Intelligent Intoxication

When we practice “box breathing”, we: exhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 inhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 Each season of the year symbolically represents an/a exhale, empty pause, inhale, and full pause.  In the summer, we are abundantly full and intentionally allow, accept, and receive.  I invite you to consider these questions: What are you currently resisting? What might prevent you from allowing, accept...

When we practice “box breathing”, we: exhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 inhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 Each season of the year symbolically represents an/a exhale, empty pause, inhale, and full pause.  In the spring, we intentionally decide to start, begin, or bring in the new.  I invite you to consider these questions: Which new habits, routines, rituals, or systems are you willing to begin? What areas...

When we practice “box breathing”, we: exhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 inhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 Each season of the year symbolically represents an/a exhale, empty pause, inhale, and full pause.  In the winter, we intentionally decide to pause or take a break from something in order to create space.  I invite you to consider these questions: Which activities, commitments, relationships, or places d...

When we practice “box breathing”, we: exhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 inhale 4-3-2-1 pause 4-3-2-1 Each season of the year symbolically represents an exhale, empty pause, inhale, and full pause.  In the fall or autumn, we intentionally decide what to “exhale” or release from our lives.  I invite you to consider these questions: Which thoughts/beliefs are you ready to release? Which emotions are you r...

It is your responsibility to: clarify/identify what you want and need communicate those wants and needs to others when appropriate figure out how to get your wants/needs met ask others what they want/need decide if you’re willing or able to meet their expectations communicate to others whether or not you’re willing and capable of meeting their expectations I invite you to consider these questions:...

Our intention for being reliable is just as important as valuing reliability? I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice being reliable as part of a people-pleasing or approval-seeking habit? What are your intentions for appearing reliable to others? If someone referred to you as “unreliable”, what might you make that mean about you or them? I invite you to click on the link belo...

When we get triggered, it’s likely because someone else has said or done something and our nervous systems registers it as: too much too fast too soon You can’t control getting triggered, any more than you can prevent triggers 100% of the time. It’s not your fault that you get triggered, but it is always your responsibility to take care of your body when you’re triggered.  I invite you to consider...

“Frustration sometimes overlaps with anger. Both anger and frustration can result when a desired outcome is blocked. The main difference is that with frustration, we don’t think we can fix the situation, while with anger, we feel there is something we can do.” Brene Brown/Atlas of the Heart I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice feeling frustrated? What are you trying to cont...

“Feeling discouraged and resigned is about effort rather than outcome. With discouragement, we’re losing the motivation and confidence to continue with our efforts. With resignation, we’ve lost the motivation to keep trying.” Brene Brown/Atlas of the Heart I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice feeling discouraged? How do you take care of yourself when you are? When do you no...

When our life circumstances don’t unfold the way we want them to, it’s common for us to feel disappointed - especially when we believe that others are to blame for our disappointment.  Yet when we feel regret, it’s because we feel as if we made a past decision that we’re not proud of or that we’ve acted or failed to act in a manner that yielded the outcomes we really wanted.  I invite you to consi...

There have been many times in my own life when I was suffering from emotional pain secretly and resisted reaching out for help.  You don’t have to figure out how to feel better on your own or all by yourself. If you’ve been struggling, it might be time to reach out to me, or to a coach or counselor for assistance.    I invite you to click on the link below to book a complimentary happy hour call w...

When our life circumstances don’t unfold the way we want them to, it’s common for us to feel disappointed. In Atlas of the Heart, author Brene Brown explains disappointment: “Disappointed: It didn’t work out how I wanted, and I believe the outcome was outside of my control.” We also feel disappointed when others aren’t willing or able to meet our expectations. When this happens, make sure that you...

When our life circumstances don’t unfold the way we want them to, it’s common for us to feel disappointed, regretful, discouraged, resigned, or frustrated.  In Atlas of the Heart, author Brene Brown explains each emotion: “Disappointed: It didn’t work out how I wanted, and I believe the outcome was outside of my control.” “Regretful: It didn’t work out how I wanted, and the outcome was caused by m...

When you get frustrated with the progress you’re making, instead of putting your focus on the finish line, decide in advance how often you’ll “show up” to work and keep showing up until you get there.  I invite you to consider these questions: How willing are you to “keep showing up” until you get there? What might prevent you from showing up consistently? If you have something you’d really love t...

When we “quit”, we unintentionally stop doing something in spite of NOT liking our reasons. If you stop or decide not to finish something AND you like your reasons, you aren’t quitting - you course-correcting, pivoting, or pausing.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice “quitting” when you get frustrated even when you don’t like your reasons? How willing are you to pause or...

When our children finally leave home, the best gift we can give them is the comfort of knowing we, too, are moving on with our next chapters by intentionally create meaningful, fulfilling lives.  I invite you to consider these questions: How willing are you to intentionally create a new chapter in your own life? What might prevent you from doing so? If you have something you’d really love to hear...

When you notice feeling stressed or overwhelmed about everything on your “to-do list”, try this: Make a list of everything you believe must be done.  Then, place each task under one of four categories: HAVE TO DO/DON’T WANT TO DO: If you can’t delegate these tasks, tackle these items when you’re most focused and rested.  HAVE TO DO/WANT TO DO: You can do these things any time because you’re motiva...

We will all experience “triggering” moments. Sometimes, we’re reacting to something that happened to us in the past now in the present moment.  When you’re triggered, ask yourself: What age of you is triggered right now? I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice reacting in the present moment because of something that happened in the past? How willing are you to have your own ba...

We all have dramatic thoughts regarding things happening TO us. You can’t control having these thoughts the first time, but you can control whether or not you keep thinking them or whether you react to them and speak or act dramatically.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice fixating on dramatic thoughts? What do you notice reacting to your thoughts by saying or doing somet...

Your brain is motivated to: seek pleasure avoid pain do what’s easy You won’t have the motivation to do anything that is devoid of pleasure, painful, or difficult.  I invite you to consider these questions: What if you don’t have to be motivated, just decisive? What might prevent you from starting or stopping something you’ve decided to do?   If you have something you’d really love to hear on the...

You won’t be able to make sustainable shifts and progress if you aren’t willing to identify and manage the Inner Critic chatter in your head.  The Inner Critic will chatter any time you feel unsafe because something is uncertain, unpredictable, or uncontrollable.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice your Inner Critic chatter? How willing are you to manage the chatter?   If...

You may be in the habit of taking on the emotions of others if you feel emotionally saturated after spending time with them. Get in the habit of asking yourself: “Is this mine?” I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice taking on the emotions of other people? How do you take care of yourself when you’re saturated? How willing are you to adjust the amount of time you spend with c...

There’s a huge difference between offering someone sympathy versus offering someone empathy. When we feel sympathy, we pity another person and feel sorry for them. When we feel empathy, we try to imagine what it’s like to be in their shoes and offer compassion to them.  I invite you to consider these questions: When do you notice pitying other people? How willing are you to offer compassion, rathe...

There are many things I wish I had known when I was 25 that I do know as a 55-year-old woman.  It’s appropriate to feel guilty when our actions and words don’t match our values. When our outsides don’t match our insides, we are temporarily out of integrity. But when we’re IN integrity but not willing or able to meet the expectations of others, we will feel uncomfortable knowing that someone is dis...

There are many things I wish I had known when I was 25 that I do know as a 55-year-old woman.  I wish I would have known that it’s more important to subtract things, rather than add things, when we’re trying to improve our lives. Start by telling yourself the truth about what you do and don’t want, and then be willing to let go of anything you don’t want because it doesn’t align with who you reall...