The Middle To Nowhere

In this episode, I share something tender I’ve been sitting with—the shame I sometimes feel around being sad. In this episode, I explore where that shame comes from, how it ties into the belief that I need to “have it all together,” and what happens when I begin to challenge that story. I also talk about the counterintuitive instinct to isolate when we’re depressed, and how that might actually be...

In this short episode, I open up about what feels like a spiritual drought—those seasons when my once-vivid sense of connection and expansion feels distant. Reading from a recent journal entry, I wrestle with the tendency to judge where I am now against past mountaintop moments and the longing to return to a state of clarity and divine encounters. Using the metaphor of trees and their seasonal cyc...

In this deeply reflective episode, I sit down with Hunt Priest, an Episcopal priest and founder of Ligare.org, to explore the transformative power of sacred plant medicines. Hunt shares his journey from traditional ministry to participating in a groundbreaking study on psilocybin at Johns Hopkins, where he experienced a profound spiritual awakening. Together, we dive into how these experiences res...

In this episode, Kelly reflects on nearly 20 years in the church that I grew up going to, sharing her journey through faith, doubt, and personal growth. She talks about the supportive community she found, but also the challenging moments, particularly around the toxic dynamics she encountered and the difficulty of confronting leadership when things went wrong. Kelly opens up about the struggles of...

In this episode of The Middle to Nowhere , I honor the memory of my dear friend Jesse Holcomb, who passed away earlier this year. On what would have been Jesse’s birthday, I reflect on my unique grieving process, the challenges of loving someone struggling with alcohol use disorder, and how my newfound spiritual life has helped me navigate that journey. I share the lessons I learned in loving Jess...

In this episode, we explore the savior complex and how it can be created in church culture. Building on our previous discussion about purity culture and unhealed shame, we dive into how the drive to constantly help others and prove our worth can follow us long after we leave the church. Join me as we unpack these patterns, how they show up in our daily lives, and how we can begin the journey towar...

In this episode, I dig further into many of the insights gleaned from my conversations with both Jonathon and Leah in the previous two episodes, further digging into the effects of growing up in evangelical purity culture and many of the ways it can still effect people, even after leaving the church or even their faith. Having dug into the concept of deconstruction and it opening a whole new door...

In this heartfelt episode, I sit down with my old childhood friend Leah Morales to explore her profound journey of leaving the church we both grew up in. Together, we delve into the emotional and often painful process she experienced in making this life-altering decision to leave and deconstruct her faith as she knew it. Leah opens up about the toxic purity culture that permeated our upbringing, s...

In this episode, I get to catchup with an old friend from childhood, Jonathon Lopez. A Waco native who now lives in Austin, Jonathon is part software developer, musician, and budding astrologer. In our talk, he shares about the dichotomy that was created in him when he was introduced to the christian church, creating a new sense of right and wrong and becoming a judge for himself and others. Some...

In this episode, I share my transformative experience at a silent retreat at Mepkin Abbey. Leaving my phone at home, I immersed myself in the monks’ peaceful routines and connected deeply with an unexpected friend, an 84-year-old Buddhist practitioner, whose wisdom and warmth sparked profound personal insights. Join me as I recount these enriching encounters, the joy of being present, and the less...

In this episode, I want to share some insights I’ve recently gained about respecting others' emotional boundaries, understanding how fear of the unknown can lead to conflict in relationships and its roots in the fear of abandonment, and how our inner drive to help others can sometimes hinder our ability to truly love them.

In this episode, I delve into my "spiritual awakening" moment and how my body instinctively used an ancient technique to connect more deeply with the Divine. I also share my thought process as I tried to make sense of it all afterward, noticing signs and strange coincidences that seemed to urge me to overcome my fear while questioning, "I'm not going crazy, right?"

I have my first guest on the show, my long time close friend, Jake Augustini. Jake is a fellow Texan, a singer/songwriter, someone who has worked in tech for the past decade, a world traveler, and shares a love for humor and understanding why we think the way we do. We discuss an array of topics including: The risk of telling people about one’s creative endeavors Identity structures surrounding ca...

In my first podcast, I discuss my journey from being raised in a Christian non-denominational church, to becoming agnostic, and then experiencing what some would call a spiritual awakening. I share my struggles with self-criticism and fear of judgment, which I hope to overcome through the podcast. I also talk about my experiences with therapy, discovering I have ADHD, and my exploration of psyched...