Journals of a Madman

Read Time: 3 minutes ForwardCalm and quiet. Seeking out God’s peace and joy in a time of need. JournalOctober 17th, 2017 Lord, I love you, let me cling to your joy and do your will. Cast out fear and anxiety and replace it with peace and prosperity. Help me love others to my fullest and preach the Gospel during this time. Thanks be to God for your forgivenessI want to take joy in my salvation. Psa...

Read Time: 4 min ForwardA dark time where my thoughts and feelings are very low. Its a prayer for healing and asking God to draw close during the beginning of my time in Vienna as a church fellow. JournalSeptember 4th 2017 Lord, my heart is broken in pieces and I can’t piece it back together. The love and joy I once had for loving and serving you and your people is gone. It feels like I have a sin...

Read Time: 4 Minutes Forward This is an entry that is quite unnerving. I stopped my ability to care about my brokenness. I had a hardened heart. I was asking God to fix my heart. Journal Drinking, porn, video games. Distracting from You. Shouldn’t be surprisedRight now I don’t doubt God or what Jesus did. I am in a place of sin for sure. But I don’t care. I don’t even feel bad about porn or drinki...

Reflection and ForwardThis journal entry is a little different. I was on a spring break trip senior year of college spending time with my small group leader. I wrote out this whole thought bubble about where I saw myself before leaving college. I was having a difficult time comparing myself to everyone else in college going on fancy trips for Spring Break and knowing exactly where they were headed...

Read Time: 5 minutes ForwardThis journal entry is the culmination of an old way of life that leads to consequences. JournalFebruary 22, 2017 Just drank a lot last night, woke up feeling crappy, sluggish and lazy. Unable to do work or even get up to feed myself. Playing video games and drinking is fun but God, that is not developing me into a man. I am not desiring you as my ultimate thirst quenche...

Read Time: 3 minutes Forward An exciting time for me while I reflected on the way that God worked within my friendship, using me. Journal February 20th, 2017 I just want to remind myself of how Good God is. My friend and I just had a great conversation about God working in our lives. My friend shared the impact I had on his faith in the parking lot and texted me after. Luke, be reminded of the gre...

Read Time: 4 mins ForwardThis journal comes from a man who has accepted not knowing his needs. In prayer he calls out to the Lord to refocus on Him. JournalDecember 14th, 2016 God, I don’t know what I need. Thank you for bringing me through experiences that I’ve been through. I pray for your spirit in me to work on my mind not to be distracted from You Lord. Things that are innocent and aren’t mea...

Read Time: 4 mins ForwardThis journal was written in my senior year of college. It must have been a recent stint of being very hard on myself. Lets listen in on what I journaled. JournalFall of 2016 I don’t trust myself enough to receive affirmation from myself. I look for everything that I did wrong before all the good things that I did. When I feel I’ve done something wrong, I beat myself up abo...

Read time: 4 minutes ForwardSenior Year of College. JournalGod, how do I disconnect myself from my performance morally, as a student, as a Christian, and as a small group leader. It disconnects me from others. How can I see other people as worth loving and spending time with? God I don’t know how to live, always trying to get a good grade on this moral test. Being a Christian shouldn’t be a barrie...

Read time: 4 minutes Forward This is the start of my senior year when I was the solo lead for my small group. Journal October 10th, 2016 Lord, today I was very anxious I’m so afraid of leading small group I’m afraid that its only me and I’m not believing your sovereignty I literally thought about small group unproductively for hours. It didn’t help and left me feeling like there were more question...

Read time: 3 minutes Psalms 28: 1-2 Lord, my Rock, I call out to you for help. Do not be deaf to me. If you are silent, I will be like those in the grave.2 Hear the sound of my prayer, when I cry out to you for help. I raise my hands toward your Most Holy Place. Forward Journal, Junior Year of college. Spring semester. Journal The closer I’m getting to God the more I see how unfit I am to be his s...

Read time: 4 mins Romans 6:21But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those things is death. ForwardThis is a short journal entry. Highly emotional with anger at myself. Perfectionism is a clear theme. This was mid semester, junior year of college. Journal11/1/2015 AngerI got really angry at myself when I make mistakes. When I’m bad,...

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness.” ForwardI find myself again in the throws of mental anguish the month before entering Junior year of college. Journal Entry August 4th, 2015 I’m not seeking you I’m drinking a lot. I’m watching porn. I’m talking about others; not in a good way. Cursing a lot. Lord, I know I can’t get mad at...

Thanks for reading Journals of a Madman! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work. Read Time: 4 minutes Romans 7:23But I see another law in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin which is in my members. (NASB) ForwardSummer struggles. Full swing of summer freedom and its consequences. JournalJuly 4th, 2015 Lord, I...

Thanks for reading Journals of a Madman! Subscribe for free! Read Time: 4 minutesPsalm 51:10Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. ForwardA deeply genuine confession to the Lord. Journal6/28/2015Dear Lord,This is bad. Again and again I’ve let the enemy take over my choices. I’ve given into my flesh and at the core of who I am I’m selfish, Lord. I’ve cut you off from...

Thanks for reading Journals of a Madman! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work. Read: 6 minutes Romans 6:14 For sin shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace. Forward I hope that this struggle is relatable and makes sense. Time an time again the battle surrounding lust and temptation is mental, the silent battle happens AFTER giving in...

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit parry6lb.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit parry6lb.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit parry6lb.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit parry6lb.substack.com