My Act Four

When you’re operating with a business mindset, you do exactly the opposite of what I recently did. I should know: I ran my own successful consulting business for over a decade. And I wouldn’t have recommended to any of my clients to do what I’ve just done. I took down my website--my decades-old blog disappeared with it–and I deleted my Facebook, Instagram and Twitter accounts.

Post election and post visit to the Midwest, I review what I’ve learned about protecting my peace.

Messing up the sound on last week’s podcast wasn’t a big deal. Except for the ten minutes between the discovery of the problem and my decision to delete and re-record the episode. My thoughts during those ten minutes weren’t pretty. I’d like very much to shorten the time I spend in shame in the future. Because it’s completely in my power to do so. On the bright side, it reminded me of a time when...

What would you do if you had more time? If you’re someone who doesn’t think she has enough time, I learned something today that you might find helpful: most of us spend 32% of our time stuck in the past or worrying about the future. That means that we’re only spending 68% of the time we’ve been given in the present. Can you imagine what your life would look like if you stopped time traveling? I’ve...

My husband is gone for three weeks, so I’ve decided to recalibrate and reset. I was surprised when I encountered overwhelm. Here’s how I found clarity and got back on track.

By popular request, this episode is dedicated to listeners who are or are about to turn 40. Here’s a list of things I wish I would have known nearly 20 years ago. What would you add?

I’ve just been informed that I only have two Paps left in my future, and I couldn’t be happier. Except when I remember what comes next. Who else finds it difficult to be in the moment you’re in?

Adult children who choose to go no contact with their parents are often seen as the villain. In this episode I unpack my experience with being estranged from my own mother after years of abuse.

In this episode I talk about the single most popular episode I’ve recorded. Not if you’re counting downloads, but in the sheer number of people who wrote to tell me that different parts of it resonated with them. Or commented on my TikToks–I broke the episode down into a series of eight–some in tears, some with questions. The TikTok views alone are at 196.2K which astounds me. I talk about what re...

Who else has ever wanted to tell your husband/wife/partner to fuck all the way off? I doubt I’m the only one. Maybe it's the year of our Lord 2024, truly the year of the woman. Maybe it's retirement. Too much time together. But I don’t think so.  I think it has more to do with naive, rose-colored expectations of what a marriage would look like.  Did anyone else grow up under the impression that lo...

When I’m at the gym I find thought distortions creeping in. If you’re unfamiliar with the term, these are the thoughts that are either untrue or unhelpful. Or, in my case both. So I ask myself, “What other lies am I telling?”

What do you wish you would have known sooner? I’ve made a list. A whole lot of it looks like leaning more into myself and less into perfection. What would you add?

Remember that job I was asked to apply for? It starts today! In today’s episode I explain how I handle stress and disappointment.  Here’s a link to a photo of me with my goats .

I’ve been feeling very unsettled this past week. I can’t quite put my finger on why, but it probably has something to do with uncertainty. And there are several reasons for that, but for me it all comes down to fear.    So what’s the antidote to uncertainty? I have a couple of strategies, and they all revolve around taking action.

Yesterday I hopped onto my new health insurance’s website. As I poked around I came across a health assessment test, and I took it. What pushed me right over the edge was they asked for a waist measurement. So I got out the tape measure and pulled up my t-shirt. 39 inches! You’ve gotta be kidding me!    I guess these health assessment people know what they’re doing, because immediately after recor...

Remember how in the last episode I talked about being a recovering perfectionist? Well, you’ll never believe what happened while I was in Virginia. I was asked to apply for a job. And my perfectionism reared its ugly head. I talk about how I’m overcoming it.

What does being a recovering perfectionist look like? I remind myself that it doesn't matter what I did yesterday. It doesn't matter what I did ten minutes ago.  My future isn't written yet. It's not decided by my past. It's decided by what I do today. Right now. Small steps count.

How could a person be tired when they didn’t go to work? When they didn’t have responsibilities. When they spent their days golfing, working out at the gym, hiking, fishing, and happy hour-ing with friends.   It’s taken me two weeks of my husband being retired to remember that feeling tired isn’t odd. It’s part of being human.   What is it about our culture that condones naps only for babies? And...

“You’ve gotten funnier over time.” I was taken aback when my husband said this to me after what I acknowledge was a particularly witty exchange. “I think that’s because I’m more myself than I used to be.” He agreed. And that gave me pause. What does it mean to be more myself? I’m not entirely sure, but I remember deciding to stop pretending to be someone else when I pitched projects to potential c...

Unbeknownst to us we’ve “put everything in place that we needed.” And not only did we save enough money to retire but retire early, and buy a fucking condo. We’re buying a condo! Can you believe this?! So what else do I want? When you’ve just gotten more than you ever could have imagined, it’s hard to think bigger. Ironically. Right? It feels like we’re climbing Everest and we’ve reached base camp...

I guess I expected everyone would be happy for us when my husband announced that he was going to be retiring next month. Or maybe that they would at least pretend to be happy? I don’t know. But that has not been the case. In this episode I talk through what I've learned about friendship.

When I rebooked my departure flight to Iowa, called my mother-in-law and canceled the week’s plans, there was also a whole lot of discomfort around the disruption. I mean so much! I felt nauseated in my body, and incredibly anxious. But I figured out how to flip that feeling, and I learned a lot from this visit about practicing being present.

This was supposed to be the episode where I talk about my Iowa trip. What I learned–some of it I’m still unpacking–and an update on my liver. But that’s going to have to wait until next week. Because our landlords have made us an offer to sell the condo to us, and I am shooketh.

Today I'm joined by Renee Spears. She shares how she moved from mortgage company owner to  spirit guide channeler and spiritual, life and business mentor at Abundology.com. I ask her what we should do when we don't know what's next. Spoiler alert: eat chocolate and do puzzles.   If you are someone who wants to live her best life and are looking for clarity, book a session with Renee. https://www.a...

We all know people who can support us. And they want to support us. Some may be generalists, some specialists. Or it may just be someone who sees you. Who gets you.    We know people. Create a list. Ask them for help. This group of people is your personal board.