Confessions of a Parent Coach

What if the wisest thing you could bring into parenting was the willingness to admit, I don't know? In this episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, Ann shares a personal season of questioning herself as a coach and what it revealed about self-awareness, judgment, and growth. Inspired by the idea, "I know that I know nothing," she explores what changes when we stop assuming we already understand...

You know the pattern. You can see yourself doing it. You may even know exactly why you're doing it. So why can't you just stop? In this episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, Ann Kaplan explores the uncomfortable space between self-awareness and actual behavior change. Sometimes growth doesn't look like improvement yet. Sometimes it looks like noticing yourself yelling, people-pleasing, over-fu...

In this episode, I'm joined by three women from my parenting coaching group for a very real conversation about what brought them to coaching—and what actually changed once they got there. We talk about tantrums, yelling, discipline, permissiveness, control, chaotic mornings, teeth brushing (so much teeth brushing), and the uncomfortable realization that sometimes the work we want to do on our kids...

Sometimes the thing making parenting feel so hard isn't actually your kid's behavior. It's what their behavior brings up in you. In this episode, I'm sharing a powerful moment from my group coaching program when one mom realized how much energy she was spending trying to manage, prevent, or avoid other people's emotions—including her kids'. Her question stopped me in my tracks: "How did I live my...

Ever feel like you're stuck between two options—and somehow both of them feel terrible? Maybe one part of you wants to leave, speak up, set the boundary, lose your temper, or finally do something different. And another part is just as determined to keep the peace, stay safe, be responsible, and not blow up your life. That internal tug-of-war can look like indecision from the outside. But on the in...

Some kids are just… extra. The bedtime boundary becomes a full-body collapse onto the furniture. A disappointing answer becomes a personal tragedy. You calmly say, "No," and suddenly you're apparently responsible for ruining their entire life. And if you're the more peace-loving, level-headed parent in the relationship? It can be incredibly tempting to do whatever you can to avoid setting off the...

If you keep snapping, yelling, controlling, or shutting down with your kids, it's tempting to focus on the behavior you want to stop. But that moment is usually the last domino, not the first. In this episode, Ann breaks down what's happening underneath those reactions — and why actually feeling your emotions is very different from analyzing them, explaining them, or acting on them. Using a powerf...

Here's a confession: people ask me all the time which parenting experts I follow, and the honest answer is none of them. Not because I'm above it — I'm an enormous fan girl. It's just that what I'm immersed in right now is personal growth, not parenting. I've had periods, the way Picasso had periods. My NPR period, when I drove toddlers around Denver quoting things I'd heard on the radio. My Eckha...

If your brain is constantly ten steps ahead—trying to predict what's going to happen, prepare for every possible outcome, or make sure your kid will be okay someday—you're probably calling it responsible. But it might actually be anxiety wearing a very convincing outfit. In this episode, Ann explores what happens when we stop trying to manage a future that doesn't exist yet and bring our attention...

When something feels urgent, messy, unfair, or completely out of your control, your brain usually has one very compelling suggestion: Figure it out. Now. Fix the pickup situation. Get your kid to calm down. Send the text. Set the boundary. Solve the problem so you can finally stop feeling so damn upset. Except… that's usually the exact moment we are least equipped to make a good decision. In this...

Ever have a huge breakthrough and think, Finally. I fixed it. Then six months later, you're talking about the same relationship, parenting struggle, or deeply annoying family dynamic all over again? That doesn't mean the work isn't working. In this episode, Ann explores why personal growth is less like a straight line and more like a spiral. We return to familiar struggles, but we return with more...

Sometimes "I'm over it" doesn't actually mean you're done. Sometimes it means a part of you knows something painful is coming—and it would very much like to skip ahead to the chapter where everything feels fine again. In this deeply personal episode, Ann shares what she uncovered after admitting she was running out of steam for the hands-on years of parenting. With three children nearing or alread...

Sometimes, the problem isn't that your child refuses to cooperate. Sometimes, the expectations, boundaries, or consequences you've created simply don't fit the human being standing in front of you. And when the container doesn't fit, everybody starts to feel like they're failing. In this episode, Ann Kaplan explores what happens when parents rely on generic rules instead of attuning to the actual...

What if the part of you you're trying so hard to rise above is actually the part you're here to understand? In this episode, Ann explores a teaching from Ram Dass that landed uncomfortably close to home: your humanity is the curriculum. She shares an honest parenting confession about reaching her limit with an older child's persistent negativity—and the rule inside her that says a good parent shou...

What if the thing making parenting feel so high-stakes isn't the actual moment… but the pressure to prove you already know what you're doing? In this episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, Ann explores the idea of "beginner's mind"—the practice of bringing openness, curiosity, and non-attachment to moments we've done a thousand times before. Because here's the sneaky thing: when we decide a mom...

Sometimes we come to coaching because we want an answer. Should I stay or go? Should I say the thing or let it go? Should I push harder, back off, make the decision, fix the problem, get from Point A to Point B already? Totally fair. We are busy people with busy lives and nervous systems that would really appreciate a clear next step, thank you very much. But sometimes, when we get too focused on...

Sometimes the conflict in your house is not really about the backpack on the floor. Rude. Annoying. Deeply inconvenient. Yes. But not really the whole thing. In this episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, Ann Kaplan explores one of the core ideas from The Anatomy of Peace: what if the conflict in your life is less about the other person's behavior and more about how you're seeing them? This one...

What if the thing you're calling "responsibility" is actually a story keeping you exhausted? In this episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, Ann Kaplan talks about the mental load of motherhood, the sneaky trap of believing everything will fall apart without us, and why stepping away can be one of the most loving things we do — not just for ourselves, but for our partners and kids, too. Ann shar...

Why do the same difficult relationship patterns keep showing up? Maybe it is with a parent, partner, child, friend, or coworker. The person may change, but the emotional experience feels strangely familiar. You feel triggered, misunderstood, defensive, or pulled into a version of yourself you do not want to be. Here's what's really going on: some of our hardest relationships reveal the deeper less...

You know that thing you genuinely want to do — the thing you know would make your life better? The parenting support. The break. The healing work. The boundaries. The retreat. Putting the phone down. Actually slowing down. So why are you still not doing it? In this episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, Ann Kaplan unpacks the surprisingly emotional reason we resist the very things we say we wan...

What if the thing you keep talking yourself out of is actually the thing your soul needs most? In this deeply personal episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, I'm unpacking a question I genuinely don't have a perfectly polished answer for yet: Why do we so often say yes to things that drain us… and no to the things that could truly nourish and transform us? As I prepare for my annual parenting a...

What if the problem isn't your child's behavior… but the way that behavior impacts you? In this deeply honest episode of Confessions of a Parent Coach, Ann Kaplan returns to the powerful thread she began in Episodes 157, 159, and 160 — conversations about polarities, impossible situations, and personal power — and brings them together in a final, integrative discussion about parenting, self-regula...

What if your child's struggles aren't evidence that you failed them… but part of what makes them them? In this deeply personal and emotionally layered episode, Ann Kaplan explores one of the most confronting parts of the Enneagram: the childhood experience associated with each type — and why it can feel so painful for parents to hear. Ann shares honestly about her own current season of identity de...

This is one of those episodes that might sting a little… and also might be the biggest exhale you've had in a while. Because if you're a thoughtful parent—if you care this much—you've probably already had the thought: "What if I'm messing them up?" So instead of dancing around it, we're just going to tell the truth: You are. We all are. And that's not actually the problem. In this episode, I'm sha...

What if who you think you are… isn't actually you? In this episode, we're diving into one of the most important (and often misunderstood) distinctions in the Enneagram: Essence vs Personality. Because most of us aren't living from our true self—we're operating from patterns that were formed to protect us. And until you can see that clearly, you'll keep repeating the same reactions, the same confli...