But where are you really from?

Episoda 55 n´Shqip <3 Në këtë episod të shkurtë, foli për jetën teme të ngarkume dhe për librin Kanuni i Lekë Dukagjinit, i cili më ka prekë shumë. Edhe qysh nderkomtart po e kallxojn historin ton dhe po e ndryshojn narrativën per neve. Kjo duhet mu ndal. Historia jon asht narrativa jon. Më ka ba me mendu edhe ma thellë për historinë tonë, identitetin shqiptar dhe randësinë që me e tregu vetë h...

Episode 54 The Lindsay Clancy Trial: A Woman’s Intuition Is Not to Be Messed With In this episode, Marina and I unpack the Lindsay Clancy case and the questions that have led people around the world to ask: what really happened? What begins as a reunion between two old friends becomes an emotional conversation about the trial, the timeline, and the details that continue to trouble us. Marina and I...

Episode 53 I’m reacting to She Who Remains by Rene Karabash, a novel about sworn virgins in northern Albania that has earned international acclaim. As an Albanian reader I feel the book gets important parts of my culture wrong especially its treatment of the Kanun and the tradition of Burnesha. In this episode, I explain why these distinctions matter, and why reducing a deeply specific Albanian tr...

Episode 52 på dansk <3 Episoden handler om min ambivalens omkring at være synlig offentligt. Jeg fortæller om, hvorfor jeg længe har holdt en lav profil online, selvom jeg tidligere var blogger, og hvorfor jeg nu vælger at bruge podcasten, Instagram, YouTube og medierne til at dele min historie. Jeg taler også om min bog, identitet og oplevelser med racisme og tilhørsforhold i Danmark. Jeg refl...

Episode 51 What does it really mean to grow up Albanian in New York, carry a name people misread, and still come out more proud than ever? In this conversation, I open up with Tea about identity, discrimination, diaspora activism, and why Albanian Americans have always been loud, loyal, and impossible to ignore. Tea and I get personal about what it meant to arrive in America as an Albanian family...

Episode 50 Episode Description: I wasn’t actually planning to record this week, but after my recent Copenhagen Post article about my book, the comment sections got… interesting. 📈People are judging my book without reading it, telling me I don’t "look Danish," and asking what I’m even on about. So, I’m hitting record to set the record straight. If you want to tell me I’ll never be Danish...

Episode 49 What if the thing everyone calls a failure is actually the reason you win later? In this episode of But Where Are You Really From? , I make the case that learning how to lose, jobs, relationships, approval, status, even identity, may be one of the most important skills you can develop. As a former Kosovo refugee and author of But Where Are You Really From? , I share how I’ve experienced...

Episode 48 I reflect on my love style and why people often mistake my vibrant personality for someone who falls hard or chases love. For me, real love needs more than intense feelings, it requires honesty, vulnerability, accountability, reciprocity, and consistent action. I talk about refusing to change myself for attention or approval, whether that’s how I dress or how I show up in relationships....

Episode 47 I explore what it means to be Albanian in a world shaped by empires, borders, propaganda, and ongoing struggles for recognition. I take you inside the history, identity, and injustices affecting Albania, Kosovo, and Albanian communities across the Balkans—and explain why recent headlines have brought people into the streets. Drawing on my experience as a Kosovo Albanian refugee who grew...

Episode 46 - Part 2 Manifesting Healthy Love — Dating Outside of Your Culture, Dos and Don’ts | Part 2 In Part 2 of my conversation with Bardha Krasniqi and Anita Lila, we continue our conversation about love, culture, identity and relationships, this time focusing on dating outside of your culture and what it really means to find healthy love . We talk about Bardha’s experience dating outside the...

Episode 45 So excited to share this talk with you all. ❤️ I spoke to Bardha Krasniqi , who, like myself, fled the Kosovo war in 1999. Her family went to the UK, while mine went to Denmark, so there was an immediate point of connection between us. Bardha was also a participant on Love Is Blind UK , which aired in 2025. Joining us is also Anita Lila , my fellow Albanian sista and the woman behind @a...

What is a good apology? Episode 44 This episode explores what makes an apology meaningful. I argue that a real apology takes accountability, acknowledges the other person’s hurt, and is backed up by consistent actions, not phrases like “I’m sorry you felt that way.” I reflect on a recent frustrating experience with a podcast guest whose dismissive behavior and non-apology reinforced the point. Fro...

Episode number 43 In this episode, I sit down with Arina, a Malaysian coach and recovery specialist working in mental health, wellness, fitness, and addiction studies. We talk about her experiences growing up between Malaysia and the UK, her travels through Albania, Kosovo, North Macedonia, and Montenegro, and why Albania made her feel unexpectedly at home. Arina shares how the Balkans reminded he...

Episode 42 Join me on this episode where I welcome lovely Anita back on the podcast for an honest talk about our experiences and our roots <3 This episode is an honest conversation about Albanian womanhood, misogyny, and the pressure many women face within their communities. We reflect on how women are often judged for their bodies, relationships, marriage status, and choices and how that criti...

Episode 41 Join Camilla and I while we are in the car to a Festival in Sweden to see our love, Zara Larsson <3 She is beauty, she is grace, she is Sweden´s best thang <3 So apologies for the sound but enjoy it as a very AUTHENTIC conversation. . In this episode, I’m joined by Camilla to talk about the emotional rollercoaster of hot-and-cold dating behavior. We share our own experiences with...

Episode 40 In this episode, I reflect on whether it’s ethical to bring children into the world. Growing up as a refugee in a single-parent household shaped the way I see parenthood. I witnessed firsthand how difficult it can be to raise children without financial stability, emotional support, or a wider community to rely on. For me, becoming a parent is inseparable from having a loving, dependable...

Episode 39 Some love stories don’t end when the relationship ends, they keep echoing across years, cities, and versions of yourself. I with my longtime friend Steffie unpack the unforgettable New York romance that started on a cheap Chinatown bus, turned into a whirlwind of cab rides, late-night texting, and secret-door dates, and still shapes how they think about love today. What begins as a funn...

Episode 38 This episode is a heartfelt conversation about gratitude, kindness, and the importance of noticing the small good things in life. Malsora shares how becoming a mother made her more aware of everyday blessings, supportive parents, loving family, helpful colleagues, and a caring partner. The discussion highlights that real love often shows up in small actions, like helping with the kids,...

Episode 37 Anita joins Lena Rexhepi for an honest conversation about growing up Albanian in Greece and the feeling of being caught between cultures Albanian in Greece, yet seen as Greek when returning to Albania. She opens up about the fear, isolation, bullying, and pressure she experienced as a child, including the difficulty of speaking openly about her background. Together, Anita and Lena explo...

Episode 36BETRAYAL Trust, Love & the Cost of Overgiving What happens when you love people wholeheartedly, show up for them again and again, and eventually realize the relationship has become deeply one-sided? In this episode, I unpack betrayal, loyalty, overgiving, and the painful realization that love alone isn't always enough to sustain a relationship. I talk about why I meet people with...

Episode 35 A little conversation about Kaltrinë from Germany and Lena from Denmark and how they met in banking and bonded over their Albanian roots. What does it take to build a life, a career, and a company across borders and still stay authentic? Kaltrinë and Lena unpack the realities of growing up as a Kosovo refugee in Germany, navigating identity between cultures, and turning years of experie...

Episode description In this episode I talk about being the eldest daughter and what the eldest daughter syndrome means. being parentified as the oldest daughter growing up as an immigrant/refugee daughter becoming the caretaker for siblings and parents carrying responsibility into school, work, and relationships struggling with boundaries, people-pleasing, guilt, and resentment learning to ask for...

Episode number 33 There is NO PERFECT TIMING. LIFE IS CRINGY. SO WHAT??? REJECTION is part of life. Either you succeed or you fail. Either way, you are in motion. Overthinking is stealing your life, and this episode is the wake-up call you didn’t know you needed. I make the case for brutal simplicity: stop waiting for the perfect plan, stop auditioning for approval, and start doing the thing. Draw...

EPISODE DESCRIPTION number 32 Kindness is not weakness, and if you push the wrong person too far, you might discover exactly why. In this episode, I explore the law of polarity , light and shadow, softness and strength, angel and demon, and what it means to embrace the sides of yourself that people don't always get to see. Then things get very personal. I share the story of being targeted on a...

Grief, Love, Nostalgia, Reflections & Acceptance An episode inspired by Summertime Sadness. What is it about summer that can make us feel so deeply? Why can the brightest days of the year also carry the heaviest emotions? In this episode, I reflect on the strange melancholy that sometimes accompanies summer, a feeling of wanting to fully embrace life while simultaneously missing someone, somet...