Unfolding with Kathy Varol

Meditating this morning, an analogy between scars on our physical body and scars on our energetic and relationships bodies surfaced. I’d love to share it with you. 

For everything in life, there’s a tipping point where more is worse instead of better. Empathy is no different. Identifying too strongly as an empath can have its pitfalls. When empathy becomes central to your identity, you may start to over-empathize. This creates a risk of neglecting your own lived experience. This can make setting personal boundaries challenging.

Not healing ourselves doesn’t just hurt our own ability to fully engage in the world, but it hurts those closest to us too. Our armor cages out and contracts our partners as well. One of the most important things we can do for our loved ones is take time to heal ourselves. 

In the past, I was compromising with the partners I chose, because I thought I was a compromise. And I thought over-compromising - if the “pros” in my list were more than the “pros” in their list - would keep my heart safe. But it doesn’t work that way. 

I recently heard a definition of grounding that resonated deeply. I hadn’t heard it explained this way before. In this episode, I’ll share that definition with you, and offer a new visualization to try in your grounding practice. 

Each of us has a gravitational force. When you allow yourself to sink into the depths of your being, and call all of your energy back into you, you become a force that is felt deeply. Not only by yourself - allowing yourself to be cocooned in your gravity - but also by everyone who encounters you. But when you allow your energy to be pulled into a million directions - toward all the shoulds and ex...

I recently went to a wake held for the passing of a friend's dog. It got me wondering why wakes for pets aren’t a common thing. Pet’s become true family members, and yet their loss is usually marked in relative isolation. Grief is a hard, heavy, and ferrell emotion. Community is a key part of being supported through the grief journey. 

Dystopian story energy (Aliens, mad max, horror), is the same frequency as the doom and gloom addiction to the future and current state of our world. Many people fall into an addictive trap, feeling compelled to know about all the suffering in the world and embody it. This addiction causes an unrooted overwhelm that’s driven by guilt, a sense of responsibility or duty to things you can’t control a...

It’s important to ask others before unloading on them if they have the capacity to hold you in this moment. This question acknowledges that as humans we don’t always have the capacity to support others. And it’s important to check in with yourself - if someone doesn’t check in with you first - to see if you have the capacity to show up for how someone is asking you to show up. When you are an emot...

Each of us holds the potential to be a magician. Consider how we influence those around us. Our energy shapes meetings, events, and interactions. Our actions trigger responses. The frequencies we operate on ripple out, leaving an imprint around us wherever we go. To harness this power, you must be intentional about the reactions you wish to ignite. 

Many times the way we contort ourselves to behave in an aim to prevent something, causes that thing to happen. Once you become aware of this counterintuitive truth, you start noticing this mind-boggling pattern everywhere. In this episode, I share an example of how I was bringing people who wanted to see me fail into my life. 

Welcome back to the Unfolding podcast! It’s been a bit of a break, and I’m so excited to share new perspectives with you, starting with this season's kick-off reminder about how uniquely extraordinary, delightful, and awe-inspiring you are. Anytime you need a reminder of how special your you-ness is, listen to this.

What an amazing season of Unfolding. 108 episodes delivered three times a week. This podcast has been a remarkable journey for me. I hope it’s been a delightful journey for you too. As we wrap up this season, I wanted to share my thoughts.

A thousand-mile journey sounds daunting, even impossible. At the start, when the path forward is filled with uncertainty, there is an equal measure of doubt. But the truth is, each of us will complete multiple thousand-mile journeys in our lives.  

I had always thought of my job as a privilege. And it was. I had an amazing job, at an amazing company, doing things other people dream about. And it was my dream job for a while....until it wasn't. Until one day the perceived safety net of my position and all that it provided transformed to feel like a suffocating straight jacket.   

My brother recently shared this analogy with me, and I can’t stop thinking about it.   

I always felt like other people knew something I didn't. That other people had "the answer". That there even was "an answer", and I was already behind. Turns out, to any meaningful question, there is no "right answer".  

Today’s episode is a guided meditation. Find a quiet spot, take a seat, and let’s look inward to find your expansiveness.

Today I want to share a recent perspective shift I had, that moved me from the fear something was a bad omen, into the realization that something was a blessing.  

The word "integrity" comes from the Latin word integer which means "whole" or "complete". Integer can also mean a non-fractional number, or a number that is whole and not fragmented. It means being true in every scenario. That there is one authentic version of you.  

Today we’ll dive into dreams, courage, and the journey of life.

Have you ever thought about how pervasive drinking culture is globally? Let’s talk about it and discuss the importance of set and setting (i.e. mindset and physical environment) as a foundation for building connection off. Is drinking culture the default foundation we want to keep?  

Each of us embarks on countless heroes' journeys throughout our lives. Through these journeys, we encounter trials and are specifically there to help us grow. It is through the journey that we learn, evolve, and gain skills and knowledge we can teach. A hero's journey isn’t complete until the hero returns home to share what they’ve learned. Ask yourself: What have you left (i.e. people, beliefs),...

Multiple emotions can have the same internal body feeling. The emotional pair that is discussed most are the feeling of nervousness and the feeling of excitement. For many people, these emotions express similar internal body feelings. I call emotions with similar body feelings sister emotions. When you have one sister emotion you identify as “good” and one you identify as “bad”, these sister emoti...

I spent a lifetime trying to win approval. From parents, siblings, friends, teachers, professors, colleagues, and bosses. It became such an ingrained habit, that somewhere along the way my awareness lost sight of who I was trying to win approval from. When you seek approval from someone else, you are telling yourself that your worth is dependent on their beliefs about you. It’s impossible to hold...