Chickens Are The New Kittens

⚠️ CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains discussions of animal trauma, animal death/injury, and childhood trauma that some listeners may find upsetting or triggering. Please listen with care, and feel free to skip this one if those topics are difficult for you. Tom & Jerry starts with two traumatic animal encounters: Beth’s involving a kitten, Chelsey’s involving a mouse, and both apparently earn...

Beth and Chelsey are putting their friendship to the ultimate test with a couples game they arguably deserve to play together more than they do with anyone they’ll ever actually be in a relationship with. They’ll have to match answers, decide who came up with the better response, and survive a few rounds of this-or-that without questioning everything they thought they knew about each other and the...

⚠️ BIG, GIANT, SERIOUSLY-WE-MEAN-IT DISCLAIMER: This episode contains explicit content, sexual discussions, adult themes, and a LOT of foul language. Headphones are strongly recommended unless you’re prepared to answer some uncomfortable follow-up questions from nearby children, coworkers, or your parents. Beth and Chelsey are talking about books. Again. This time, they’re confessing why certain b...

We’re back! And it’s just as strange… Would you want to know every time someone lies to you, or would you rather everyone else know when you’re lying? Would you want the real reason someone ghosted you, or are some things better left buried in the litter box? This week, Beth and Chelsey put curiosity to the test with a series of “would you rather know” scenarios, and surprisingly, they agree on a...

Ever wondered if “Bless your heart” is actually a blessing? This week, Beth and Chelsey dive into the wonderfully petty world of backhanded compliments, passive-aggressive one-liners, and those sneaky phrases that sound polite but definitely aren’t. They debate which ones are harmless, which ones deserve the ax, and whether they’ve ever been guilty of using a few themselves… or might start now. Na...

This week, Beth and Chelsey are diving into the best and worst books they’ve read lately, including the stories they couldn’t put down and the ones they wish they could unread, or finish reading. Along the way, they discuss the age-old debate, do audiobooks actually count as reading, and they’re not afraid to disagree. Between book talk, they keep Sookie happily supplied with treats while sampling...

⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode contains in-depth discussions of infertility, IVF, miscarriage, pregnancy loss, grief, trauma, and the emotional impact of fertility treatments. These topics may be especially difficult for anyone who has experienced infertility, pregnancy loss, or PTSD related to those experiences. 🔞 Explicit Content Warning: This episode contains adult language and frank convers...

What started as a simple taste test between Beth and Chelsey quickly turned into a full-blown family snack showdown. Armed with treats from around the world, we sampled everything from surprisingly delicious to wonderfully questionable, rating each bite along the way. The temptation proved too much for Beth’s kids to resist, and before long they had pulled up chairs and joined the competition. Tog...

Think you know Beth? Chelsey thought she did… until this game proved otherwise. In this episode Beth shares a series of completely true stories, and Chelsey has to decide whether they actually happened to Beth or to someone else. From outrageous childhood adventures to unbelievable adult moments, every story is real, but not every story belongs to Beth. Chelsey got off to a rough start, but manage...

Court is officially in session! In this episode, Chelsey and Beth put their vacation on trial, arguing over five different categories to determine who was truly guilty of the biggest “vacation offenses”. Some verdicts were unanimous, others sparked heated debate, but every case led them deeper into the stories behind the road trip and beach adventures. Along the way, they uncover the moments that...

On this Independence Day weekend… What happens when you ask the kids what they really thought about spending 39 hours in a car with your best friend? In this episode, Chelsey hears their completely unfiltered opinions for the very first time, and let’s just say… they don’t hold back. Once the laughter (and mild emotional damage) settles, Chelsey shares her own thoughts about road-tripping with the...

Did you miss us? GOOD! The internet made us do it… and we’re only slightly ashamed. 😅 This week, we’re talking about all the hobbies, recipes, crafts, kitchen experiments, gifts, gadgets, and random habits we’ve picked up thanks to Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, Pinterest, and the endless rabbit holes of the internet. Which trends stuck? Which costs more than they were worth? Which ones were total...

This week on Chickens Are the New Kittens, we kick things off with weekly recaps—told in an ABC format. What starts as a simple catch-up quickly turns into a discussion about our ever-growing collections of unread books and whether buying more books and actually reading them are even related hobbies at this point. Along the way, a little alcohol is involved, which may or may not contribute to the...

This week on Chickens Are the New Kittens, the girls peck through 101 personality traits to determine whether each one belongs to Beth, Chelsey, both, or neither. Between bites of Qdoba and several emotionally charged accusations, they discover one of them may actually be “Feral but Functional” while the other is just one match stick away from a felony. There’s bickering, there’s awareness, there’...

This week on Chickens Are the New Kittens, Beth and Chelsey enter the Delulu Olympics, where confidence is high, qualifications are low, and absolutely nobody is prepared. From fake athlete personas to wildly inflated self-belief, the women compete in events like Financial Gymnastics, the Overthinking Floor Routine, and Delusional Confidence. They debate whether impulsive hobbies, emotional suppor...

This week on Chickens Are the New Kittens, Beth and Chelsey play “Real, Fake, or Wisconsin News,” trying to figure out whether bizarre headlines are real, completely made up, or somehow happened right here in our backyard. The stories get weird and unhinged, and there are way too many moments where the answer could honestly be all three. Along the way, the conversation spirals into hyper-specific...

This week on Chickens Are the New Kittens, Beth, Chelsey, and their friend JJ sit down for a conversation that starts with doing their nails and quickly turns into a deep dive on love, relationships, and connection. Along the way, they spiral into tangents about food, ADHD, life experiences, sobriety, and the weird ways our brains work. Some moments are hilarious, some get unexpectedly emotional,...

Beth and Chelsey are coming in hot with a full recap of what might actually be the best day ever—and no, they’re not exaggerating. It kicks off with a cozy, indulgent lunch at Le Reve Patisserie & Café, setting the tone for a day that just kept getting better. From there, they get swept into the magic of Alice in Wonderland Ballet Milwaukee, fully embracing the whimsy, the artistry, and the “we sh...

In this episode of Chickens Are The New Kittens, we attempt to pick a lunch spot for before the ballet… and immediately spiral. What should be a quick decision turns into gardening updates, TV shows Chelsey is very behind on, and a passionate breakdown of actors we love for questionable reasons. We somehow detour into Beth’s kids speaking different languages (one well… and another not so much), ou...

Beth and Chelsey put their ears to the ultimate test in this chaotic guessing game, challenging each other with everyday objects that definitely “make noise”… but don’t always make sense. Eyes closed tight and relying purely on instinct, they take turns throwing out guesses that range from oddly impressive to completely unhinged. Is the game fair? That’s up for debate. Let’s just say someone may o...

This one gets real, real fast. Chelsey steps into the driver’s seat, tossing out prompts that crack things open as Beth and guest Nick dig into the chaos, growth, and hard-earned wisdom between marriage round one and round two. Nothing is off limits: what went wrong, what we ignored, what we swore we’d never repeat… and what we somehow did anyway. We lay out the differences between first and secon...

Two girls, one wizarding world, and a whole lot of opinions, this week we’re diving headfirst into the Marauders and asking the real question: were they actually good people, or just really loyal to each other? We break down the chaos, the friendship, the questionable choices, and yes, the bullying, because let’s be honest, these boys were a mixed bag. Chelsey and I agree on most of it (shocking,...

HAPPY EASTER!!! We’re still months away from our family vacation, but that didn’t stop us from discussing it like we leave tomorrow. This episode kicks off with us discussing our plans, but quickly turns into stories from past trips, random tangents, and absolute chaos. Chelsey is joining our family/anniversary vacation, which somehow raises both the excitement and the risk level. We’ve got a rumm...

In this episode, we put random things on the chopping block and make each other choose which one has to go, no logic, just vibes. From everyday habits to oddly specific preferences, nothing is safe and some of these choices get way more heated than they should. We agree more than we expected, which is suspicious, but the disagreements come in hot and loud. Somewhere between debating and defending...

Chelsey didn’t just suggest the gym, she pulled Beth into a light CrossFit-style workout… no machines, no plan, and absolutely no business doing it after their very unofficial “breaks” from fitness. What unfolds is equal parts determination, regret, and “why do our legs hate us?” as they attempt to remember how bodies are supposed to move. Somewhere between the sweat, the laughter, and the mild id...