Chasing The Connection

This week we review our childrens attachment needs and what we can do to support them. Practical ideas informed by the science of attachment Did you know you can access professional support directly with Laura, a registered therapist with a specialism in children and teens mental health and well-being. Book a free chat at www.leadapproach.com   

We take a deep dive into the science of attachment, how children are meant to connect with their parents and carers. We look at the hierarchy of attachment and its development, as defined by Dr Neufeld. We touch on how children can get stuck in behaviour patterns when they are not deeply attached and how these can become personality traits. This episode forms the foundation of our next one where w...

Welcome to Season 3 with a review of our approach. The LEAD approach is the foundation of Chasing the Connection. We discuss what it is, how it came into being and ultimatley how connection between children and parents supports everyone. Join us as we lay out the intention for our next 8 episodes focussed on each pillar of the approach:  Living, Emotion, Attachment and Development.  --------------...

Following our last episode, we go deeper into our values and beliefs. Our scientific understanding of attachment walks hand in hand with our faith in Nature or Christianity. In this sense Nature or G-d can act as a caring lead in our lives and provide us with the Rest we need to be our kids 'best bet'. -------------------------------------------------------------------- To fix or not to fix their...

Hamaima Love, Director of Mission On Earth, shamanic practitioner and previously social worker, describes her project to raise awareness of our sensitive little ones, our starseed children, and provide support for their families. MOE has guides and coaches from many backgrounds, offering online sessions for parents, including inner child work, homeopathy, healing modalities and more. Laura also ru...

Life brings stress for parents but how do we safeguard our kids from this? What can we control in uncontrollable situations? A controlled explosion maybe, tears of futility, a strong relationship. No easy answers but an important topic that we enjoyed discussing. --------------------------------------------------------------------- To fix or not to fix their behaviours'. A compliance-based approac...

What has changed in our parenting practices? Gordon Neufeld identifies 'peer orientation' as a key phenomenon.   In the LEAD approach we identify the 'Caring LEAD' and our children's 'Attention to the Connection' as our primary focus, our 'One Thing'. Recommended: "The One Thing" by Gary Keller & Papasan -------------------------------------------------------------------- To fix or not to fix thei...

Welcome back Mike and Amy from your holiday travels, which gives us a great opportunity for today's episode: why it's important to create a homebase, what this looks like and how to support our kids sense of belonging when travelling. Enjoy! --------------------------------------------------------------------- To fix or not to fix their behaviours. A compliance-based approach tries to fix children...

An initial exploration into the efficacy of intervention with children with complex needs. What might we be missing and what might be needed for change in the profession? PROMPT trained Holly Maya Greenwood, SALT, at www. WildChorusTherapies.com discusses her experience with children she supports. Mike reflects on the support Holly has provided for their family and why it's different to other form...

Our parenting experiences in Speech Therapy and the importance of meeting our children's need for connection and seeing the whole child. Is the profession changing to meet the relational needs of children with speech and language differences?   'To fix or not to fix their behaviours'. A compliance-based approach tries to fix children.   In contrast the LEAD approach is relational, child-led, and r...

What to do with our childrens aggression, in all its forms and how can play help? We talk about using "I wonder..." to have empathic conversations with our children who display frustration. We discuss the kind of play which is   'escapism'   and whether this is sometimes healthy and sometimes not. 'To fix or not to fix their behaviours'. A compliance-based approach tries to fix children.   In cont...

'To fix or not to fix their behaviours'. A compliance-based approach tries to fix children.   In contrast the LEAD approach is relational, child-led, and reflective. We reflect on what's missing, what's driving their behaviour and support the roots of their development, feeling safe and connected. For more direct support with your parenting challenges, you are warmly invited to contact Laura to ha...

As we start the year full of hope for our families, we consider an unlikely source of happiness......tears of sadness. When we, or our children, 'have a good cry', it helps our bodies release stress hormones so they don't get stuck inside. Crying helps us clear out the emotional stuff so we can think and function better on the other side. References:  Facebook/Hand in Hand Parenting, to find a Lis...

Our New Year starts with a passage from Gerard Durrell as we explore his insights about mothering from his childhood memories;  the importance of 'hope' in the face of what can feel 'hope-less'; self compassion as a predecessor to being compassionate parents and navigating the emotional storms with emotional buffering. Refernces: books by Gerard Durrell, The Brave Learner by Jule Bogart For moredi...

Our last episode for 2023 takes us on a brief reflection of past themes, as well as introducing the PRRR model as another way to summarise our parenting approach and WIN as a way of remembering to be empathic with our kids. The PRRR model - Protect Relate Regulate Reflect - comes from TISUK   ( www.traumainformedschools.co.uk ) which supports schools to become trauma and mental health-informed. WI...

We take a deep dive into Neufeld's 6 levels of attachment so we can better understand our kids relationship needs. We weave this in with having realistic expectations (not being the 'perfect' parent), and the importance of their freedom to play and freedom to rest in their relationship with us.  Here's a short explanation that summarises Neufeld's attahcment stages: https://youtu.be/z7LHQwKpryw?si...

This week we take a look at some of the places we experience our childrens' resistance and how that can lead to power struggles . We explain the natural instinct of 'counterwill' as our children feel our 'demands'. And we follow this up with lots of ideas! Once you understand your child's counterwill, it's a natural step towards reducing its presence, particularly when you want to be in your carin...

We all make sacrifices for the sake of our kids but sometimes they are very different to what we expected and planned for. There can be so much to let go of, from our vision of what it was supposed to look like. In this episode we explore what that looks like in our families and why this process of letting go is so important to staying in the caring LEAD with our children. For more direct support...

Remembrance Sunday has brought up losses and nostalgia for when our children were younger, for all the things we wish we'd known then, for missed opportunities for connection. On the flip side, we talk about building our family now, embedding our values and creating opportunities for connection. For more direct support with your parenting challenges, contact Laura at www. ReadySteadyConnect.com to...

We value independence and getting ahead so we unwittingly push our children towards it earlier and earlier. But Nature has her own plan! Our children need to feel safe to depend on us so they can rest in the relationship and deepen their connection.  In this episode Amy, Mike and Laura talk about the importance of children depending on us, how all growth comes from psychological rest and how play...

Sometimes parenting can feel like a constant uphill struggle. Even when we try to connect with our children it can seem like it isn't landing within the hearts of our children or that the more we give, the more they need.    In this episode Amy, Mike and Laura talk about connecting in a way that our children feel the connection and how to keep pursuing connecting moments even when we feel like we'...

Conversations with our children come in all shapes and sizes. Our guest speaker Lynne Kendall, Educational Psychologist and Resilience Tutor from Australia, shines a light on those tricky conversations and how connection is key. Check out Lynne's parenting programmes at www.theresiliencetutor.co.au For more support with having connecting conversations with your children and avoiding those power st...

We all want our children to have resilience in an ever-changing world and to be compassionate towards each other, but here's the thing...these traits are not actually teacheable. Emotional resilience and empathy are the fruits of a strong connection with a caring alpha adult, a natural result of healthy development.  Join Laura, Mike and Amy for an intriguing conversation that invites us to consid...

In this episode, Laura and Mike are joined by special guest Heather Boyd, an Occupational Therapist from Canada who specialises in supporting families through sleep challenges using connection as key. We swap stories of toddlers comandeering all the space in the bed whilst still needing to be touching us, the importance of that last bit of connection before bed and how we as parents can find ways...

We're talking about discipline, some mistakes worth avoiding for the sake of the connection. Join Laura, Mike and Amy for another conversation about the struggles we have and how to help. If you would like support using attachment-friendly strategies with your children, contact Laura at www. ReadySteadyConnect.com