Slappin' Bird

Send a text Jeffrey Epstein reportedly dies by suicide by hanging. A mysterious suicide "tape".  Ice Cream Jones.  The Handjob Witch. Stericycle? How are they all connected?  In this episode we take you on a rollercoaster of drama and action as we begin to unravel the story of how Jeffrey Epstein killed himself, and why.  We are joined by Damien as we uncover disturbing details about the...

Send a text Without a guest and without Alex again, we are left to our own devices.  We imagine what its like at Graceland; if Elvis was "alive", and much more. Step into the weird world of Slappin' Bird. Enjoy. Leave a comment.  Get some stickers and magnets.   Follow us on Instagram @SlappinBirdPod

Send a text This week we're joined by Turtle, a vagrant from Warwick who spends his time on Twitter making fake accounts just to harass and stalk Lebron James. We're also joined by Ben, a longtime substitute for Alex, who is dead. We break tradition and check in on everyone's mental health (very important) and namedrop everyone who spent time on Epstein's Island, a billionaire&...

Send a text In this episode we are joined by Brian, one of three people in the world to have his body totally encapsulated by the same skin that comprises your dick head (or glans).  He is joined by his surgeon, Jean-Claud Long, who explains how the entire mix-up happened, and then our halftime musician performs a new song for us, "Pizza Bun"! We are so excited to hear their material, yo...

Send a text In this episode we welcome back Rene Reyes, a longtime associate, who offers some wisdom on milking tables, UFOs, Joe Rogaine, and who to vote for on 2020 and we embark on a strange journey with the Handjob Witch.  Enjoy.   As always, this Podcast is Way Better than "Yeah But Still", "The Joe Rogans Experience", among others.  Please do not confuse the quality of Sl...

Send a text The Slappers return with Benjamin Netanyoohoo, recently released from prison, to interrogate him on his motives for the dreaded incident of moist chamber invasion and proceed to a casual evening of discussing mons enlargement, strange anus (and what that means for the future), and we admonish Stericycle of all wrongdoing as per our contractual obligation.  Intro song: “Jesus is the One...

Send a text We miss you Scatman! Love you.   Follow us on Instagram @SlappinBirdPod

Send a text Ben commandeers the podcast after drugging Greg and Nico and hiding them in the Vatican root cellar. Ben becomes an official member of Stericycle's Soul Squadron, forming a small cadre of acolytes that worship the occult and form a suicide pact.  Ice Cream Jones launches an assault on ice cream made from cow's milk, and things round out after a moving rendition of "Don&a...

Send a text Welcome back to Slappin' Bird Podcast. Our first guest after a much-needed hiatus is a man who lost feeling in his penis and then got it back. We have Rob Pierce with us, a stand-up comic who performs at the Comedy Connection frequently, sit down with us and razzle your frazzle for a show bedazzled with creampies, werewolves, and vocal male orgasms!  Follow Rob Pierce: @robpierces...

Send a text This week we're joined by a Mysterious Presence Called Denim Dan, who refers to himself only in the third-person, and is obsessed with denim, denim care, and denim culture.  We discuss Denim Dan's Denim Compound, a secret place where Dan launders denim; Dan learns the meaning of Edging, and why its so popular.  Audacity fucked up our audio file this week so it got shot full o...

Send a text This week we appeared as esteemed guests on the Downcity Podcast, a group of wannabe comics who were deeply disturbed by our presence.  The Downcity Podcast likes to cover current events and other offhand topics, while we like to discuss how the taste of Bear Cheese or Bris Bliss Ice Cream tastes.   We attempted to make a hard-line stance on Bear Milk as the next big food trend in the...

Send a text This week we're joined by the Downcity Podcast (Alex Iovino and Ryan Chase) to discuss why Donald Trump is the MOST accomplished president to receive a happy ending, why bears are the greatest threat to humanity, and why "the world needs a famine" (according to Alex).  As usual each guest was paired up with one of our Equine Associates as well as indentured into Ice Crea...

Send a text Alex Wallace joins us for some animal talk to disclose the secret behind the lives of animals that are born from eggs and have no nipples.   Follow Alex on Instagram: @ajax_the_monsta Follow us: @slappinbirdpod

Send a text In one of our most theatrical episodes to date, we recap the past few episodes in an epic montage of real audio from an upcoming motion picture produced by Paramount recounting the story of Nico having his scrotum ripped off by one of our equine associates; we introduce our guest Mike Muniz, who hails from Connecticut and happens to be a fan of the podcast but also a very good friend o...

Send a text Wow! What a moving aria!

Send a text Old Bay! Put it on your Body! Follow us on Instagram: @ slappinbirdpod

Send a text Nate returns to settle the score, drink more NyQuil, and tell us the story of how he spent 10 days in prison for refusing to blow a cop.  After this episode aired he was thrown in prison for trafficking kids into slave camps in Ukraine.   We're also joined by Benjamin Netanyahoo, our frequent contributor.   Follow Ben: @intragnizant

Send a text This week we lost Nico to the brutal grip-strength of one of the equine associates, much to the chagrin of our beloved guest, Rene (@thehuman.will on Instagram), who is given the grim task of rifling through Nico's plasma-soaked belongings to find a note revealing his whereabouts.  Luckily, Nico will be back after some reconstructive surgery in Brazil.  We took some time to discus...

Send a text You'll only hear it on Slappin Bird.  Eric Clapton performs his last set EVER and we are the only ones with the audio.  

Send a text This week we had our highest-paid guest to date come on to tell us about his activities.  Nate is an artist, electrician, father, and bestiality enthusiast who resides in Cranston, Rhode Island.  A life-long RI native, Nate sheds some lights on some of his favorite things about Providence, the divine city, why the West End is the real Providence, talks about things he doesn't like...

Send a text This week we're joined by fellow comics and podcasters from The Pregame Podcast, to partake in some good old local camaraderie of drinking, fighting, and swearing at each other loudly from across the room.  We touch lightheartedly on a myriad of topics such as the pwesident serving hamburters, The Government Shutdown, the threat level of Baby Nation, the Spectrum of Fuck-Boyness (...

Send a text In Episode 15, our news team addresses the global threat of Baby Nation, an extremely dangerous army of babies bent of taking control of world power.  However, the only one who seems to be in tune to this development is Enrique Iglesias, who has called to arms all of the "Awoken" to fight the Baby Nation and defeat Bruce, their leader.  We unpack the newscast and the entire i...

Send a text This week in our return we discuss some hot topics like the return of disgraced stand-up comedian Louis CK, and explore other topics that are unrelated like experimental wiping techniques, the role of Stericycle in bear attacks, and how to increase survivability to 100% for the winter months.   We also play some clips of our favorite moments in our first thirteen episodes, hoping that...

Send a text In a somber episode, we discuss the death of a our planned guest, Jim Strongbach, and the incarceration of our backup guest Scott.  We discuss the early days of the internet, and Alex introduces his "surprise" policy of BDO - Big Dicks Only.  We discuss whether Ariana Grande is a mythical succubus who seduces men towards death.  And finally, we Big Up Sean and Ice Cream Jones...

Send a text This week we're joined by our friend S**n.  He shares some stories of drug abuse, expertise in baking, and attempts to remain anonymous while admitting to dicking down our moms behind a deli counter the offers award-winning meats.   Alex peddles a theory that baby's foreskins are being harvested by the rich to be used in luxuriously creamy face lotions, and loses his mind ove...