Desperately Seeking

I am not above enjoying some internet commentary. I like to see someone who’s manipulating their audience be called out for their deception, but has it gone too far? It feels like everyone’s an influencer in 2026. Anyone can access affiliate marketing, every brand has some kind of ‘refer a friend’ scheme and there’s no way you don’t know someone in an MLM. So when I see whole channels dedicated to...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Today’s episode was triggered by Hilary Duff’s new album. She has a few songs about family estrangement and, having a lot of experience in this area myself, I thought it was worth talking about. It’s often talked about as a ‘trend’ since it’s picked up on social media but is it? Or is it just more socially acceptabl...

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Have I spoken about this already? Once I started, I felt like we’d already done an episode on it but IF I HAVEN’T, I’ll do a full follow up with a ‘guest’ because I LOVE the topic of the Law of Attraction and I think it’s better demonstrated in conversation than anything else. If you have any of your own examples or questions, send them over and I’ll include them in that episode This is a public e...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com This was a particularly low energy episode.. but that was kind of the point. It’s hard to see it in yourself but vlogging every day this month has forced me to see myself in my life every day. The lack of motivation and convincing myself it was just too cold to get ‘dressed’ has to end with February. I cant control...

Parenting is SO hard at the best of times, but when you feel like the decisions you’re making will have a longer impact, when you have no time to fix things.. that’s when it can feel impossible. Today I’m talking about counselling your kids through the teenage years, choices at school, helping them decide what they want to be when they grow up. We will never know how much or how little our kids ne...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com I want to be clear.. I don’t hate how I look, I’ve always had a pretty healthy body image. I obviously don’t always LOVE how I look, but I' don’t feel awful about myself by any means. That said, sometimes something gets in my psyche and plants a seed. This week, that seed was Sydney Sweeney.

I’m on a bit of a mission this year. From my home to my mind, I want to feel lighter and more organised by the end of it.. so I’m digging through the rubbish. What can stay and what can go? Can I live with this or do I need to move it on? I have my fair share of undesirable personality traits but a lot of them, I’ve realised, make me who I am.. hopefully balanced out with some more positive elemen...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Today’s episode it just for my paid members because it feels a little safer sharing vulnerable, personal stories behind a paywall. That makes absolutely no sense.. but trust me, this is a WHISPER in my mind Sometimes, when you’re still thinking about something that happened 20 years go, it means the relationship has...

The main takeaway from this episode is that ALL THOSE HOURS I spent trying to painstakingly level our voices when we used to remotely record podcasts together was POINTLESS because this was recorded on my phone and we were equidistant from the mic. I am just LOUD! Second to that, I think it IS true that we care less about perception as we age, but maybe in different ways. And the people pleasing i...

This episode is entirely inspired by a chapter in Amy Poehler’s book, Yes, Please! Call your parents today and ask them to tell you about the day you were born. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

Today’s episode is a run through of items I wish I could go back and tell my 30 year old self on my 40th birthday. I was putting this one off so here’s the off the cuff version.. possibly to be updated when the pressure is off This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

This episode was wholly inspired by Cass from Clutter Bug - check her out here - and the final nail in my overwhelm coffin. I cannot tell you how much lighter I feel for doing this and, for those of you who I’ve encouraged to watch that documentary - BUY NOW on Netflix - know that there’s a BALANCE to be found! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get a...

This episode was inspired by a DM exchange I had with someone who also struggles with ADHD and the emotional dysregulation side of things. She asked how to be better, be more compassionate and be more open (less negative) when her partner does feel like sharing with her. I thought it was a great jumping off point for a chat today. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other...

For the longest time, I avoided this practice. The closest I came was ‘gratitude journalling’ because acknowledging your highlights on dark days is helpful in pulling you out of of a funk. Reminding yourself of what you have is always a good thing.. but writing a ‘dear diary, here’s how I’m feeling’ was off putting to me for two reasons. 1. it felt very self indulgent (I mean really, what’s wrong...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com you can find out how to subscribe here: https://mikhila.substack.com/about A bit of accidental journalling did me good today. If I can’t ask for what I want, I can’t blame anyone else for not being able to read my mind.

Today’s episode ticks off my ‘see a brand new show’ item and discusses the frisson of emotion some of us feel strongly when experiencing a liver performance. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

And if you see this… let me know! 😂 This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

On my 40 By 40 bucket list, I had ‘put washer fluid in my car.’ Had I known where the year would take me, I’d have made loftier goals. This year, I’ve had a car hit me, head on, while I was driving - and then drive away. That was a nice bill and a little some to kick off 2025. My car then refused to go in to second gear and a mechanic said it needed a new clutch - which didn’t fix it, so now it st...

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this but I’m planning a themed 40th year, the theme is, ‘Death Becomes Her’. I love that movie, I love Meryl and Goldie, I love the message - did you ever see the interview where Goldie Hawn talked about the original ending? It would have been so much better - and this year I saw the Broadway show in New York with the full cast. It was well known that this particular...

Super quick one today, I made some printable planner pages this time last year and had them as a free download on my blog. That blog is no more but I wanted to reshare with those of you who missed them then. I’ve put them up on smokeandmatches.com , and if you want to see how I used the, the video below is an hour long livestream session I did with some viewers last year. HAPPY PLANNING! This is a...

New York is my favourite city in the world (she says, not being at all well travelled) and I’ve visited so many times I’ve lost count at this point, so how can it be that when talking about this favourite city of mine, I’m always faced with a, ‘oh have you been to - insert famous landmark here ’ and almost always haven’t. I think it’s the baseline assumption that there will always be more time. I’...

I had a conversation with my daughter recently about family. I told her why I make allowances for some relatives and that I felt a weight lift once I realised they were never going to change. She asked why I wouldn’t hold them accountable and I haven’t been able to stop replaying this answer in my head since. I explained that my choice to forgive and move on, without any closure or apology, was ba...

One of my ‘to dos’ this year was to finally read a physical book. That sounds like such a nothing goal, I realise, but carving out that kind of focused time felt impossible - before getting to the question of whether I actually had the attention span anymore. I used to be a voracious reader. I would read walking to work. When I commuted I had loads of time to read and before I had my daughter I re...