not always true. This episode unpacks the most damaging relationship myths: that love should be effortless, that passion inevitably fades, that con...