Kiss Your Franchise Goodbye

We're starting our trio of alt-holiday films with the talking pig classic, Babe. Why Brooke chose this movie. 1990s Provo Mormon prohibitions on PG13 movies, so... Babe! We didn't expect the social commentary! CHRISTMAS MEANS CARNAGE! Mrs. Farmer Hoggett is underwritten and the kids are annoying! Are the mice annoying? Be nice to retail workers during the holidays, people! Speaking of bein...

There IS crying in baseball, especially for Rangers fans, and especially with this movie. It's Melissa's birthday movie! And Mark is back! The romanticism of minor league baseball. Welcome to Wrexham. And finally, our trio of alt holiday movies! Babe (1995) Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Spirited (2022) -- note: NOT Spirited Away, which we would love to do but is not a holiday movie and Miyazaki is j...

It's Scream 6 and the end (for now) of the Scream franchise. Brooke has 30 seconds to summarize all of her problems with this movie. We rank all of the films and Melissa updates us with her Smash or Pass of all the killers. For her birthday we're talking baseball and Bull Durham! Then a special surprise trilogy! Listen for what it is!

It's a re-quel, or whatever the kids are calling it these days. Why this movie totally rules, and fixes/elevates some of the problems from Scream 3 and 4. Jack Quaid. Toxic fandom. Nepo babies. And we end it with a game of "Smash or Pass" with all of our spooky season villains, including all the Scream murderers.

Like the scream franchise, we're back from a break and ready to talk this return! Isn't this like what Scream 3 was supposed to be? Why do people hate this movie? Who guessed the ending? Lack of progress on racial representation. 2010s and race in Hollywood. Melissa announces her birthday movie for after Scream 3-- and Go Rangers!

It's Scream 3, it's October, welcome to official spooky season! (Also, Go Rangers!) Wes Craven's use of rape, specifically children who are a product of rape being evil. Carrie Fisher! Andy can't remember Clive Barker's Lord of Illusions and starts everyone doing Adam Sandler impressions. Randy sighting! Stab-a-thon! Secret siblings? Dumb trope. Announcing our guided meditation...

It's Scream 2 and Andy, Brooke and Melissa are... talking baseball? Also sequels. And how this is the most stacked supporting cast in the history of sequels... except maybe Sharknado 2. Treatment of Black characters in this movie and franchise. Are there any sequels better than the original? Next week Scream 3-- go Rangers!

New series! Why this is the most Xennial movie ever. Intergenerational trauma and absent parents, absent adults. Kevin Williamson, Wes Craven, and more horrible tales of how awful the Weinstiens were. Drew Barrymore and that opening scene. The first "meta" film. Queer coding. Goddamn patriarchy. Rated NC-17 for "viscera." Box office and an insane slate of movies playing in its...

We say goodbye to Indy with a few tears but lots of analysis, and tangents about dating and patriarchy and legacy like you wouldn't believe! We also rank the Indy films and you won't believe how much we agree and disagree! Next up we're doing Scream! So pop your popcorn and let's talk about our favorite scary movies!

It's the Indy movie we've been putting off and here we are finally. The film's treatment of its Indigenous people. Indy getting older. What are the elements of an Indiana Jones movie? Shia LeBeouf! Andy's studio notes and Malinche. Next week is the Dial of Destiny which is the most Mark de Leon movie ever. Stay to the end for a "bonus scene."

Hi Barbie! An all-Barbie episode featuring Brooke, Melissa, Kitt, returning from her previous guest spots Kelly, and Brooke's Skipper-- Pru! Welcome Barbies! Barbie and the Rockers Ken! Opening and closing music from the 1997 Lillith Fair featuring Indigo Girls, Sarah Mclachlan, Jewel, and Meredith Brooks.

It's Kitt's birthday movie pick-- the 2013 Ben Stiller film The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Why Brooke hates Ben Stiller (but not in this movie). How we Mitty'd out of this movie several times. Major Tom/David Bowie. Danny Kaye and James Thurber. AMAZING stacked supporting cast. Andy's original review from Christmas 2013 where he gave this 3.5/5 stars . Hope you enjoyed! Next epis...

Special guest Christi joins us! How "Isolation Playhouse" script readings kept us sane during the pandemic. Everyone saw this in theaters! Some of us... in MALLS! We loved this movie! Because it's inoffensive? How this movie is about Spielberg's daddy issues. Upside/downside? Great movie about fathers and sons... and no female characters needed. A 20 minute debate about whether E...

Indy's back (and so are we!) and most of the crew is back together fresh off our Barbenheimer viewings. History with this movie. PG-13. The sexism and Willie. The racism. But also? This movie has some great stuff-- the mine cart, Short Round, and more. A tangent about Sound of Freedom and Operation Underground Railroad. Next time back with Last Crusade!

Don't look Marion! It's Raiders of the Lost Ark , and we have Joe from Tales from the Comic Shop with us. Indy/Star Wars merch nostalgia minute. Melissa is extra salty this week-- we talk briefly about the Texas Rangers. Is this a James Bond movie? Andy breaks out his weirdo George Lucas impression. The elephant in the room re Indy and Marion. George Lucas wanted her to be 11? Great, so he...

Watch along with us on YouTube with the Hard to Find Mormon Movies channel. And we're sorry. We also take a tiny break right before the "Line Upon Line" song and hit pause for a few minutes. But we tell you when we restart. Again, we're really really sorry.

It's Brooke's birthday so... we watched Saturday's Warrior ? We're sorry. You can hear our entire commentary track, too. But here's the short of it. This is terrible. Pam is all the tropes. The Population Bomb , eco-fascism, and white nationalism. The goddamn patriarchy and its part in this. But join us next time for a movie with slightly fewer Nazis-- Raiders of the Lost Ark !

It's Evil Dead Rise , which was just in theaters! Weirdly, we end up not talking about it that much, but instead go offf on long tangents about Scream, woodchippers, and then Brooke reveals her special birthday movie choice at the end. It's a doozy, and Andy would like to announce his retirement from the podcast as he has now gone to live in the woodchipper after this episode's studio...

Andy, Melissa and Brooke are OVER this one. How did they make the tree rape WORSE? Diablo Cody? The Final Girl trope. No clever sign off because we're just so done. Next time it's Evil Dead Rise, which is now available on VOD!

A quick Evil Dead Rise review! All about Joss Whedon (and Drew Goddard!) Separating art from artist, but... hoo boy. Fran Kranz as Whedon self-insert. MGM's financial troubles and the delays of the movie. Bad test screenings. Harry Knowles, Butt-Numb-a-Thon, and sex pests helping sex pests. Supermarket Sweep. Everything on the whiteboard. Archetypes. Sigourney Weaver is the GOAT. Not a troll--...

It's an Evil Dead -adjacent movie, Tucker and Dale vs Evil . The cabin looks like the cabin from Evil Dead! And the inside is like every other horror movie! And coupons for 2 for $3 chili dogs-- no limit! And all the teenagers are dying! Check out this handy list of all the deaths here ! This movie is glorious and how did it not make more money? Next week, a continuation of the "cabin in...

All right you primitive screwheads, listen up! It's time for Army of Darkness and boy are people mad! Army of Darkness: "You once found me funny." Andy and JB: "Honey, you got real misogynistic." What does hold up? Practical effects. Zany bits. Skeleton army. Rooting for the skeleton army! Through the power of time travel, Brooke appears! Budget troubles? Box office. Studio...

What... what IS this movie? Confusing beginning. Horror vs Horror Comedy. Which do we like better? Sam Raimi's use of women characters. Next week it's Army of Darkness! Groovy!

New season, new franchise! It's The Evil Dead, Sam Raimi's splatterfest cabin in the woods original! Why did Melissa want to do this franchise? What is everyone's experience with these movies? Content and Trigger warning: discussion of sexual assault and rape. The violence towards women in this movie. The production history of this movie. Raimi family connections! Xena! SeaQuest! Intro...

It's our 69th (nice) and final episode of Season 2! Oscar predictions and thoughts. Why Brooke didn't and JB did like Top Gun: Maverick.  JB's Top "a-Ha!" moments!  JB's best and worst movies -- one of which makes Andy's head explode Andy's Best Dogs JB's Best Sports Moment Brooke ranks the franchises Brooke's bests and worsts, including ranking all the birthday/special movies Andy ranke...