You've Got to Be Critting Me

Back in Sestone, the party takes stock of their belongings, gets a few mysterious magical items identified, and learns that Todd’s mask may be connected to something far more powerful than they realized. After sharing the story of their recent adventures with the townsfolk, Sefi is approached by Jeremiah, who asks to join the party and begin his own journey as an adventurer. Despite plenty of warn...

Hey guys, Travis here. Quick update on Episode 40: I’m working hard to get it finished, but unfortunately my full-time day job keeps insisting on being “important” and “necessary to survive.” I don’t want to rush the episode out before it’s fully polished and sounding the way you’ve come to expect from us, so give me just a couple more days and we’ll have that sweet, sweet content ready for your t...

The dream is over… and everything they stole is gone. Back in the real world, the party sets their sights on Pendilor, but first, a detour south. A midnight break-in, memories brought to life, and Thormir’s first swimming lesson await. DM: Jeffery Jordan Malcius: Travis Stewart Sefi: Morgan Gibson Thormir: Nick Miller Todd: Bryce Shearer Podcast art by Ada Hath Theme song "Royal Joust" by Bardcore...

Our heroes make it to the mountain in search of the missing villagers, only to discover that something huge might be waiting for them in the shadows. DM: Jeffery Jordan Malcius: Travis Stewart Sefi: Morgan Gibson Thormir: Nick Miller Todd: Bryce Shearer Podcast art by Ada Hath Theme song "Royal Joust" by Bardcore. Follow them on YouTube , Spotify , and Apple Music Additional DM elements by Loresmy...

Rory is back, but that does not mean the party is any closer to escaping the trial. After learning Todd’s transformation may be tied to the void, the Dragon King, and something far more dangerous than they understood, the group returns to Moonstone and finds the village completely abandoned. With no clear path forward, the party decides to trust their motes and follow wherever they lead. DM: Jeffe...

Todd is back to normal. Mostly. Probably. For now. After some unexpected divine intervention, the party tries to unpack Todd’s sudden transformation, his new connection to a terrifying rat patron, and the very inconvenient fact that this may happen again. Soon. But there’s still a festival to attend, babies to bless, and apparently baby versions of Thormir and Malcius to emotionally process. As th...

What should have been a celebration turns into chaos when Todd transforms far sooner than anyone expected. As the party scrambles to contain the fallout, they’re left with troubling new questions about the Blessing of the Newborns, Todd’s fate, and Rory’s disappearance DM: Jeffery Jordan Malcius: Travis Stewart Sefi: Morgan Gibson Thormir: Nick Miller Todd: Bryce Shearer Podcast art by Ada Hath Th...

Proll and his bandits make the mistake of standing in the party’s way, forcing Eric, Nyl, and C-Smooth into their first real fight. As the battle turns messy and the party scrambles to survive, they get their first taste of how dangerous the road to the caves really is, and what victory might cost. DM: Jeffery Jordan Eric the Cleric: Travis Stewart C-Smooth: Cornelius Stewart II Nyltra: Lynn Stewa...

A strange job. An abandoned wagon. A trail full of bad signs. In Episode 2 of You’ve Got to Be Critting Me: Parental Advisory , Eric, Nyl, and C-Smooth press onward toward a mysterious cave system as odd encounters and mounting danger make it clear their first adventure will not be a simple one. DM: Jeffery Jordan Eric the Cleric: Travis Stewart C-Smooth: Cornelius Stewart II Nyltra: Lynn Stewart...

For this special episode of You’ve Got to Be Critting Me , Travis and Jeff welcome two brand-new players to the table for a one-shot built around the Heroes of the Borderlands starter set. What begins as a simple introduction to character sheets, spells, and class choices quickly turns into a funny, charming, and surprisingly wholesome dive into the joy of learning Dungeons & Dragons for the f...

The Winter Lunar Festival continues, but the longer the party stays, the harder it becomes to ignore that something is deeply wrong. As night falls without warning, the music stops and a makeshift arena is revealed at the heart of the celebration. What begins as harmless festival entertainment quickly turns personal when Sefi signs up to fight under a false name, and Todd follows suit with an alia...

The party finds itself deeper within Rory’s trial as the illusion around them grows increasingly convincing, and increasingly dangerous. What began as a familiar Winter Lunar Festival in Thormir’s homeland quickly reveals itself to be something far more unsettling: a version of the past where loss never came, loved ones still walk the streets, and joy comes far too easily. As Thormir returns to hi...

The party awakens from Rory’s unsettling trial and steps into a world transformed. Snow covers the earth, the cold cuts to the bone, and a familiar fear settles over Thormir as he recognizes a place that should not exist. The Winter Lunar Festival is alive with music, color, and celebration, yet something in the air feels wrong, as if the world itself is holding its breath. Each hero senses that t...

The party finally begins their long-promised training with Rory, the enigmatic druid who’s been guiding Thor­mir’s connection to his mote. What starts as peaceful meditation (and Sefi’s ill-advised mushroom trip) quickly spirals into a chaotic, high-stakes battle as Rory pushes the group far beyond their comfort zones. Between booming blades, teleporting strikes, bardic marches, shape-shifting, sp...

After their brutal battle with the bandits, tensions simmer as the party hauls their prisoners back toward Beckinsdale, only for Thormir’s glowing mote to suddenly dart off the path, leading them into a mysterious spore-filled forest. There, they encounter Rory , a weathered dwarven druid wreathed in fungi who claims to be a guide across worlds. Inside his glowing mushroom cottage, the party meets...

The battle at the bandit camp reaches its breaking point as spells flare, blades clash, and tempers run hot. When one of the surviving bandits surrenders, the party finds themselves at odds, especially Todd and Malcius, whose clashing beliefs over justice and mercy threaten to tear the group apart. Should they let the survivor live to answer for his crimes, or finish what they started? With emotio...

The party pushes deeper into the woods outside Beckinsdale and finally discovers the bandit camp behind the recent burglaries. Malcius tries to talk his way out, but blades are soon drawn. What begins as a tense standoff quickly erupts into chaos as Sefi wades into the fray, Todd and Thormir square off against ruthless raiders, and spells flash through the trees. Narrow escapes, bloodied blades, a...

A year ago, our party set out on a wild quest. Now, one year later, the adventure’s only just begun. Join the celebration (and maybe win some loot)! Check with us in the next few days to find out how to enter to win! DM: Jeffery Jordan Malcius: Travis Stewart Sefi: Morgan Gibson Thormir: Nick Miller Todd: Bryce Shearer Podcast art by Ada Hath Theme song "Royal Joust" by Bardcore. Follow them on Yo...

The party wakes at the Brave Lion, where breakfast brings more than just food, it brings reminders of last night’s chaos. With the mysterious tree now gone, they return to the Lion’s Den to settle damages, test Todd’s questionable “repair” skills, and confront the costs of their choices. But as gold is handed over and cracks are mended, the ceiling above still tells a different story, and new shad...

Need to catch up before diving into the next chapter? This special recap episode of You’ve Got to Be Critting Me covers everything from Episodes 15–26. Join Malcius, Sefi, Thormir, and Todd as they battle cavern-dwelling horrors, fight off gnolls alongside a vengeful one-tusked giant, stumble through burglary investigations, and unleash pure chaos with a bag of magic beans that sends a beanstalk c...

A quiet night at the Lion’s Den turns into absolute chaos when Thormir plants one of Malcius’ mysterious beans. What sprouts is no ordinary garden variety tree, it’s a massive magical fruit tree that blasts straight through the tavern roof. Things go from bad to worse when Todd, already a little too deep into the drinks, grabs one of the glowing fruits and suddenly finds himself belching fire like...

The party continues their investigation into the string of burglaries plaguing the town. At the Dependable Depot, the group learns that weapons and healing potions were stolen in a meticulous break-in, raising suspicions about someone preparing for something larger. While questioning the shopkeepers, Todd discovers one of them secretly purchased a dangerous magical item, a set of golden shackles s...

After a chaotic night at Jimbo’s farm, the party regroups at the Lion’s Den for some much-needed rest… and a questionable number of breakfast beers. Thormir sharpens a femur into a makeshift weapon, Malcius gets magically freshened up, and Todd discovers he may not be the only one watching. The group brings their findings to the town guard, revealing what they saw through the portal and the growin...

The party wakes up after a harrowing night at Jimbo’s farm, where a mysterious giant escaped through a portal but not without promising to return. As Sefi contemplates her mortality and Malcius strums away in quiet reflection, the team regroups at the Lion’s Den for a hearty breakfast (with varying opinions on melons). But the calm doesn’t last long. A secret note appears under Todd’s bread, Thorm...

A mysterious giant, a moonlit battlefield, and a very revealing tooth. The party finds themselves in a chaotic showdown as they fight to stop an unexpected escape. Thormir makes a shocking connection to his past and tries to keep the giant pinned with Moonbeam, and Sefi throws herself (literally) into grappling the impossible. Meanwhile, Malcius pulls the psychic strings with dissonant whispers, a...