Book of Boredom

** #134 Alma 16: Zoram And His Two Sons ** :: We improve Joseph Smith's unfunny sitcom :: Patience welcomes guest host Adrian back again! They discuss: Queensland's crazy creationists, the intersection of Australian politics and religion, Scripture Union and religious instruction in state schools. Finally, they read Alma 16 and try to follow the terrible storytelling. Recorded 24th May 2026. #Reas...

** #133 Roasting Saints 29: The Mormon Memory Hole ** :: May I have a propaganda filter for my QR code scanner? :: Jones and Patience discuss Mormon news, the April 2026 General Conference, and respond to some "history" that the 29th episode of the LDS "Saints" podcast dragged in. :: QUOTE: :: When discussing the hypocrisy of Joseph Smith for calling his own adultery sacred, while the womanising o...

** #132 Alma 14-15: Powercord ** :: A slapstick comedy with an unfunny side of burnt wives. :: Patience and guest host Adrian discuss Australian politics, and read Alma 14-15. Recorded 21st March 2026. :: Discussions: :: Gigi's progress watching the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. It's so boring, she's not getting very far. New hate-speech law in Queensland that doesn't seem well thought out. How gu...

** #131 Roasting Saints 28: Don't worry, it's not for time. ** :: At least for now! :: Divchina, Gigi and Patience listen and respond to some bonkers clips from the 28th episode of the LDS history podcast titled "Saints". :: Highlights: :: Learn how the "Relief Society" started, and how Joseph Smith twisted it his way. Discover how the Mormon secret-sacred-bullshit temple rituals started. Then mar...

** #130 Alma 12-13: Rock-Hard Hearts ** :: The Musical! :: :: LDS News Since Last Recording: :: False Prophet Russell Nelson died 27 Sep 2025. So feel free to spend less time in your local temple. Sadly, 4 humans were murdered in an attack on a Michigan ward building on 28 Sep 2025. LDS General Conference was on 3-5 Oct 2025. Fortunately, 0 humans died when a Sydney ward building caught fire on 6...

** #129 Roasting Saints 27 ** :: People Ruin Everything :: Jones and Patience rip apart some "faith affirming stories" from episode 27 of the Saints podcast. :: Highlights: :: Orson Hyde pretends to be a Jewish patriarch and piles up some rocks in the Holy Land. Ben Godfrey gets over excited about the "amazing work" of Leslie Sherman and her team, as they sift through "hundreds" of sources. He ask...

** #128 Alma 11: Deconversion Brainworm ** :: I'll see your SHUM and raise you an ONTI :: Gigi and Patience read Alma 11 from The Book of Mormon. It was pretty fun. The whole chapter is just so stupid. Smitty invents nomenclature for values of gold and silver and it all means nothing because we don't know how much a "measure of grain" is. It seems the only reason for this weak attempt at world-bui...

** #127 Alma 10: Morgy ** :: You gotta have food at the Morgy :: Alma 10 prompts Gigi to ask AI what a Mormon orgy would look like. Benjamin confirms that you definitely need food at an orgy. And Patience has her mind blown when she learns that shredded carrot can be put in jello to make a salad. Smitty gives lawyers a hard time in this chapter, so we have 2 lawyers-in-recovery to serve it back to...

** #126 Roasting Saints 26: Magic Finger ** :: History Obfuscating Verb :: Patience and Jones tear the "Saints" podcast a new one. Mouse adorably gatecrashes the conversation. Jones achieves peak rant. And everyone has a pretty good time! #Reasons to stay home this Sunday# - https://bookofboredom.com/reasons/ #Join the Blasphemy# - https://facebook.com/groups/BookOfBoredom #Patreon (Bonus Episodes...

** #125 Alma 9: Face Off! ** :: The boring BUDDY-COP sermon without the BUDDY :: In this episode, Gigi and Patience dive into Christmas propaganda, and the eternal struggle of being a Lamanite in a Nephite world (or vice-versa because in a refreshing twist, Alma doesn't seem to see much of a difference in this chapter). Patience gets a job, then is fired for calling out someone's religious hypocri...

** #124 Alma 8: Amulek breaks Alma's fast (and his back) ** :: Y'all get sleeveless garments for Xmas! So sell your sleeved garments on Depop? :: People try to make maps of the stories from the Bible and the Book of Mormon. But there's a difference. Smitty doesn't use real place names. So don't bother trying to picture any of the travels in Alma 8. Even true believers draw half-hearted squiggles....

** #123 Roasting Saints 25: The One Shitey And Wrong ** :: It's not the size of the steeple that counts :: Brother Brandon is back to explain Church History, Property Lines, Dallin Oakes, Death Canes, Joseph's prophecy about "The One Mighty And Strong", and the new LDS "trans guidelines" and how they may affect Mormons. Sister Divchina tells how The Church is in the process of excommunicating Nemo...

** #122 Roasting Saints 24: Old Steve Harper Had A Farm ** :: Oh no no no no! :: Today Brother Jones and Sister Patience mock episode 24 of the LDS "Saints" podcast, where Ben and Sarah are joined by church bigwig Steve Harper. A man with a smoothly deep and condescending voice, that could so easily be smoothly deep and sexy if he wasn't a Mormon. Steve talks so confidently about things that don't...

** #121 Alma 7: Bowels of Mercy ** :: Shitteth down from Heaven :: Brother Benjamin and Sister Patience discuss the latest Mormon related news, and then read Alma 7 where Joseph unmercifully shits "bowels of mercy" over every reader. Here are some "highlights" from this terribly poor chapter of the Book of Mormon. The only changes to the quotes are ALL CAPS and new-lines for emphasis. :: Alma 7:7...

** #120 Alma 6: Library Emergency ** :: Gideon Gideon Gideon :: Sister Gigi recounts a library emergency, and encourages Sister Patience to run for some kind of local office. They read Alma 6 and discuss recent Mormon related news. Verse 7 wins silliest verse from this chapter: " ... into the valley of Gideon, there having been a city built, which was called the city of Gideon, which was in the va...

** #119 Roasting Saints 23: Fresh Outta Spoons ** :: Religious Freedom is not Heathen Subjugation :: Brother Jones and Sister Patience dissect episode 23 of the LDS "Saints" podcast. An episode packed with nonsensical "faith affirming stories", that when given a minimum of contemplation become "faith removing stories that have no place in a history book". :: Also Irreverantly Discussed... :: The f...

** #118 Alma 4-5:30 A dingo ate my Book of Mormon ** :: and shat it into the Waters of Mormon :: Brother Benjamin and Sister Patience read 1.5 chapters from Joseph's Smith's tome of dingo shit AKA the Book of Mormon. They had a good time with it. Sister Patience sets the record straight. A dingo really did eat an infant in 1980. Australia's shitty legal system bungled the evidence, accused the par...

** #117 Roasting Saints 22: Mormon War Never Changes ** :: A mob of their own :: This episode is about the 1838 nastiness called "the Mormon war". We pull apart what the Saints podcast says about it, and also add a few extra tid-bits. It wasn't the first scuffle, and it won't be the last, as we make our way through early Mormon history. In a 24 hour period Joseph Smith's attitude goes from "fight...

** #116 Roasting Saints 21 and Alma 3 ** :: Waffle of Mormon :: As Joseph Smith loses his focus repeatedly in Alma 3, and the scribe rolls his eyes and continues to write - THINK CELESTIAL. When Joseph Smith introduces racist doctrine, and then incase anyone might explain it away continues to reiterate - THINK CELESTIAL. When Joseph Smith makes up a stupid new word like "Ishmaelitish", or goes inf...

** #115 Alma 2: Too Many Captains Spoil the Plane ** :: Happy MORMON Xmas on APRIL 6! :: This Chistmas episode, that includes our mockery of Alma chapter 2, was 3 months in the making. Sorry. But on the upside, it's just in time for a popular date in Mormonism for Christ's birth - April 6! We hear a wide variety of Christmas traditions, funny stories, and a few serious ones, based on the disparate...

** #114 Roasting Saints 20: Nibble Nobby's Nibley ** :: Before Smitty Nibbles Yours :: In episode 20 of the LDS Saints podcast, we are presented with the Kirtland Safety Society. A bank that Smitty false prophesied would become the biggest swinging dick around, and eat all competitor cocks (banks). Nothing went right with this venture, and many unfollowed him on X (formely known as Twitter). Yet,...

** #113 Alma One: Poke the Bear ** :: Neee-Hawww and Gideon have a preach battle :: Don't worry, Neee-Hawww AND Gideon die! :: Mormon related news discussed: :: Homelessness in Salt Lake City. How do you help people? Benjamin, Gigi and Patience each have different perspectives. James Huntsman's fraud case against the Church is being appealed (naturally). Brother Benjamin explains where the "Ninth...

** #112 Mosiah 29: Boredom Shared, Burden Halved ** :: Presented by Friends in Iniquity :: Sister Divchina joins Sister Patience in reading the final horrible chapter of Mosiah. They also discuss the poorly regulated "troubled teen industry" in Utah, which sadly stole the life of 17 year old Taylor Goodridge on 20th December 2022. ** "Things" learned from Mosiah 29 ** Joseph Smith loves non-specif...

** #111 Mosiah 28: Hyrum Smith's Sunglasses ** :: The people of the run-on-sentence of Limhi :: Brother Jones and Sister Patience try to read Mosiah 28 with a straight face (not possible), and also discuss recent Mormon related news. ** A Slightly Interperative Summary of Mosiah 28 ** The people of Zerahemla had "great anxiety" and were "desirous beyond measure" to know the history of a dead peopl...

** #110 Mosiah 27: Alma son of Alma ** :: Hilarity with Charity! :: In preparation for this recording, Sister Charity ruined her Youtube search history with Mormon research. Thank you for your sacrifice! She contrasts the latter-day-cult with her own experiences of growing up as the spawn of pentecostal missionaries in the Philippines! Since there were two lawyers on the show, Sister Patience aske...