Desperately Seeking

I was laughing at Emma in Monday’s episode when she was saying she’s always starting things and then tapering off... but let’s be real. That’s me all over, isn’t it? I was talking to a friend recently about a guy she just started seeing. He was consistently letting her down and arriving late or not at all. I said, ‘I am absolutely on your side... we think this guy is a jerk and he’s messing you ar...

Emma is back for an episode that just did not want to be! Even the editing was delayed because my laptop would not accept the footage!! CURSED, I tell you. We chatted about the difficulties of learning new things as we age, just wanting things to WORK when we plug them in, the unknown enemy that is AI and my recent dabble with app-blocking software to prevent me losing my entire life to my phone.....

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com When I tell you I was struck down with technical difficulties this week.. My phone was gaslighting me in to pretending it had no storage, by way of corrupt data. After wiping that and starting over (which was a whole thing because I lost access to my authenticator app for my work laptop the week of a whole new IT ro...

First and foremost - the first episode with Lee is RAPIDLY climbing my ‘most popular’ list, and when you consider it’s a MEMBERS ONLY, that’s bonkers! I created a little group chat on insta, for listeners to weigh on on future episodes and MAYBE even talk among themselves (it’s early days.. nobody wants to make the first move) and the poll in that group was pretty heavily weighted towards another...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Welcome back to Desperately Seeking and to a brand new *MAYBE* series, ‘couples therapy’. The idea is to cover hot relationship topics with my husband of 14 years, answer questions you guys send in ..and will we talk about the importance of reality television as pseudo psychology and a way to open up conversation ab...

Someone just reached out to me on instagram, thanking me for sharing my own journey with sobriety and recommending a great mocktail syrup I should try. Every time someone DMs me or leaves a comment to say they’re trying it for themselves, I feel a little swell of pride - for both of us. But that pride is often followed by a pang of guilt, because if I’m praising you for something, I must be condem...

I’m Mikhila, and I’m a rage-oholic. I didn’t recognise this trait in myself until a few years ago, because it’s not even a little but the case in my real life. I’m not an angry person, I don’t shout or argue people down. I’ll debate, don’t get me wrong.. I don’t agree with everyone, but I’m not aggressive when irritated and I have never felt the urge to punch a wall, or a person. So then, why am I...

I’ve been consuming A LOT of money mindset content recently. I want to hear from people who’ve turned their finances around and are sharing their journey. It’s inspiring to know what motivates change and I always learn more from someone who’s struggled than a natural savant. read more at https://mikhila.substack.com/ This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Today’s bonus episode is audio AND visual. Once again coming at you from my car with a rant about how women are raised to feel like they should be less. Check out mikhila.com to watch the video on Substack

This year, I’ve been sharing my monthly spending on YouTube, with the larger goal to finally getting my financial s**t together. Turning 40, I had a bit of an ‘enough is enough’ epiphany and decided to start no only limiting my spending, but really scrutinising it. One question I received was from someone who truly did not get it (or me) and wanted to know what my longterm plan was. Surely I wasn’...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Today’s episode touches on some ‘sensitive’ ground but I don’t think it should be. We’ve always been on different sides but NOW, if you’re not on my side, you’re my enemy. That shouldn’t be the case and it’s no way to change hearts and minds. It just keeps us further apart - and you know SOMEONE is benefitting …

This was inspired by a previous episode, a conversation with Lee and THIS fantastic interview between Lena Dunham and Drew Barrymore. I’d highly recommend you give that a watch, if this is your thing. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com I was a bad first wife to my first husband. Almost 20 years later, I can see why.

dipping back in to the archives today, I thought this chat was relevant to a conversation I had last week. It was originally recorded as a YouTube video - apologies for the spotty audio - but I didn’t think I could re-record it and capture the same energy so.. here we are. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila....

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com My first Substack VLOG. I wanted to document my feelings before and after my ADHD assessment and it felt like a good time to try video along with audio.

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Since giving up alcohol (originally temporarily) at the end of 2024, I really haven’t missed it at all. I thought I would. I assumed I had a budding dependence (part of why I stopped) and genuinely thought it would be a struggle. It turns out, once my brain decides on something, it’s VERY easy. A similar thing happe...

Today’s episode is from the archives. A no longer available YouTube video, now in audio form. Not everything is your job, so Milo tell me. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila.substack.com/subscribe

We watched SNL UK at the weekend and, as huge SNL fans, we were hopeful but nervous. Would it translate? Would the inevitable critical reviews kill it immediately? Would it even find an audience over here? I think they did a great job on their debut, some of the cast members are definitely future stars and Lee and I both agreed it was better than we’d imagined it would be. But he said something sp...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Today’s episode is a chat with my friend, Karen, who suffered her own annus horribilis back in 2021. She found dark humour saw her through adjusting to her new normal and that’s how we first bonded.. because I too enjoy laughing through pain. But not everybody gets it.. and that’s what we’re talking about today.

I asked on instagram for some questions for an agony aunt episode and I didn’t get quite enough to separate them in to themed episodes so we’ll kick off with my favourites in this mixed episode and hopefully you’ll send in some more for next time. You can DM me on instagram @mikhilamcdaid or email me at hello@mikhila.com This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscriber...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com In 2024, at the age of 38, I was diagnosed with ADHD. I had been wrestling with the idea of private assessments for a long time. I had some amount of guilt based in my privilege at having access to that service where others do not, I also felt like a private diagnosis would be less valid. The real issue there was, v...

Welcome back to the newly renamed Desperately Seeking This week I was seeking clarity , I wanted to know why people pick up gardening in midlife who’ve never shown much interest previously and along the way I realised it’s exactly the same reason people who’ve previously been somewhat messy with money will decide to get a handle on their person finances. I was talking with a friend recently about...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Today’s episode is on the heels of a particularly rude run of interactions on social media this week, some of the conversations that followed and how I am (and I wish I was) dealing with criticism of my life and the way I show up online. Nobody’s voice should be louder than yours in your own head.

Today we’re talking about why comparing yourself to the school gate mums (or worst still ONLINE mums) is not only pointless, but also not fair to anyone. We’re all parenting selfishly, you just have to recognise it and LET GO of your guilt for not doing the things you hate. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit mikhila...

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit mikhila.substack.com Today we’re talking about the difference between wanting to be seen and wanting to be HEARD and why women are raised to think attention seeking is a negative trait while men are encouraged to be bold and assertive.