Husband Material

Have you ever been disappointed by traditional counseling or talk therapy? In this episode, you'll discover the power of a whole-brain approach to outgrowing porn. You'll learn the why, what, and how of experiential healing work. This episode is required viewing for my clients. Related episodes: How To Heal Your Inner Child Experience Healing Through IFS Experience Healing Through The Im...

How do you pursue restoration after a relapse, especially in marriage or ministry leadership? Rocky Pisor tells his own story of processing a porn relapse after 17 years of sobriety. You'll learn how to notice the warning signs of impending relapse, and how to respond to relapse with curiosity and compassion rather than punishing yourself or pretending like everything is fine. There is wisdom...

"There is nothing inherently wrong with an aroused man." What is arousal? Why is it good? Sam Jolman helps us reclaim the heart of masculine sexuality for the purpose of awe, play, and worshipping God. You'll learn how arousal always has a script, why evil hates arousal, and the difference between sexuality and sensuality. At the end, you'll receive a beautiful blessing from Sa...

Why do I struggle with gay porn? What does freedom look like? How can I stop using gay porn? In this episode, I answer these questions based on years of research and helping hundreds of men achieve lasting freedom from gay porn. Recommended resources (including paid links): Healing And Recovery: Perspective For Young Men With Sexualized Attachments by Floyd Godfrey Man Cards: Conversation Starters...

What's the point of processing childhood experiences? In this special episode recorded live at the Sexual Integrity Leadership Summit, Drew, Doug, Eddie, and Matt share insights and stories about how processing childhood experiences can help you outgrow porn. Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, where he h...

Why do we sexualize emotions, and how can we desexualize them? In this episode, I explain what it looks like to "right-size" sexual energy through processing emotions and releasing trauma. Free tools to process emotions: Feelings And Needs Wheel Feelings And Needs Inventory Ready to release some trauma? Come to the Husband Material Retreat in Colorado on September 6-10, 2024. Sign up at...

What happens when you feel entitled to sex and treat your wife like a replacement for porn? In this episode, Noah Filipiak tells his story of overcoming sexual entitlement and objectification. Along the way, he unpacks the false promises of purity culture, what love really looks like, how God's grace changes us, and the power of gratitude. Noah Filipiak is a pastor, author, and the host of Th...

What is the definition of sexless marriage? Why do couples experience this? Sexless marriage is often a symptom of deeper psychosomatic issues. Adam and Karissa teach practical tools to build a sexful marriage through vulnerability, intimacy, and safe touch. This episode can also help couples for whom intercourse is painful or not possible. Adam and Karissa King are a licensed coach/therapist team...

How do you respond to someone else's story with curiosity and compassion? In part 4 of this 4 part series, Marcus Spaur shares his story: "If I Only Could Have Been..." If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the f...

How do you write a story about your trauma and sexual experiences? In part 3 of this 4-part series, Wendell Moss shares his story: "Sex & Sexuality" If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Mat...

Why is story work absolutely essential for men outgrowing porn? In part 2 of this 4 part series, Chris Inman shares his story: "The Lonely Walk." If you love story work, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Material,...

What is story work? Where did it come from? What does it look like? In part 1 of this 4-part series, Drew shares his story: "The Day I Got Braces." If you love this series, you'd love Husband Material Groups. Apply to join a group at husbandmaterial.com/group Drew Boa (MA, PSAP) is a Certified Unwanted Guide and Inner Child Recovery Specialist. Drew is the founder of Husband Materia...

What is inner healing prayer, and how can it help men outgrow porn? This episode is a preview of our new online course, "10 Ways To Heal Your Trauma: Resolving The Roots Of Porn And Sex Addiction." Get free access at healyourtrauma.com Resources for Inner Healing Prayer: Streams of Healing: Finding Your Way to Wholeness with Key Leaders in the Inner Healing Movement , by Cathy Little and...

What is Polyvagal Theory? How can it help men outgrow porn? John Kilmer skillfully describes the autonomic nervous system and how to (re)shape it in order to experience regulation without unwanted sexual behavior. John Kilmer is a Mental Health Life Coach, Occupational Therapist, and Certified Husband Material Coach. John has completed the Foundations of Polyvagal Informed Practice Clinical Traini...

We need a theology of trauma. In this episode, Matt Wenger powerfully invites us to view our trauma through the lens of Jesus's life, death, and resurrection. This episode is a preview of our new online course at healyourtrauma.com Matt Wenger is the clinical director of Boulder Recovery , a 14-day intensive for Christian men struggling with sex, porn, and relationship issues. Boulder Recover...

Do you long for connection, but it feels impossible? In this episode, you'll learn extremely simple tools and techniques to create connection in any conversation—using your eyes, face, voice, and words. Helpful phrases: Tell me more… What’s it like for you... How does that affect you? That makes sense (because)... It sounds like / I hear you saying… It seems like something shifted… That stood...

There are over 40 reasons why men don't talk about their sexual abuse. Let's break the silence. In this episode hosted by Mike Chapman and Doug Carpenter, survivors of sexual abuse share vulnerable stories of harm and healing. Mike Chapman is a Certified Husband Material Coach and the leader of the HM fellowship for survivors of sexual abuse. Contact Mike at polarlifeconsulting.com/conta...

What is full disclosure? When, why, and how should I reveal sexual secrets to my wife? In this episode, disclosure experts Dan Drake and Janice Caudill walk us through the process of full therapeutic disclosure from beginning to end. You'll learn how to restore truth in your relationship in a way that is healing rather than harmful. Dan Drake and Dr. Janice Caudill co-founded Kintsugi Recover...

Your imagination is not bad. Learn the 4 main types of fantasies, how to evaluate the healthiness of a fantasy, and what to do with your healthy/unhealthy fantasies! Related episodes: Sexual Arousal vs. Sexual Desire How To Interpret Sexual Fantasies How To Analyze A Sexual Fantasy Introduction To Sexual Symbolism How My Sexual Fetish Shifted Over Time You're invited to HMA In A Day on Saturd...

What is grace, and how does it apply to sexual recovery? Jonathan Daugherty inspiringly explains how grace is not "soft" but the most powerful force for transformation and freedom from porn. Pride, shame, and comparison all melt away under the core truth that you are worth the life of God's son, and that can never change. Jonathan Daugherty is the founder and president of Be Broken...

If you're single and you experience same-sex attraction, this episode is for you. Dr. Greg Coles offers insight, humor, delight, and hope that defies typical Christian categories of what a "good and beautiful life" can look like. Greg Coles is an author, speaker, and scholar at the Center for Faith, Sexuality, and Gender. Check out Greg's books (these are paid links): Single, G...

What is the difference between outgrowing porn and purity culture? In this replay from The Porn Free Man Conference, you'll experience dramatic examples of what these two approaches look like, sound like, and feel like when you are... Reaching out to a friend after watching porn (failure vs. feedback) Sharing vulnerable parts of your story (harsh and critical vs. gentle and kind) Checking in...

How can parts work help us outgrow porn? Dr. Gerry Crete combines Christian faith, internal family systems, attachment theory, and EMDR into a powerful approach to outgrowing porn. Learn why we need to work with parts pre-emptively, how to "break the spell" when you're in a trance state, and practical ways Jesus can meet our attachment needs. Dr. Gerry Crete is a marriage and family...

How can a husband help his wife during a trigger? Tammy Gustafson reveals what triggers are, how they affect your wife's brain, and what she needs after a trigger tornado has passed. Discover how her triggers can become opportunities for healing! Tammy Gustafson is a trauma-informed Licensed Professional Counselor, coach, EMDR certified clinician, and speaker with 15 years of experience. She...

What happens when you combine storywork, artwork, and Jesus? Witness powerful healing in this live demonstration of HMA Coaching! As Drew shares a story of difficulty, chalk artisan Philip Leach creates a visual representation while coach John Kilmer offers attunement. Then we invite Jesus into the story and watch the chalk art change. The result is jaw-droppingly beautiful and incredibly meaningf...