Love Inside Out with Adele Testa

Are you single and wondering if love will ever find you? Or are you dating and unsure if this is the right person? This episode is for anyone navigating the messy, confusing world of relationships and choice. I explore three powerful ideas that can transform how you approach dating: Know yourself first by understanding your patterns and what you actually need (not just what sounds good on paper)....

It starts with a quiet Sunday evening. The sun is still up, everyone else seems to be out living their best summer, and suddenly you are downloading the dating app you swore you deleted for good. In this Summer Heart Note, we look at what that ache may really be: the wish to feel wanted, the need for someone to share a sunset with, the discomfort of arriving alone to another barbecue, or simply th...

Most of us think the fight is the damage, but the real damage usually happens after , in the silence nobody teaches us how to handle. This week's Sunday Heart Note was about the careful quiet that shows up on holiday. So I'm bringing back one of my favourite episodes on a different silence entirely: the one that lands right after a row. 🤎 In this extract of episode 11, we get into why you...

A holiday is basically a relationship stress test in a sunhat. Take away the work, the routine, the separate friends, the rooms you can escape to; and it's just the two of us, sharing a bathroom, a bed, and every single decision about where to go and what to eat. That's exactly where the friction I'd been quietly avoiding for months had nowhere left to hide. In this Heart Note: I get i...

Sunday's Heart Note left us with an idea: wedding-grief isn't a wound, it's a compass, pointing at something you still want . Today's replay picks up that needle and puts it on the table. This is the Episode 3 extract: are you where you want to be in love? We will try to explore the complex question: if nothing changed for a whole year, if twelve months from now your love life look...

You can be genuinely happy for the groom and bride, and still go home feeling sad. Those two things co-exist at the same time when you are in a challenging spot in your love life. In this Summer Heart Note, we explore the quiet feeling that sometimes follows weddings, engagement announcements, and other people's love stories. We try to understand what that mixed-emotion might be trying to tell you...

What if the argument is not really about the dishes, the bins or the unanswered text? Sometimes the relationship is not the problem. Life is. Work pressure, exhaustion, children, ageing parents, money, commuting and the mental load can quietly change how we speak, listen and react to each other. A small comment lands badly. One person withdraws. The other pushes harder. Suddenly, you are arguing a...

Have you ever noticed that a different version of you seems to appear a few days into a holiday? Your body softens. You laugh more easily. You become more curious, more spontaneous and more open to the person beside you. Then you come home—and that version of you seems to disappear almost immediately. In this first Summer Heart Note, we explore what might really be changing when we step away from...

Six sorries in two minutes — and the argument only got worse. If you've ever said "sorry" just to make the discomfort stop… if you've ever been handed an apology that left you feeling more unseen, not less… if you're quietly waiting for an "I'm sorry" that never seems to arrive — this one is for you. Most of us were never taught how to apologise. Very few of us ever received a real apology from a...

I once had someone fade on me so gradually that I didn't see it happening. He dressed the distance up as a busy season — a big project, a phase, nothing to worry about. By the time I understood what was going on, I'd already mentally planned our second anniversary. Fifteen years later I can still feel it: the confusion, the hollow space, the not knowing whether something had ended or whether I was...

Ten years ago, I packed up the life I'd taken 25 years to build and moved to a different country for one person. That person was — and is — worth it. But moving for love is not the romantic plot point it gets sold as. It's a slow, structural decision that touches everything: your friendships, your identity, your money, your sense of home, even the way you spend a Sunday evening. Nobody exp...

Why do you push away the people who are genuinely good for you — and feel strangely at home with the ones who aren't? If steady, kind love feels boring, suspicious, even suffocating… if a caring partner has ever made you think "this is too good to be true" … if you keep choosing chaos and calling it passion — this episode will hit close to home. In this episode of Love Inside Out, we...

We've all been sold that fixing our relationship takes a weekend retreat, a couples therapist, or a three-hour conversation at midnight that leaves both parties both wrung out and staring at the ceiling. It doesn't. In this episode, I'm giving you part one of my coaching framework — three small, ordinary acts, done together every day, in five minutes total. The kind of acts you used to...

Your partner's ex. The one you've never met but can't stop thinking about. That's the ghost in your relationship — and in this episode, we're talking about why someone who is no longer part of the story has more power over your peace of mind than the person sleeping next to you. Today we focus on retroactive jealousy . In this episode, I break down what retroactive jealousy actually is, why it tak...

This episode is for anyone who's ever left a coffee, a dinner, or a group chat feeling quietly worse about their relationship — without being able to say exactly why. For anyone who's compared their love life to a friend's highlight reel and come up short. For anyone who vents to the same person every time and wonders why nothing ever shifts. But here's what happened. This Sunday I accidentally ra...

You're not behind. You're scrolling and play a lose-lose game with endless comparisons. Nobody tells you this, so I will: the most damaging thing you can do in love is measure your real life against someone else's highlight reel. That knot in your stomach when a friend gets engaged. That restless ache when you see a couple on holiday and yours feels quieter. That voice saying you shoul...

This episode is for anyone who's ever felt stuck in the same argument, said something they didn't mean, or walked out of a conversation wondering how it went sideways so fast. No jargon. No "use I-statements." Just three things happening beneath the surface of your love life that most of us were never taught to notice. But here's what happened. Three coaching sessions in one week. Three completely...

You know that moment at a family gathering when someone asks about your love life, your choices or your body and your chest tightens? This episode is your preparation. Easter is close. You'll want this before you walk through that door. In this episode of Love Inside Out , I'm giving you the gated bridge — a way to protect your peace at family events without shutting anyone out, building walls, or...

Making a big decision about your love life when everything is falling apart is like grocery shopping when you're starving. You grab whatever's closest. You don't read the label. You just want the empty feeling to stop. That's not clarity — that's compensation. This episode might save you from the wrong call. Love Inside Out — out now.

Last Sunday, I spotted a poster on a classroom wall in a primary school. Five rules. Handwritten in coloured marker. For children aged six. And I stood there thinking — if adults of my generation learnt and applied these five rules in their romantic relationships, half the heartbreak out there simply would not exist. We teach children these things before they can tie their shoelaces. Then somewher...

You've never sat someone down and handed them a list of your assumptions and expectations for how to love you. But you have that list. And when someone breaks a rule they were never told about — it feels like betrayal. If this hit close home, DM @adele_thecoach Love Inside Out is back with an episode about the thing underneath most relationship frustration: the invisible contract. The unspoken...

Have you ever lost your temper with someone you love and barely recognised yourself afterwards? Not just frustrated — properly gone. The message you fired off with shaking hands. Or the silence you went into on purpose, because you knew it would cut deeper than anything you could say. This week I'm taking on anger and rage — that zero-to-hundred surge where the calm, reasonable version of you...

The argument is over. The voices have stopped. So why does the silence feel heavier than the shouting did? If your relationship feels weird after a fight — even when the argument is over — listen to this episode. That uncomfortable space — where you're in the same house, doing normal things, but both of you are tense and somehow still fighting in your head — is where most couples actually beco...

You replayed the conversation. You analysed the text. You stayed up at 2AM building an argument about something that hasn't happened yet. And now your stomach hurts. This episode unpacks why overthinking takes over in relationships and dating — and what's actually going on underneath it. We explore horror vacui (the brain's refusal to sit with uncertainty), the cognitive distortions that make you...

If you're single, chances are you've been hurt. You've lost trust — not just in love, but in yourself. You tolerated things you shouldn't have. You stayed too long. You ignored the signs. This episode is your reset. I share a framework she's developed through years of working with clients and my own dating experiences. No checklists. No "must-haves." Just a different...