A Thousand Tiny Steps

I had a UTI and I had no idea. It presented none of the usual symptoms that happen to younger people so when I went into the ER and found out I had one I was dumbfounded. This was a learning experience for me and I hope more older women can hear this and get the help they need as well.    Key Takeaways:    [1:11] I didn't know I had a UTI, I had atypical symptoms at least to me  [7:21] Going to th...

I binged watched Six Feet Under, a show based on a real life family who owned a funeral home and how they went through grief. It was such a moving show that covered divorced, being gay, marriage, birth, and death that I felt a full spectrum of emotions. This comes at a time when I am creating some big events for the MollyB Foundation.    Key Takeaways:    [1:51] No one will ever miss Molly as much...

This episode is all about cherophobia and how whenever things start to feel good, I feel like I want to flee. It is about an aversion to joy often because of trauma and how when things start to go well, I often can bring stressful people into my life.    Key Takeaways:    [2:05] Cherophobia is a fear of joy and here are the causes of it  [4:20] I didn't want to let my guard down because then bad t...

I recently discovered my old running logs and it was a treasure trove of information on how my life used to be between exercise, old boyfriends, and what my life was like before Molly died. So much of life has changed, and yet, it's like nothing has changed at all. In this episode, I explore my journals and the power of music.    Key Takeaways:    [1:41] Having a deep attachment to things especial...

In this episode, I explore how and why different religions fast and what it says about society. It was fascinating to learn and all of the religions hold common themes. I also debate if fasting is healthy or not. It leaves me with one question: what does fasting mean to you?    Key Takeaways:    [0:57] Fasting as a Baha'i  [3:37] Jewish people fast for purification  [5:13] In Buddhism people fast...

My morning routine will never be full of meditation and yoga. Instead it is currently filled with decluttering my household one bin at a time. This is in an effort to be more of a minimalist and carefully consider why I own the things I do. In this episode, I explore the grief attached to certain items and how I'm working on it.    Key Takeaways:    [0:50] My morning routine does not consist of me...

I listened to the story of Debbie, a woman who was sexually abused in childhood and I truly resonate with. From the way we were both told to be quiet about our abuse, our journeys of healing, and our coping mechanisms. In this episode, I look at common things things that go through the minds of children who suffer from sexual abuse.    Key Takeaways:    [3:19] Debbie works with a non-profit to hel...

Rosie came on with her partner Lauren to tell her story of getting POTS after having COVID and how it's affecting her life now. She's currently in the process of trying to get a service dog which will hopefully help give her more independence. In this episode, we chat about what it's like to have your partner be your caregiver and rethinking your life plans.    Key Takeaways:    [2:35] Getting COV...

When I talk to my friends about aging we're all in this spot where we feel somewhat unfulfilled by life, like somethings missing. It makes me wonder what's wrong and where in my life I need to improve. In this episode, I look at where I am in Erickson's stages of development and how I don't always fit into my age group because I'm an older mom.    Key Takeaways:    [1:59] I've lost my social life ...

As January ends, I realize I need to reevaluate when I make goals and what a routine looks like for me. I also take time off coaching, slow down, and try to enjoy the moment which is difficult for me. But through it all I am working on creating the life I want.   Key Takeaways:    [1:17] New Year's goals don't work for me and letting go of 75 Hard  [4:15] Taking time off from coaching  [5:58] Why...

Thrifting clothes is such an important way to be both sustainable and give back to the community. I talked to students and teachers at my local high school to discuss their on site thrift shop, the change it's making in their community, and the conversations around social impact it brings about.    Key Takeaways:    [1:29] Concord's sustainable thrift shop and how it came to be  [8:16] Using thrif...

I feel a lot of anger in my life and I'm diving deep to see what I'm holding on to. Along the way I discover my healing crisis and how anger fits into the 5 stages of grief. In this episode, I'll find strategies to deal with my anger and what I need to focus on in the new year.    Key Takeaways:    [1:58] Starting the new year angry   [5:00] Chronic anger is more resentment  [6:32] Why I'm angry a...

As we do the kitchen renovation, we've found layers upon layers of wallpaper and flooring. This is much like the multitude of layers of my person. I keep saying I'm going to change things and instead I rush around. So now I'm finding new ways to cope and be a better parent for Jack and Gracie.    Key Takeaways:    [1:00] The walls of my house hold stories  [2:28] The layers of flooring throughout...

While doing our home renovation we discovered a whole treasure trove of things in the walls. One of those things was a book on humane education by an amazing woman, Irene Hart who changed the history of education for New Hampshire and helped to advance women's rights.    Key Takeaways:    [1:02] I'm still making edits to my book  [5:14] The things in the walls of out house and the amazing Irene Ha...

I recently watched a documentary on living to 100 and what special things people did in certain communities to allow them to live that long. Some of it was not surprising and other parts were. There was so much information that I took from this documentary and I made a plan to make improvements to my own life.    Key Takeaways:    [1:46] The premise of the documentary  [4:31] Looking at four thing...

The holidays are upon us again and as always it's a rollercoaster. The MollyB basket went differently this year than it had previously and that was an adjustment for us all. On top of that, I've had to navigate how to spend Christmas with Jack growing older.    Key Takeaways:    [1:16] Losing your child is different than losing someone older [6:42] Molly loved the holidays when they danced in the...

My business coach introduced me to double binds and it makes so much sense. I've created them, but a lot of other people in my life have too and it has wreaked havoc. I can now look back on past relationships and why it wasn't working. In this episode, I explore the psychological aspects and my own experience.   Key Takeaways:    [0:42] What a double bind is, the one I created, and some examples ...

Leda Peterson is a wonderful CrossFit athlete helping women over 50 get into CrossFit. She knew she had to change her life and get in shape, but she was nervous about starting CrossFit at an older age. In this episode, we discuss how she overcame that and her experience growing up as an immigrant with a single mom.    Key Takeaways:    [1:56] Leda's immigrant experience from El Salvador  [4:51] Mo...

I'm tired of people telling women to be quiet. In today's age, so many minority groups pit themselves against another minority group and I sometimes don't understand whose benefit that is. This is part of why I wrote Motherland. I was tired of being told to silence myself.    Key Takeaways:    [1:22] My interview on running with Brooke  [2:14] Why people run in correlation with mental health  [5:3...

In the 70s when my best friend died, I didn't know because it wasn't talked about. This had a lifelong impact on me full of grief and reflection. This is why when Molly died I decided to let all her friends know what was happening and allow anyone who wanted to come and visit. Being open about the process was a way to heal a wound of the past.   Key Takeaways:    [1:55] My childhood best friend di...

It seems like everyone around me is dying as I grow older. It's a lot to process and has led me on a journey of looking into the 5 stages of grief and finding a 6th stage too. I think about the stage that I'm in versus others around me and how that affects our interactions with one another.    Key Takeaways:    [1:21] My friend Rusty died from cancer and his wife died too  [3:15] Knowing someone's...

The kitchen updates continue to terrify and excite me as I remember all the times that we spent as a family in the kitchen where Molly sat. I also had my book launch and so many people I wasn't expecting came out to support me.    Key Takeaways:    [1:16] Updating the kitchen and letting go  [5:43] New landscaping changes  [7:14] Landscaping coaches house too  [8:03] My memories in the kitchen wit...

I've been thinking lately about the people I surround myself with, what that means, and the wonderful support I receive. It's interesting to look back and see the toxic people I spent time with and how much my life has changed since then.    Key Takeaways:    [1:36] Susan is someone who brings me so much joy [4:13] Roberta learns so much about me through my podcast  [7:04] Deb has been my friend s...

We recently had to chop down a tree that has been on our property for years. It brings me great sorrow because change is difficult for me. I have so many memories of Gracie and Molly playing under the tree and now that it's gone it's like a piece of Molly is gone as well. But with these changes, I begin anew.    Key Takeaways:    [0:46] I didn't like The Giving Tree when I read it  [1:37] How we b...

Virginia uses societal issues and turns them into beautiful stories. For the past few years she has helped me write my own story, Motherland which you can pre-order online. We spent hundreds of hours exchanging voice messages and crafting the story of Molly.    Key Takeaways:    [0:46] Virginia helped me write my book, Motherland  [2:10] How Virginia got into writing books full time  [5:05] How Vi...