Evolutionary Men

In this episode I explore a lesser-known aspect of the saying "If it doesn't challenge you, it doesn't change you" that can be particularly hard for men!

In this episode, I explore the significance of having a safe place to return to after facing setbacks or feelings of shame in life, and how the power of a men's group and community can be the key to moving beyond our shame by giving us a place to consciously come back to relationship.

In this episode, I'm once again joined by Luke Adler to explore the sense of hurt and disconnection that many men are experiencing today, and how having the courage to feel is the medicine we desperately need as men to drop below all the surface-level forces that try to pull us away from our discomfort, whether it be relationally, politically, cultural, or from dopamine overloads. This is one...

In this episode, I delve into the topics of purpose and passion, two crucial aspects of a man's life. Contrary to a lot of the talk in the world of men's work, finding our purpose is often a lot less straightforward than we think, and not always as simple as "do what you love" or "follow your passion". Whether you love what you do or are yearning for something more when it...

In this episode of the Heart of Shadow series, Luke Adler and I discuss the impact of shadow work on long-term relationships. We share our own experiences of how shadow work has transformed our marriages and how important the work has been to maintain vitality and prevent stagnation. We explore the need for personal responsibility and owning one's pain and wounding in order to avoid projecting...

Anger and aggression are NOT the same thing, and the most dangerous men are aggressive men who aren't aware of their anger.   In this episode I break down the all-important difference between anger and aggression, and talk about the three keys to embodying healthy anger in the world, and why our planet needs a whole lot more men doing it. Want a safe container to explore your anger in? Check o...

In this episode, my co-host Luke Adler and I talk about why us men can be so hard on themselves. We delve into the roots of this harshness and scrutinize its impact on overall health and happiness. Drawing from personal experiences and knowledge gained from our work with men, we provide viable strategies to navigate through the maze of self-criticism and work towards a healthier self-perception. W...

In this episode, I explore 'Nice Guy Syndrome', its origins, and how to overcome it. Using Dr. Gabor Mate's idea of two primary human needs: attachment and authenticity, I explore how men often suppress their authentic selves to secure attachment, leading to Nice Guy Syndrome. I then discuss how reclaiming authenticity is one of the most powerful uses of men's groups, and how doing...

In this episode, Luke Adler joins me once more to explore an issue many men experience - stagnation, or feeling stuck. Men in particular often suffer from emotional stagnation, manifesting as feelings of despair, depression, or emotional numbness - all of which can have serious physical and spiritual consequences.  Luke enlightens us with his knowledge of Chinese medicine, explaining how emotional...

Discover the key to shifting your patterns and attracting better intimate partners and deeper connections through the power of inner work. Join The Heart of Shadow men's group now at heartofshadow.com

In this episode, I discuss two important concepts related to men and masculinity: precarious manhood and the man box. The first refers to the sociocultural belief that manhood is a fragile status that needs to be constantly defended, while the latter is a societal construct that dictates norms and expectations for men. These concepts contribute to systemic issues that create many challenges for me...

In this episode, I once again explore loneliness among men and highlight the detrimental health risks associated with lacking meaningful connections. Then I break down the difference between loneliness and social isolation, the importance of the quality of our connections over the quantity, and how men's groups can provide the depth of connection so many men are missing. Register for the Heart...

In this episode, I explore one of the main ways men often keep themselves stuck. Many of us will default to soothing ourselves when in distress instead of focusing on actual healing. Tune in to learn the difference between the temporary relief of soothing and the long-term change that comes from healing.

In this episode, discover the importance of doing your 'emotional work' as a man in order to thrive in life. Our emotions can greatly impact our stress levels, health, decision-making capabilities, and how much others trust us. This is a topic you won't want to miss.

In this episode I break down three of the big reasons I see men show up in men's group and step onto the path of men's work.

Long time listeners know that I believe every man should be in a men's group, and in this episode I dive into one of the many reasons why: they can help us get clear about what we need and want in our lives and relationships.

Attention and Tension are two terms that are deeply related when it comes to what makes the masculine inside all of us tick. The ability to consciously wield our attention is a great power and easier to do when we hold less tension in our bodies.

In this episode I unpack a common phrase: "Well, I had a pretty good childhood" to explore what lies beneath this common phrase, why it's so commonly used by nice guys, and how our childhood can be the key to our growth as adults.

An all too easy trap on the path of growth is to get hyper-focused on enlightenment, which if we're not careful can become just another way to get away from one's experience. Join me and my fellow Heart of Shadow facilitator Luke Adler as we talk about what's possible when we focus on the path of intimacy instead. As a men's guide, I'm increasingly convinced most men need to be...

One of the many gifts of shadow work is how it can help us crack open to the deepest parts of ourselves, bringing us into more intimate contact with all of who we are. In this episode, Luke and I explore what it means to crack open and bring our buried shadow elements to the surface to be met with awareness and light. Are you ready to dive into shadow work and experience the power of a men's g...

Dating can be an exhausting enterprise for many men and can feel like a neverending battle that can get very disheartening, especially if we lose sight of the true purpose of dating. Tune in to this episode to find out how to reclaim your power as a man so that you know your purpose in dating.

Want to take your relationship to the next level as a man? One of the more important changes you make has to do with how you receive feedback or hurt from a partner when they've been impacted by you in a negative way. It's easy for us guys to "lawyer up" in these moments instead of showing up first as a lover. Listen in to learn more about being a lover, not a lawyer!

Sexuality is one of the most powerful energies on the planet and one that can easily cause great harm if not matched with consciousness. We're living in a time when we men have the opportunity to take charge of our sexual charge and use it generatively rather than destructively. In this episode of our Heart of Shadow series, my co-facilitator Luke Adler and I talk about how important it is for...

When it comes to any kind of meaningful practice, the aim is to train at the edges of our capacity and stretch ourselves so that we can live with more ease back in the middle. Tune in to find out how this shows up in all facets of men's work, be it physical, emotional, or spiritual practice. 

Ever had one of those moments or days, when you just FEEL OFF, be it stressed, depressed, anxious, or unmotivated? Listen to this episode as I explore the three keys you can use to regain your center and come back to yourself in a grounded and regulated way. Men's work is a powerful way to put these combined keys into action, so check out my upcoming 3.5 day retreat over Labor Day if you'd...