Little Deaths

We want to be well, we want to rest, we want to be seen and celebrated, we want to be paid for our art, we want black women to stop settling for breadcrumbs, we want it all! In my second Cracked Conversation after a massive hiatus, I'm chatting with my friend til the end and creative collaborator Khyelle Anthony (@khyellemango). We get deep into our relationships with chronic health issues and...

Welcomed to Cracked Conversations where I'll be chatting with black women about how chronic perfectionism has affected their physical bodies, their relationship to self, and what the hell is healing anyway? This is Taylor Harris-Butler! Guys, she's my new favorite person. Her grounded wisdom, her vibrancy, her wit and her laugh my gosh! We really got into it. She's an actor, a writer,...

I turned 35 last week and I've been flooded by love, genuine connection, unforgettable New York experiences, and those ever present mirrors creating a road map for my next stages of growth and expansion. I'm over the moon to have the privilege of not only seeing this age, when so many have not, but also having access to the tools, the community, and the awareness to both celebrate where I...

For YEARS I've wanted to try stand up, but perfectionism has been holding me back. I finally faced my fear! Listen to me throw some pasta at the wall and see what sticks.

Apparently perfectionism is just ego....so I'm getting out of my own way! Also, is chronic dissatisfaction a thing???

One example of a God moment is when you're about to write someone off, but you push past the discomfort, get vulnerable, set your ego aside, and then magic happens! This is one of those kinds of stories. I'm sorry I say like so much...I'm really gonna work on that!

Welcome to Season 2 of Little Deaths! After a little hiatus, I'm back, and I'm fired up. During my recent trip to NYC, I feel like I stepped through a portal. In this episode I'm talking about how I did it and what it felt like. And I'm calling in so much more! Let's just leap through portal after portal together ohKURR!

The truth is, I don’t enjoy being a Universe cruncher...but I just gotta speak up to protect me and mine. Even when I have to do that shit completely alone.

We don't need another love song, we need a love BOMB. To just blow us away :) 

"You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take." -Wayne Gretzky MICHAEL SCOTT

Do-ga-do   you-ga-do   ma-ga-da-stur-ga-dur-ba-ga-date? Is that like pig latin for do you masturbate? For some reason I have a very clear memory of boys in middle school repeating this phrase to which the girls all responded NO!!!!!!! We were horrified at the accusation. And then we all went home and humped our pillows.

How can it be a new year when it's still the dead of winter? I don't know about you, but I'm still hibernating. I'm patiently (and sometimes not so patiently) waiting for the path to become clear. And that's okay.

I've been asking myself...am I worthy of love when my skin is doing crazy things? Can I let myself be seen when my appearance is completely out of my control? Can I show up fully even when my presentation to the world isn't what I want it to be? In theory, yes. But the practice has proven to be a lot more complicated. 

On this Portland evening I learned two things: sensual body rolls and random sex with a stranger was not going to heal the pain of being rejected. And no one, and I mean NO ONE, can botch a one night stand in the most dramatic of fashions, the way that I can :) *ALSO- for all of you consistent listeners out there, from now on I'll be releasing a new episode EVERY FRIDAY!

"God is Change."- Octavia Butler 

I don't know anyone whose parents really nailed the birds and the bees conversation. And we all know that public schools failed us. But this concept of purity certainly did a number on me. I think I might need a couple of episodes to unravel this :)

The parts of me that he activated never BELONGED to him. I didn't NEED him. I just didn't know it yet.

Looking back on all of this ten years later, it’s really not the possibility of crossing the line that bothers me the most. It’s the fact that his love was conditional.

Sometimes a mega meltdown is the best gift you could possibly ask for. 

Consider this an invitation. An invitation to my inner journey. To witness my process and progress in real time. We've all died a million little deaths in our lives. And if we're lucky, we'll die a million more before we're through!