Beyond The Glass Slipper

Click here to text us! Congratulations for breaking free from that narcissistic relationship!  Now what? Like it or not, you’ve been forever changed. What kind of change (good or bad) depends on your next move. It doesn’t matter if it’s been 10 months or 10 years since you left that narcissistic relationship. The pain and distortions can still linger and subconsciously hold you back from being who...

Click here to text us! You may have lived for years trying to fix what you were told was wrong with you so the relationship would be better. You probably poured just as much effort into trying to get your loved one to see reason, to work with you to resolve the problems but nothing ever changed. Around and around the mountain you went for what felt like an eternity yet all you got for your efforts...

Click here to text us! Ideally, once you’ve extracted yourself from a narcissistic relationship you never have to see or deal with that person again. However the ideal doesn’t always match our reality. There’s times that encountering or even communicating  with the narcissist is unavoidable  and leaves us feeling shaken and triggered for the rest of the day…or even several days. The last thing you...

Click here to text us! To truly feel whole, light-hearted and free so you can create an incredible personal and professional life moving forward after narcissistic abuse, it’s important to invest in YOU.  Part of this investment involves allocating the time and energy you need to really detoxify your mindset and repair your heart. So many women force themselves to pull up their bootstraps and just...

Click here to text us! After walking through the fires of narcissistic abuse we’re usually left feeling depleted. Somehow the relationship morphed to the point that we were made to feel responsible for the narcissist's needs, while our needs were ignored. Now that we’re free from that toxic relationship things are in many ways so much better. Yet we may still be facing the pain of multiple le...

Click here to text us! After experiencing narcissistic abuse we often struggle to wrap our heads around how this happened.   How could we have allowed ourselves to be so used, so duped? We believed that if we hung in there, looked for the good,  prayed for the best, showed love, tried to resolve issues, and remained committed that somehow it would get better. But it didn’t. Often we invested years...

Click here to text us! We’ve all  had times in our life where we felt like we were not seen, heard, or cared about. When we’ve experienced long term narcissistic abuse, being rejected is commonplace and can leave deep scars that place an anxiety button in our hearts. It doesn’t take much, maybe even just a hint of potential rejection to make the anxiety pop up. Once this happens we have a difficul...

Click here to text us! How long has it been since you got out of that narcissistic relationship? Do you feel like yourself yet? Are there times when you’ve been doing really well but something touches a button in you and things go south in your own head? It doesn’t matter if it’s been 10 months or 10 years since you left that narcissistic relationship. The pain and distortions can still linger and...

Click here to text us! Do you live to make people happy? Are you more concerned with the well being of others even when it’s to your own detriment? Are you in a lot of lop-sided relationships - always giving but rarely receiving? You’re not alone!  This is not only common, but encouraged, especially for women. While it’s a wonderful, Christlike quality to serve and support others, to find joy in h...

Click here to text us! Have you ever experienced this… You start the day in a great mood. You’re moving through the day, being productive, smile on your face, feeling positive….but then someone makes a comment or does something that instantly shifts your mood. You feel your defenses rising on the inside as you bite your tongue - or not. What’s going on? Have you really given away that much power t...

Click here to text us! It doesn’t come naturally to most of us to be self-aware enough all day so we’re able to catch ourselves in the act of allowing our thinking habits  to sabotage us. Sabotage is a pretty strong word, but when it comes to habits of mind, it’s an accurate word. When we slip into any of the 3 negative thinking habits we’re going to be discussing today, it will absolutely trip yo...

Click here to text us! We all have positive and negative thought habits. Sometimes we  train our  minds to think well and it helps us. For example:  Creative problem solving, embracing change, expecting positive outcomes, looking for the good in others When we have healthy thinking habits a good domino effect is put in motion in every dimension of life. However, by virtue of being born a human sur...

Click here to text us! You’ve probably already reflected over the narcissistic relationship and asked yourself, “How did I wind up so duped?”   When I look back over the multiple narc encounters I’ve had, I realized that I projected my qualities and assumptions onto the narc. It would never cross my mind to manipulate, to be a pathological liar, to use people, or knowingly cause them pain. I knew...

Click here to text us! After being involved in a significant relationship with a narcissist, it’s way too easy to continue accepting being devalued in other relationships as you move forward. In some cases, you may have been devalued in profound ways for so long that being devalued in lesser ways feels better so you accept it. Or perhaps you grew up experiencing situations in which you were negati...

Click here to text us! Even though you’re free from daily interaction with that narcissist, it doesn’t mean your thought process and relational defaults are free. You can carry around a “supply mentality” even years later without realizing it. This mentality can become a default setting you kick into  even when dealing with normal people. In the big picture it doesn’t really serve them, serve you,...

Click here to text us! Having been through a narcissistic relationship you’ve probably wondered, “Why me?”   There’s a spiritual component to this as well as a fleshly component and they work hand-in-hand. Contrary to what many people think, narcs don’t necessarily target people who are weak and pitiful. In a weird sort of way, if you were targeted by a narcissist it confirms that you’re an incred...

Click here to text us! Depending on the messages you grew up with and your relational experiences with God and others, you may not have a full picture of what healthy relationships really look like. Add to that possibly skewed foundation, being in a significant relationship with a narcissist and you have a recipe for trouble in future relationships! When you’ve been in the ugly pit of relationship...

Click here to text us! We all have quite a number of falsehoods we’ve believed about ourselves, about relationships, about life, and even about God. Sometimes these falsehoods have a fragment of truth that makes it feel believable and sometimes we’ve embraced outright lies without challenging their validity. Today we’re going to take it to the next step and think about what’s underlying the falseh...

Click here to text us! Even though you’ve ended the narcissistic relationship you may still be carrying some distortions about who you really are. Whether the narcissist in your former relationship managed to drill these distortions into your psyche, or you entered the relationship with some version of these distortions already that the narcissist exploited. It can make a world of difference for y...

Click here to text us! We’ve all experienced many forms of grief arising from loss; loss of a job, of a beloved pet, of a hope or dream, loss of a loved one. It’s generally accepted from researchers, psychologists, and cultural experiences that when we have a big loss in life we’ll walk through generally a 5 stage process before we come to grips with the loss and feel  we’re moving on. Completely...

Click here to text us! In our previous episode we talked about the first two big fat unhealthy mistakes, both of which have to do with another person. The 2 detrimental mistakes we’re going to discuss today involve only what’s going on within ourselves . The real danger zone of slipping up with these 2 big mistakes is highest  in the first year after ending a relationship with a narc, but can happ...

Click here to text us! When your heart’s broken and your identity has endured a beating from the narcissist you were connected with, it’s all too easy to willingly, but blindly, walk into these 2 traps we’re looking at today . It doesn’t look or feel like a trap….at first. It feels really comforting…at first.   It feels really affirming…at first. It feels like a reversal of all the hurt…at first....

Click here to text us! Denis Waitley, a well known motivational speaker for decades once said that a good life is a collection of happy moments. In the early stages of rebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse, life feels more like a series of traumas, disappointments, failures, and hurts, rather than a collection of happy moments. The good news is you can change all that from this point forwa...

Click here to text us! After being with a narc, often it feels like everything meaningful was stripped away and you’re just trudging, just trying to get through the day. As we step into this new year, it can be what we choose to make it. We start not by setting goals, but by clearly choosing and articulating - to ourselves - what’s meaningful and why. Then we write our simple Constitution Statemen...

Click here to text us! It’s that time of year - the lull between Christmas and the kick off of a new year! For many people this is the time where we relax and reflect a bit.  Sometimes we’re thinking of goals for the next year, but often, for those dealing with the fallout of narcissistic abuse, we’re just trying to catch our breath.  The thought of surging forward with shiny new goals into the ne...