Dynamite Divorce and other matters (DDOM)

Minnesota Attorney Shelley Torvinen finally found us in the big city (Chicago) after a  long drive to our virtual studio * .  With a promise of hot chocolate and plenty of encouragement, we coaxed her from her car, walked her through our weed-strewn parking lot, and down the stairs past a creaky iron door, to a rusty office chair.  We cleared away a pile of spiders and dust, gave her a seat at the...

We met with Attorney Carmen Quinones, from Wilmette (a suburb of Chicago.)  She's fun to talk with.  Parking her car in our weed-strewn parking lot and making it safely down the stairs to our drafty, underground virtual studio, Carmen brought a wealth of knowledge, kindness and good humor to our round-table discussion.  She has uncounted years of experience, both as a psychology professional...

In this Episode 42 - recorded on May 8th, 2024, Marjie, Barry and Kevin host retired Judge Mark Lopez, formerly of the Cook County (IL) Circuit Court, Domestic Relations Division.  In this wide-ranging discussion, Judge Lopez shares some insights and perspectives from his 22 years on the bench.   Some topics are: Should you be scared to appear in Court? How are judges chosen in Cook County? What d...

In this Episode 41 - recorded on January 19, 2024, Marjie, Barry and Kevin sit down with former prosecutor ('Assistant State's Attorney') Igor Bozic to talk about Juvenile Court -- and the RISKS that parents face in not maintaining a calm, steady atmosphere around their children at home. How does the Illinois child-protection agency (DCFS) begin focusing on you and your family?    S...

In this Episode 40 - recorded on September 8, 2023, Marjie (our new co-host), Barry and Kevin sit down with: Doctor of Psychology Pascale Piron  https://emergepg.com/pascale-piron ,  for a look behind the mental-health curtain.   Psychologist, therapist, counselor -- what's difference (other than cost?)  Can all of them do counseling?  testing?  evaluations?   Why therapy for kids is good, an...

In this Episode 39 - recorded on July 20, 2023, Barry and Kevin answer some of the questions commonly asked of them by non-lawyers.   There are links included below, including "Illinois Legal Aid Online," for people who would like some online help in preparing legal documents.  While some of the questions and answers are specific to Cook County Circuit Court in Illinois, there are also s...

Back from a summer break, Barry and Kevin are again ready to ruminate and pontificate on the practice of family law.  They are joined today by Chicago Attorney Clare McMahon from Hoffenberg & Block , who bravely wades into this wide-ranging discussion about the "Best Ideas and Worst Ideas in Family Law."   In this Episode 38 - recorded in early December, 2022, Clare, Barry and Kevin...

In this Episode 37 - recorded on a hot day in June, 2022, Barry and Kevin discuss an insider's view of negotiating settlement agreements -- the kind that become divorce judgments, parenting-time orders, and custody ('allocation') judgments. When you receive a 20-page parenting-time proposal, what should you look for?  How about "drop dead" ('self-executing') sent...

In this Episode 36 - recorded in May, 2022, Barry and Kevin discuss what happens after a Divorce, Allocation Judgment or other Court Order has been entered.  All that work, all the thinking and negotiating and planning -- so easy to fall apart or not work as planned. Kevin and Barry shares some stories and techniques for smoothing the way to the rest of your life -- your life after Court, when you...

2021 was a busy year for our podcast, with a multitude of guests sharing ideas, hopes, dreams, techniques and behind-the-scenes secrets from their real-world experience.  A bunch of lawyers and one Doctor of Psychology, what could go wrong? In this Episode 35 - recorded in February, 2022 without a net, and without a guest, Barry and Kevin remember and summarize the hours and hours of 'Dynamit...

SEE THE LINKS BELOW! Safety and freedom.  Who wouldn't want that?   But abusive partners, spouses and other family members can put the  safety and freedom of you and your children at risk.   No one should live in constant fear of physical or emotional harm .  Agencies, advocates and the legal system stand ready to help.     On the other hand, no one should lose his or her home, children or fr...

Parents.  Children.  Money.  Power.  Control.  Disabled adults.    What could go wrong? This podcast is about "Guardianship."   It sounds like a blanket of comfort and protection.   "Guardianship."  The power to decide, for adults and children who can't.  Protection against bad decisions and wasted assets sounds good!  But having a guardian could mean the loss of control....

Parents.  Children.  Money.  Power.  Control.  Disabled adults.    What could go wrong?  This podcast is about "Guardianship."   It sounds like a blanket of comfort and protection.   "Guardianship."  The power to decide, for adults and children who can't.  Protection against bad decisions and wasted assets sounds good!  But having a guardian could mean the loss of control....

Often added to the legal and emotional turmoil of a divorce, custody, parentage, child-support or other family-law dispute are pressures over unpaid bills and debts.  Banks and other creditors sometimes try to collect for a while, but when they give up, they "charge off" the debt and sell it to a "debt buyer" for 3 or 4 cents on the dollar.  Then, a semi-automated collection ca...

Often added to the legal and emotional turmoil of a divorce, custody, parentage, child-support or other family-law dispute are pressures over unpaid bills and debts.  Banks and other creditors sometimes try to collect for a while, but when they give up, they "charge off" the debt and sell it to a "debt buyer" for 3 or 4 cents on the dollar.  Then, a semi-automated collection ca...

" We fought over the divorce, but now that it's over, my ex won't stop fighting about our children!  Never a moment's peace!  It's always one thing or another -- my ex always looks for exceptions and loopholes in our parenting agreement, and I'm always having to defend my actions and my time with my child! "  IS THERE NO END?  After a highly-contested court case...

" We fought over the divorce, but now that it's over, my ex won't stop fighting about our children!  Never a moment's peace!  It's always one thing or another -- my ex always looks for exceptions and loopholes in our parenting agreement, and I'm always having to defend my actions and my time with my child! "  IS THERE NO END?  After a highly-contested court case...

This is terrible!  First, I'm forced into a court battle for my child's future, now I have to be "evaluated" to see if I'm a good parent?  OF COURSE I'm a good parent!   It's my ex who's causing all the problems and lying about me!  I hope the "professionals" will see that! In highly-contested child-custody and parenting-time cases, a judge will so...

This is terrible!  First, I'm forced into a court battle for my child's future, now I have to be "evaluated" to see if I'm a good parent?   OF COURSE I'm a good parent!   It's my ex who's causing all the problems and lying about me!  I hope the "professionals" will see that! In highly-contested child-custody and parenting-time cases, a judge will s...

I'm still having nightmares about my custody case! How can I get past this?  How can I find peace and protect my kids from further trauma?  Maybe I should share my inner feelings with my kids and lean on them for emotional support! (WHAT?!)                                          In this  Episode 29, PART TWO , Recorded on 6/4/2021, Barry, Kevin and special guest Andrea Rice share their inte...

I'm still having nightmares about my custody case! How can I get past this? How can I find peace and protect my kids from further trauma? Maybe I should share my inner feelings with my kids and lean on them for emotional support! (WHAT?!)                                          In this  Episode 29, PART ONE , Recorded on 6/4/2021, Barry, Kevin and special guest Andrea Rice share their intell...

The Judge is giving my little son his own lawyer?  But I'm his parent!  I know him better than anyone!                                            In this  Episode 28, PART ONE , Recorded on 4/23/2021, Barry, Kevin and special guest Modupe Sobo share their battle-scarred war stories about the 'Guardians ad litem' and 'Child Representatives' that judges often appoint for chi...

The Judge is giving my little son his own lawyer?  But I'm his parent!  I know him better than anyone!                                            In this  Episode 28, PART TWO , Recorded on 4/23/2021, Barry, Kevin and special guest Modupe Sobo share their battle-scarred war stories about the 'Guardians ad litem' and 'Child Representatives' that judges often appoint for chi...

Custody!  Divorce!  Parenting time!  Money!  Disagreements over children!      SEE THE LINKS BELOW! Tell the kids!  Don't tell the kids!   Hope they don't notice!   In this                                           Episode 27, PART TWO , Recorded on 3/5/2021, Kevin, Barry and special guest Patrick Denkwa John expound and explain a tricky, sensitive topic:  How to talk to kids about their...

Custody!  Divorce!  Parenting time!  Money!  Disagreements over children!      SEE THE LINKS BELOW! Tell the kids!  Don't tell the kids!   Hope they don't notice!   In this                                           Episode 27, PART ONE , Recorded on 3/5/2021, Kevin, Barry and special guest Patrick Denkwa John expound and explain a tricky, sensitive topic:  How to talk to kids about their...